Where We Belong
by Rainpebbles
Summary: Impala Series Part XIV: Castiel has an episode that has everyone concerned about his recovery and Dean isn't sure how to fix it this time. Meanwhile, an intruder finds his way on to the ship. He's on the hunt, and his prey is close by. Destiel and Sabriel.
1. Chapter 1

Notes: OMG! The last episode! Holy pumpernickel!

leahelisabeth: I swear you can read minds, but I am indeed trying to get some more sabriel in. Sadly this epi doesn't originally have much to go on, but I added it in anyway. Gotta have some Sammy XD And I am soooo happy you liked the pranks and fluff! :D

ship. me: Hello! Hiya! *teeheehee, you liked it and I'm all happy* And I totally gotta have some more BAMF!Cas. It's just too much fun to write...well, so is fluff. I really like writing fluff now XD

Disclaimer: * maniacal laughter that melts into gross sobbing*

* * *

CHAPTER 1

He wasn't sure if he was dreaming.

Most of him felt like it was far too real for it to be anything but reality, but part of him wanted it to be anything but. All around him he was surrounded by white. Everything was so white, even the soft cotton shirt and pants he wore were stark and blinding, but he had never felt so dirty. He heard, no, felt someone coming for him. They would take him back to where they would touch him again, dig into him, remove parts of him…destroy him.

He felt their hands trail down his back and he wanted to flinch away, but suddenly he found himself strapped belly-down firmly, unable to even lift his head an inch away from the cold metal surface. That was when he felt something move under his skin. It felt like there were a million little insects crawling just under his skin, raising it in great waves that would ripple visibly. He wanted to wake up now.

Even when he closed his eyes it was still too bright in that room. He felt the hands return, stroking the raised ridges where the insects continued to push up against the thinning layer of epidermis. Never had he felt so revolted. Everything itched and he pulled at his bound wrists and arms to try and free them. All he wanted was to scratch away at his shoulders until he had removed enough to rip out the invaders and relive the growing pressure. Those foreign things didn't belong in him. They had put them there.

"_Take them out! Please!" _

"_Shh, little brother. It'll be alright. You're so very special…"_

The hands continued to stroke gently.

No, he wasn't special. He wasn't anything anymore. Castiel no longer existed. They were turning him into a monster. There was nothing natural left. If he opened his eyes and saw his reflection in the metal table, surely he would only see a demon staring back at him.

"_No! Don't touch me! Dean! Dean, help me!"_

He saw a hand pick up a knife from a table to his left and then moved out of sight behind him.

"_Don't worry, dear Castiel. This will only hurt a moment…"_

"_No! DEAN!"_

* * *

"Whoa, whoa, Cas! Wake up! Cas!"

Dean was thrown back as Cas suddenly launched up from the sheets, gasping and crying out as if in pain. Immedietely Dean moved right back up close and cupped the panicked face in his hands, cooing to him in a comforting tone.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm here, I'm here. Everything is fine."

Dean felt the damp clothes on Cas as he held him tight. He was absolutely drenched in sweat and his face was streaked with tears. Dean knew all about waking up like this. He'd had his fair share of nightmares in the past, so he knew to let Cas gather his emotions and thoughts for a moment and slowly center himself again. He knew Cas was back with him when he finally turned his troubled eyes to Dean, gratitude and fear shining in them.

"Jeez, man. That was quite the nightmare, huh? You gonna talk about it?"

The tousled head shook violently. Dean sighed heavily and pulled Cas tighter to his chest, helping chase away the sudden chill of his skin. He wouldn't force Cas to talk about it. Not now anyways, not while it was still so fresh in his troubled mind. He glanced at the clock and noted that they would have been up in an hour anyway. No way either of them was getting back to sleep after this. At least later that day Cas was supposed to have a meditation session with Anna, then maybe after that he'd be ready to open up. Can't have emotions piling up on him, not ever again.

"That's fine. We can wait till later…you going to try and go back to sleep?"

Another shake of his head.

"How about we go up to the control room for a bit then?"

A pause, and then a nod.

"Okay, let's get dressed."

* * *

They had only done this a few times in the past, the two of them sitting against the back wall of the room, lights out and looking out over the stars. Normally this was Sam's and Gabriel's place, but they weren't the only ones who found the stars calming. They had been sitting there for about twenty minutes so far, and they hadn't spoken yet. Dean had been taking in the opportunity to observe Cas, looking for any signs of major discomfort.

In the last year, Dean had become an expert on knowing what was wrong with Cas just by a few twitches or looks. He had mastered the same thing with Sam to where he didn't even have to look at Sam's face to know when he was sad, happy, angry, or even hungry. It was just one of those things that Dean felt he had to do with those he cared about. He wanted to know right away when one of them was hurting so that he could try and fix it as soon as possible. Stop the pain right then and there.

Right now he could see that Cas back was bothering him greatly. Looked like they were heading into a bad day. He made a mental note to ask Bobby if they could maybe up the doses today. He could also see the pure exhaustion that was plain on his features. The dark marks had reappeared under his eyes and his skin had once again been reduced to a dull pallor. Dean would have liked to have just written that off as Cas still recovering from being low on mojo. He was still giving daily "glow treatments" to Sam for his leg after the klutz had injured it again when he tripped over some equipment Chuck left out. Then of course Cas had also insisted on healing Bobby's head, Anna's bruised stomach…it took Dean days to finally get Cas to finish healing his own ribs. Now it had been over a week after the fight back at the bordello and he was still running on empty.

He sighed and leaned his head back, his eyes closing wearily for a moment. Then he heard Cas' hesitant voice speak up next to him.

"Dean?"

"Yeah?"

"Do you…do you love my insides? The parts you can't see?"

Dean frowned and opened his eyes to see if Cas was being serious. The slight crease between his eyebrows told the Captain that he was.

"Uh, sure, Cas. Eyeballs to entrails."

This seemed to make Cas relax a bit, but only a bit before the smaller man turned his attention back to the stars.

"Cas—"

"I've been naming the stars. I doubt they know who they are and I thought it would be nice if they could know that," he glanced at Dean and gave him a concerned look, "Problem is I've named them all the same thing. There's terrible confusion."

Dean balked, a little thrown by the odd statement, "Well, uh, why don't you think of some new names?"

Cas shrugged, "There are trillions of stars out there Dean. I wouldn't be able to remember them all, and I…how would they feel if I had forgotten who they were? Nobody would ever remember who they used to be…they would just have to be given a new name, made into something else. How tragic."

Dean was about to say something when Bobby appeared in the door and glanced down at them, "Ah, there you are. Chuck says he needs to talk to you about a new compression coil. He's in the engine room whenever you're ready."

"Uh, thanks Bobby. I'll be right there," Dean said and slowly stood up, stretching his legs out where they had gone tingly. He glanced down at Cas, still looking lost out at the stars. Bobby noticed and nudged the Captain slightly.

"I'm going to take Cas to get his meds. He's looking like he might need a stronger dose today. I'll bring him to the dining area to help with breakfast after," he said casually, but it was as close to a comforting hug as Bobby was willing to do in the presence of others. Dean felt it and regarded him with enough warmth to toast a marshmallow before placing a quick kiss to Cas' cheek and then leaving the room.

He promised himself he would talk to Cas about his nightmare later.

* * *

Balthazar used to live the happiest of lives. He lived on one of the richest planets in the 'verse in one of the most beautiful old houses, all along with his two cherished brothers. Ahead of each of them was a wonderful future all laid out nice and pretty. He loved his life and his family and that was all he needed.

But like all wonderful things, they had to crash and burn at some point.

He would have liked to think that by the time that he had lost his elder brother, his father, and then his baby brother, that this was it. This crushing emptiness was the absolute most painful experience that he could ever possible go through, that anymore and surely his heart would implode from life sucking everything out of it. Oh, how wrong he was.

There was one moment in his past that stood out among all others as that one single event that still had him waking at night in a cold sweat, and even still haunted him daily every time he saw Castiel. It was that moment when he held his little brother tight as their escape ship took them away from the Host.

Before he made his daring rescue, he had pictured the same moment again and again in his mind of how his reunion would be once he found Cassy. How could he not? It was what drove him through years of tracking and trading his way to finally having an actual plan to go and save his brother. He had spent their entire fortune in getting that plan together.

But that moment when he had finally peeled the terrified and confused Castiel away from where he had nuzzled against his chest, he saw those much beloved blue eyes and knew right away. Castiel was different. He was…altered.

The night that he thought that he would have spent with his little brother, catching up on all their missed time together turned out to be him listening to the ramblings of a madman. He just sat there on the floor while he watched his once so innocent and serious baby brother drew with chalk on the floor and talked about flowers and bees.

He had spent years fantasizing about finding Cassy, only to find a broken doll that just looked like him. As Cassy finally stopped drawing and instead tried to start counting the stars through the metal ceiling, Balthazar he moved his thoughts to his other brother. Gabriel had been at the Host as some point, but even through his very extensive investigation of the Host during the planning stages, he had not found one word about his elder brother. Was he still at the Host? Hidden deep within the depths were he would never find him? Was he suffering like Castiel, driven out of his mind? Was he dead? Was he even still there at all?

Then he thought about that one document that showed that their father had been the one to sponsor that…monstrosity, that hell. He had probably left when he saw his two sons driven to madness. Why else would he be too afraid to show his face anymore?

Cassy had started to cry off in the corner suddenly, horrible sobs that had him gasping for air and screaming and choking. It went on for hours and hours. It wasn't until Balthazar had gotten the cryo-box and put Castiel to sleep inside of it that it stopped, and only then did Balthazar allow himself to break down into his own shattered cries.

As he sat against the box that now contained his brother, Balthazar couldn't help but think if it might have been easier for everyone if Castiel had been dead.

That was then, though. Now Balthazar had been able to watch as Castiel went from a trembling mess to a, well, a somewhat more stable man. He even got to see Cassy fall in love, an event he had given up on long ago when he was still 16 and told Balthazar he didn't like going to parties because there were too many people. He had even gotten Gabriel back in one piece and was now seeing him happy and content in the arms of someone that he loved. Another something that Balthazar had given up on happening when he found Gabriel in bed with four girls once, years and years ago.

His two brothers were happy, hell, Balthazar was happy. And he owed it all to the Winchesters for giving them a home and their love. Sappy thing that it was. He owed both Sam and Dean so much.

Dean perhaps he owed a bit more. Even with the rockiness that they had faced and also had yet to face, Balthazar had seen a marked improvement that could only have been because of Dean's help. He only hoped that as Cassy's pain and distress were slowly growing more and more apparent, Dean could pull another miracle out his back pocket and get them past that hurdle as he had all the last ones.

He couldn't lose his brothers again, not after all they had been through.

* * *

Woot, set-up chapter all said and done, plot comes along in the next chapter! See y'all then!


	2. Chapter 2

Notes: Shoot, this was a long one. Enjoy!

leahelisabeth: Don't cry! Quick! Here's another chapter! :D p.s. I'm totally gonna bawl my eyes out when I finish this series. I might even go back and write fillers so it never ends XD

Disclaimer: *goes to touch fandoms and gets her wrist slapped*

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CHAPTER 2

Everyone was weary in some way. Mostly it was from worry over one person or a few, or the whole crew even. Gabriel and Sam's thought were constantly shifting between each other and their respective brothers, never once thinking about themselves. He had lost count of how many times he had heard Bobby sigh and rub a hand over his face. The old preacher was torn between letting the crew work through their own issues and sitting them all down for one very intense talk, perhaps even a few biffs upside the head. Anna and Dean hadn't said anything about her news, but Cas knew. He could see how scared Dean was of losing a friend, and how worried Anna was about losing her family and home. Cas could understand Anna's agony at the thought of being forced to leave.

When he had first figured out what was upsetting her so, he had run to the engine room to interrupt a very confused Chuck and laid himself down next to the glowing engine. At least Chuck's presence wasn't a bother. His constantly confused and lost thoughts seemed to fit right in with Castiel's own emotions and it didn't feel like a bleed over from anyone else.

This morning after Bobby had given him his meds, he felt a familiar wave of despair that seemed to float around the ship when the crew was all finally awake enough for their worries to filter back into their minds to replace dreams and such. He drifted back to the engine room, noting that Dean seemed to have already left a few minutes earlier. Chuck looked like he was about to take a break for breakfast and nodded to Castiel, no longer surprised to see the young man floating in and out at any time.

"Hiya, Castiel. You coming to breakfast?"

"No."

The mechanic frowned, "You're not hungry? Should I get Dean or Bobby, or maybe on of your brothers?"

Again, more worrying and Castiel almost snapped, but instead he calmly shook his head at both questions and laid down in his usual spot beside the engine. He heard Chuck exit the room and sighed at the momentary relief he felt at the solitude.

His voice fell into the familiar echoing hum, trying to let the vibrations become ingrained in himself in some sort of physical memory. Of course he was upset at the idea of someone leaving their home, but what upset him more was the thought of what would happen if _he_ ever had to leave. He couldn't imagine how painful it would be to be ripped from the Impala. It would be like tearing off a limb, it would be like tearing out his heart. What would ever posses him to leave, he didn't even want to try and fathom.

He lay in there for hours, Chuck coming in and out and working around his prone form and thankfully not trying to talk to him too much. Well, perhaps he _had_ tried to talk too much and Castiel had just blocked him out.

It was a weird sensation for him to feel so tired. The healing of Sam's leg had indeed weakened him, but that was only half the story. Everyone on the ship was just so…drained. Emotionally, physically, and it fell to Castiel. How odd was it to not need to sleep, but still feel a constant heavy drag of eyelids or heart? He had found himself actually trying to fall asleep more than he ever had before, just to try and knock away the feeling. It was a long process that involved a lot of staring off at nothing, being rocked by the ship and sung lullabies from the engine. Even so, he was never sure if he was actually asleep. Dean had told him that when he did this, his eyes usually stayed open. In the back of his mind he knew that this made the Captain and the others uncomfortable, but it's not like he could help it.

Today, he once again found himself in the floaty state in between sleep and awareness, where time melts away until it drips by without you noticing. In this half-alert mode, he suddenly heard a voice.

"_We're all just floating…" _

Slowly he sat up, trying to latch on to the echo to determine the source. He didn't know if it was a voice from another world, another time, or whether it was someone near and solid. He felt odd, detached somehow, like he wasn't actually there but a ghost instead.

He didn't even feel his feet upon the floor as he stood up and made his way out of the engine room. He wasn't even aware of the direction he seemed to be going, he just let himself be led by whatever force was moving his limbs. Oh how tired he was of being a puppet. He had thought that he had cut those controlling strings long ago.

He didn't remember going through the corridor, but suddenly he found himself floating through the common area where Balthazar and Chuck were lounging on the couches, both holding a mug of coffee in their hands as they chatted. It was rather pleasant to see at first, Balthazar socializing again. His elder brother had been so good at talking with people of all sorts, something that Castiel had always been a little bit jealous of. And Chuck just looked happy to be hearing what was one of Balthazar's favorite stories from his wild youth. Castiel smiled when he recognized it.

Chuck's mouth was hanging open in shock, "No way! You couldn't have!"

Balthazar roared out laughing and slapped Chuck's knee with a loud smack, "That's just it, man! I _wish_ I was lying…I just…" he paused to gasp in breath as he tried to push back his laughter to try and finish.

Castiel felt the corners of his lips curling even more as he saw the open happiness on his brother's face. It had been so long since he had seen him so relaxed.

"You know, we'd all just got kicked out of the building, something about it being government property, and we were all still completely plastered and now without a place to hang. We had to do something!"

"But, naked? Really?" Chuck asked, his voice in a whisper like it was forbidden to speak of such things above a certain volume.

Balthazar roared again, "Naked! Of course! The most fun things in the 'verse are all done naked, and anything else fun can be even more fun if naked. Just picture it, Chuckie…" he held his hand in the air as if it would reveal a picture before them, "hopscotch…"

Chuck looked at the open air before them in awe, "So, the feds showed up?" he prodded, wanting to hear the rest of the story.

"Ah, well, there were no feds…until I started singing."

They both broke out laughing again, but in between his chuckles, Balthazar was still trying to speak, "This-this story was not," an undignified snort, "meant to be funny when I told Cassy... and my little fourteen year old brother had to scrape me off the sidewalk. When I had finally found my feel and purged my stomach I told him very seriously that-that is was a morality tale about the evils of moonshine. I told him this while hunched over a toilet! I swear he was about to pull out some paper to take notes! Such a literal child!"

Castiel watched them shyly smiling as he recalled that morning, but the smile fell as suddenly the whole world seemed to zoom in on his brother and the sadness and regret swimming in the back of his eyes.

"_I would be there right now, with my friends and no cares in the world, and Cassy would still be the little brother I knew and loved. Not the pathetic stranger and freak I see now. It hurts to look at him now."_

Castiel flinched and felt himself fleeing from the room, somehow the horrible words being masked in happy laughter, "I mean it was…it was either that, or I would sing the Garrison anthem. I'm not entirely sure…the reports were quite varied and Cassy said he couldn't recognize the tune."

* * *

He felt unbalanced as he continued on, again not even aware of where he was headed. The only thing that kept him from floating away completely was the soft touch of his hand on the wall as he moved along.

Then the texture of the metal wall panels changed and he knew he had arrived in the dining area where the sounds of dishes clinking in the sink was heard. Bobby stood at the water, washing the dishes from lunch while Meg was seated at the table sharpening her knives. She was looking up at Bobby with something akin to sympathy and disbelief.

"So like…never?"

Bobby was blushing hard and scrubbing perhaps a bit too hard at one of the plastic plates, "Well, no…Some orders allows Sheppard's to marry, but I just didn't end up so lucky I suppose."

Meg looked at bit confused, "But…you still get the urge, right? They don't…cut it off or nothing?"

The plate he was washing was dropped into the sink with a plop, "I'm still very much intact, thank you," he huffed and threw a wet rag at her face. It was a sign of how much respect Meg had for the preacher that she didn't throw one of her knives in response, but then again, she had been behaving herself since that whole mess on Ariel…

Then just like before it was like Meg was suddenly amplified and her voice filtered out from the air.

"_Gotta keep a happy face or I'll be out of a job. Don't be stupid and just wait for the next opportunity. Don't let the money distract me or that freak will kill me. And I thought I was a demon…these guys have no idea I'm just a kitten compared to our wolf in sheep's wool."_

Castiel frowned and stepped back from the table in shame. Hesitantly he glanced up at Bobby, the kind caring soul that was trying his best to help him, but Bobby wasn't even looking at Castiel. Still he heard the preacher's voice ring out as clear as if it was in his head.

"_I don't give half a hump if you're innocent or not. Can't stand to see those two boys hurt more. So where the hell does that put you?"_

With a pain in his gut like he had been punched, he backed out of the room as the sounds suddenly came back at full volume, like everything else had been on mute. The dishes continued to clink innocently in the sink, and Meg's wet stone slid up and down the knife in smooth strokes.

He didn't want to stay in that room any longer. Both of them felt so stifled…

* * *

He let himself be pulled down the corridor, not at all in protest. He didn't want to remain in that room for a moment longer. He couldn't be cross with Meg as he had thought the same thing himself many times. They had no idea…

He floated on the drift until he came to the hallway outside of the control room where he felt the presence of Gabriel and Sam. He was made to pause outside of the door, not at all noticed by the pair, but then again, they were a bit distracted.

Sam was seated in the pilots' chair, and the pilot seated on him. They were both still fully clothed, but that didn't deter from the passion and love between them as they sat entwined as they touched and kissed.

Castiel stood entranced by it. Normally he would have turned away to give them privacy, but whatever was happening today was different. Their shared emotions did more than leak into Castiel's mind. This time it leaked into his being, and for a moment he was consumed by the gentle lust and love. He felt the tingle in Sam's gut, the breathlessness of Gabriel, the warmth shared.

They weren't thinking of their brothers at all for once. That part of their mind that housed Castiel and Dean was for once quiet. It was a foreign feeling that should have pleased Castiel, but instead it made him feel somewhat empty. They were so happy together…

He wasn't needed here, so he floated away.

* * *

Castiel drifted past the infirmary when he heard footsteps above him. He glanced up, somehow seeing and hearing everything that was transpiring on the floor above, where Anna's shuttle was. Perhaps he was a ghost. The thought didn't bother him as much as it should have.

The strange cold numbness that had enveloped him since he had "awoken" warmed a bit at seeing Dean where he was pacing the shuttle floor in front of a somewhat agitated Anna on the couch. They had this same conversation before it seemed, going by the amount of times both of them were rolling their eyes.

"It's not a threat, Dean. They just think that I have lost my way and they want to give me time to…re-set."

"You mean, re-program! Anna, you can't let them rule your life like this!"

"Dean, this is what I signed on for long before I met any of you. It's my life."

Dean growled, "You have a life here! You said so yourself! You have always been one of us, one of the crew. Would it kill you to not spread for a spell and think about a career change? You wouldn't have to pretend anymore, think about it!"

Anna sighed, actually letting a bit of anger show on her delicate features, "This is who I am, Dean. I don't want to go. I really don't, but I'll lose so much if I stay. I have status, I have friends in high places…what good am I to the crew without that?"

"I've told you before, that doesn't matter. We'll find you something to do on the ship," but Dean knew from having this same argument ten times before, Anna wasn't about to become a criminal because Dean wished it so.

"_It's only a matter of time…I can't lose anything else I love. I lost Pamela because I rebelled. It's only a matter of time…. before this family is ripped apart. I can't stay here to see it. I can't stay here to see how it will kill you when Castiel is gone…it's only a matter of time."_

Dean's angry face was suddenly lax and dead looking as the universe dipped out of focus again, his voice drifting through the air even though his lips never moved.

"_Keep the family together. You can only trust family. If you lose them, you'll have no one. You'll be alone again, left if the darkness and darkness you'll become. Look out for your family, Dean."_

The desperation that wrapped around Dean's frame was squeezing him like a pincer and Castiel felt his own chest constrict painfully, cutting off his breath. He staggered back, confused and dizzy. He had to leave now and he opened his eyes to see that he was no longer in the shuttle. He let himself be pulled along.

* * *

He knew he was in the cargo hold when he felt the change of floor grating to cold and smooth panels. His had closed his eyes, hoping that he wouldn't see anything else. It was getting to be too much for him to handle. All he wanted to do was curl up in his and Dean's bed and hide under the covers until the rest of the 'verse disappeared. He just wanted it to be quiet.

He trusted whatever force that was moving him along to keep him from bumping into any crates as he was led across the hold. He absently felt the smooth surface beneath him, odd since he wasn't entirely sure he still had feet, but then he stepped on something and it cracked loudly, echoing over the whole room.

Slowly he pried his eyes open to see an old dead branch on the ground, smashed in the center where Castiel had crushed it. He bent down to trace a finger over it, wondering when the last time was that he saw a tree. What was this branch doing here?

He stood up and looked around to maybe find a clue or answer. Instead he found himself staring at the floor of the hold where red and brown dead and decaying leaves were scattered everywhere, dead branches strewn in random places…

He felt his heartrate increase and he frantically went to touch a few of the leaves and other branches, not sure if what he was seeing was real or not, but they all cracked and crinkled in the right places. How could this be?

He picked up a branch and held it against his chest like a child would a stuffed animal. He was surrounded by dying things, still clinging to the last bits of life. Spring had been that somewhat cold, but getting warmer time when he first arrived. Then came the summer, so wonderful and full of life, hope and happiness. Was it time for fall already? Was it all coming to an end? How could he ever survive the winter?

"It's just an object. It doesn't mean what you think…" he choked out, trying to convince himself he was wrong. This wasn't what was to come. This couldn't be…

The universe suddenly swam back again, full volume and making his head swim at the sudden change. He felt his feet again, he knew where he was. Nothing was dragging him anywhere…but it was so loud! All around him the crew was shouting and surrounding him. Where had they come from?! Why were they so scared? Why were they yelling?! It was all jumbled together and he was overwhelmed, unsure who to look at first or where to go. He was no longer being led and he almost wished that someone else was in control of him again because he just didn't know where to go.

Balthazar was off to his left, eyes wide and terrified as he inched closer, for whatever reason not coming closer than an arm reach away, "Cassy, you know that's not to be touched…" he shouted, his voice verging on panic.

"Stop yelling at him, That's only going to make it worse," Sam tried to state calmly, but in keeping his voice low by example his words were lost on the others.

"Cas, son, it's alright—" Bobby's voice came from behind making him twirl around and almost lose his balance. He squeezed the branch tighter in his hands.

"Cassy-bear, please. Just…please." Gabriel sounded like he was about to cry.

Then Dean stepped into frame, deep sadness in his eyes covered by stabbing panic, "Cas! Please, don't hurt yourself. Just put it down. You're in no danger, I promise."

Cas was just confused, why would Dean think he was going to hurt himself? Or that he felt threatened. He was home wasn't he? He turned to Chuck and Anna who were both standing back from the chaos. They both startled when he met their eyes and they each stepped back, fear evident in their expressions and body language. They were scared of him?

Their eyes were on his hands and he looked down, expecting to find the branch he had found, but instead he found a gun, a simple pistol, but it was loaded and the safety was off. He looked at it in awe and bewilderment and then glanced around the hold, noting that all of the leaves had disappeared.

"Cassy, what were you thinking? How did you get ahold of that?" Balthazar pleaded.

"Don't yell at him!" Dean hissed, but he was looking at Castiel, waiting for an answer.

"It…it was in my hand. I was asleep…I was asleep. I was awake."

He saw Dean's eyes slam shut as if he was punched in the stomach. That wasn't what he wanted to hear apparently. Castiel shrank back ashamed and hugged himself tightly, suddenly feeling very cold. The gun awkwardly bumped his side.

Dean had opened his eyes again, looking decidedly very pale as he reached his hand forward. He was also inching forward warily, like he was approaching a wild animal. It made Castiel shrink back more, flinching like he was about to be struck.

His eyes were wide and worried, "You're angry, why are you angry?"

"I'm not angry! I just… Just let me…" he closed the last few feet in a second and snatched away the gun from his hands. Castiel barely noticed. He was just too confused.

Dean felt the gun in his hand, noting the weight and knowing that it was fully loaded, and of course the safety was off too. Meg was next to him and took not of the same thing.

"Oh man. Crazy guy and a gun ready to go? That's a recipe for unpleasantness as most would think," she commented lightly. Everyone wanted to growl back at her, but they knew she was right.

"Cas? Do you understand how bad this is?" Dean asked forcibly.

"He understands. He doesn't comprehend."

"Right. Well, I'm glad we've made that distinction. No touching guns, capiche?"

"Yeah, I capiche."

He was suddenly filled with a deep anger as he looked at all the frightened and concerned faces around him. He just couldn't get it right. No matter what he did or didn't do, there would always be people scared of him, worried about him…it would never be quiet. There were just too many damn voices now.

He moved quickly out of the hold, roughly pushing by the wall of people who tried to stop him.

"Cas!" he heard Dean and his brothers call, but he didn't stop to listen.

"It's getting very, very crowded!" he shouted back over his shoulder. He had to get away from them. It was too much. The engine room called to him.

* * *

Sorry if that chapter was a bit confusing, but without the magic of camera work, it was kinda hard to describe what was going on. But anyway! That was tragic :D


	3. Chapter 3

Notes: Plot! Plot! Plot!

guest: Apologies! Hang in there though! *GROUP FANDOM HUG!* XD I think we all need it right now.

Disclaimer: As if...

* * *

CHAPTER 3

Dean let him go. Every fiber in his being screamed at him to chase after Cas, but something held him back this time. Maybe he was crowding him? He had been trying so damn hard to not let his own emotions build up, to not worry, just to save Cas some of the burden, but maybe he had just been making things worse all along. It was like telling someone to not think about elephants, of course leading to them thinking about nothing _but _elephants. He was _trying_ though. Damn, he was trying.

Next to him he heard Sam blow out a harsh breath and knew without looking that his brother was running a hand through his hair. Something he did when stuff got real.

"Jeez, I thought he was on the mend," Sam commented shakily. Indeed, that was what a lot of them had thought. Pain and riddles aside, they hadn't worried much about Cas messing around with weapons since that one time he took a slash at Meg's chest, but Meg was a bitch so they had let it slide. Hell, they had handed Cas butt-loads of guns and ammo at their last job and nobody really cared, right? It was just seeing him with a locked and loaded pistol, looking so lost and unaware that caught them all off guard. There was no rhyme or reason to him having a weapon right then. Why did he have it?

Bobby also huffed out at breath and cast a sympathetic glance at Dean and the Novaks, "Well, his medications have been erratic as of late. And we know there aren't any drugs that his system can't eventually break down, but it could be something else entirely. There is no telling what's going on anymore. Those scans we took aren't live photos anymore. We're right back where we were guessing at what's going on inside...Dean, has his back healed from his fall through the roof?"

Dean shrugged, "Not really, no. But I talked about it with him. He doesn't think it's because of the fall."

Sam frowned, "He doesn't? What does he think it is?"

"He won't tell me. He just veers off into a new topic or tells me that he's fine and he can handle it. "

A loud snort came from Meg where she angrily gestured to the gun in Dean's hands, "So what? We're just gonna sit around and wait for your wounded puppy is going to go all Mr. Hyde on us and shoot us all in our beds? I got cut up last time his pain got bad! I'm not going to just let that happen again. Open your eyes, boys! He may be cute and fluffy on the outside, but like the preacher said, we have no idea what's going on inside."

Sam and Gabriel both bristled and the younger Winchester got right up in Meg's face, jumping to the defense of the person that his brother and partner loved more than anything, "Hey, back off! Cas is one of us and you would do well to remember that he is a victim, not the enemy."

"We've seen victim turn monster before, Sam! Or do none of you remember that little Croat accident," she noticed Gabriel's eyes glint dangerously and Dean tense up like he was about to pounce, "Okay, I'm not saying that he'll turn into that, but my point is that he had a gun today and could have easily shot someone while he was off in la-la land thinking that he was just tossing a snowball. He could have shot Sam, or you Dean. And if he shot someone in the head, you think that either of them could heal that?! Hell, what if he had shot Gabriel? We'd be down a healer and even more screwed."

"ALRIGHT! We get it, Meg! We are all well aware of what could have happened here today. We're not just going to ignore this. We'll figure something out, we always do," Balthazar tried to reason, panic rising like the bile in his throat. He saw the reason and logic in her argument, not that he agreed, but some of the others in the crew might. He wasn't ready to face having to leave another home.

"Fine. But you all better keep on your tippy toes, cause we're deep in fucking space. Corner of No and Where. You guys take extra care with him, cause we are very very much alone out here," Meg warned before storming out of the hold. She headed to her room where she would grab a knife and small pistol to stick in her jeans. She wasn't taking any risks. She wasn't blinded like the rest of them.

The others watched her go before Chuck and Anna both drifted off to let the Novaks and Winchesters have some privacy to talk. Bobby stayed behind though, knowing that they boys would have questions.

"So what do we do?" Balthazar asked hesitantly.

"I dunno. I don't even know where to start," Gabriel moaned, sitting down heavily on a nearby crate and burying his face in his hands.

"We could start by asking him what his dream was about."

Everyone looked to Bobby.

"What do you mean?"

The preacher shrugged, "He muttered something before, that he was asleep, he was awake…sounds to me like he's started sleep walking. Maybe he felt threatened in his dream and got the gun for that reason."

"That was sleep walking!? Are you kidding me? He never did that when we were growing up!" Balthazar shouted.

"Well, in his case, being all psychic and such, I'm sure that there is more to it than simple sleepwalking. I'm just saying that his _visions_ and such usually hold meaning. We can't forget that while we all act like chickens with our heads cut off. Meg might be a paranoid bitch, but I'm an even more paranoid bastard. If he felt threatened in a dream, maybe we should be a little threatened as well."

"Of what though? I mean, I hate to say it but we are kinda alone out here," Sam reasoned.

Nobody had an answer to that.

"Well, whatever it is, we do need to keep an eye on Cas. Chuck will keep an eye on him in the engine room till dinner. He should be calmed down by then and Gabriel, Dean or I can try to get him to open up," reasoned Balthazar. It seemed like a decent enough plan to go with for now. At least it would give Dean the time to think things over.

* * *

Outside of the Impala, hovering just far enough away to be unseen, was a small dart ship. It's trajectory was latched on to the cargo ship as it slowly edged closer and closer, waiting for the right moment to swoop in. It wouldn't be long now. Soon he would have his prize.

A hand covered in black leather pulled out an old folder, bent out of shape from overuse. He flipped it open and thumbed through a few of the pages inside. It had taken him months to compile these notes. It was one of the hardest cases he had taken on, but damn did he like a challenge.

The first page he flipped to was the wanted poster of a young man, Castiel Novak, as the black and bold name was read. There were a few notes about where he had come from, family relations, but there were a ridiculous amount of holes in the police reports he had obtained. For a case he had spent months on, the contents of his folder were miniscule at best. Hell, from what he had gathered, the boy was a Garrison golden boy who would someday take over his family's business, then all of a sudden he had just turned. There were no actual reports on what the boy was wanted for. All it would tell him about the man was that he was incredibly dangerous and that once caught, he should be turned in to the highest authority, not normal police. Odd. But again, he liked a challenge. This could be the ultimate hunt for him.

He flipped past the wanted posters of the other two Novaks. They were small game compared to their magnificent baby brother. They weren't worthy of his attention. Flipping further back he spotted the three photos that he had obtained on his own.

The first was of the three brothers when they were young. According to his records, it was taken only a month before the eldest brother had taken off. They were all huddled together in front of what looked like an old oak tree, the middle brother's arm held out awkwardly as he held up the camera to capture the three of them. They wore smiles and their eyes all crinkled the same way. They didn't look too much like each other as far as siblings went, but they all shared sort of elvin features. This picture was next to useless, but he kept it to remind him that Castiel must love his brothers a lot. He could use that against his target. This photo was misleading though, in that he was hunting nothing more than a little brown quail bird, but if what the reports said were true, this would be more like hunting down a hawk. Highly evasive and clever bird with all those sharp talons and screeching wails.

The next photo was damned hard to get. He had to kill two men to get his hands on it. His sources told him that it was taken while his prey was at some Garrison program that he had run away from. It showed him in a white cell, dressed in scrubs. He was pressed as far back into the corner of the room as he could possibly be. His hair was a wild mess compared to the carefully parted locks from the first photo. But what really stood out were his eyes. They were glaring up at whoever was taking the photo. His eyes weren't like a normal cornered animal like a dog or rodent, where it would be filled with blind terror. In this, it was like his eyes were glowing with such hate and fierceness that it looked like he would charge if not for the obvious walls of the cell in between him and the photographer. He knew he should be on his guard then when he was finally able to corner his prey.

The final photo he pulled out was a security camera shot. It showed his prey as he walked under the arm of a taller man, Dean Winchester he had found out, through a space port only a few weeks back. It had been a damned lucky find, one that was like a sign from God that Castiel was meant to be his, that this wanted criminal was supposed to be found. His face in this photo look hesitantly happy, comfortable even under the close proximity of another man. This was even more important data as he took in the protective stance and fierce gaze of the Captain who held his prey. Seemed that his little hawk had a guardian. That might prove more difficult, but he had his ways.

He closed the file with a sigh and slid it back beside his pilot's chair. He sat back and watched the Impala float along peacefully. It wouldn't be long now.

He glanced once at the one personal item he kept on his ship, a very old and worn photo of a young woman hugging a dog. He looked upon it without emotion and then turned his attention back to his prey. Soon.

* * *

Ta da! Getting the ball rolling in this story! I just hope that I can finish this story before I get shipped off to my job!


	4. Chapter 4

Notes: Gotta. Finish. My. Paper. But. Need. To. Post. Chapter. Ha!...now back to my paper...

leahelisabeth: I bet you know who it is, you being psychic and all XD I also had this person lined up from the very start when I first came up with the idea for the series. *sniff sniff* finally seeing it come to fruition*

Eri: Yay, someone else who caught the Buffy stuff! *hearts* :D Drusilla was the shiz. And for the intruder, all shall be revealed...eventually! ;)

Disclaimer: Can barely afford tuition...

* * *

CHAPTER 4

_The rustle of the leaves as they blew with the slight breeze woke Gabriel where he had fallen asleep under the tree in his back yard. For a moment he just stared up at the sky between the branches and green leaves, feeling the sun warm his skin. He could hear nearby the sounds of little Castiel and Balthazar playing in the grass. _

_Balthazar was probably trying to get the toddler to walk again, but Castiel would just sit and giggle while Balthazar would call his name again and again, propping him up on fat wobbly legs and trying to get them to hold steady. No matter how many times his brother tried to get him to stand, Castiel would just flop back to the ground, laughing hysterically and thinking it was all some silly game. Poor Balthazar would have to wait a few more months before he would get Castiel to walk, and even longer before the kid was old enough to play catch with him, but Gabriel wouldn't tell him that. It was too much fun to see the failed attempts and hear Castiel gurgle his little baby laugh. It was so nice to be home. He wondered when Sam would get back…_

_Sam?_

_Gabriel's eyes opened wide as he took in his surroundings, suddenly everything seemed too bright, distorted, wrong. This wasn't his home…was it? It felt like home, but then…where was Sam and the rest of the crew? The Impala? _

_He looked over to where his brothers were still playing in the grass, but instead of seeing to happy young children, he saw Balthazar trying to get a limp Castiel to stand. There were tears streaming down Balthazar's face as he screamed out Castiel's name over and over, telling him to get up. To get up and run with him. They had to leave._

_Castiel was like a doll in his arms, face blank and completely expressionless and body unmoving save for the jostling from his brother. His knees wouldn't lock and just folded beneath him weakly. He wasn't running anymore. He wouldn't run with Balthazar. All the life was drained from him, no laughter, no giggling, no emotion…_

_Gabriel didn't know why, but he looked back up into the tree above him and saw that the branches had gone bare, all the leaves were dead at his feet. A warm breeze that had been blowing turned frigid and puffs of air could be seen coming out of his mouth as winter appeared. The sun was gone, covered by thick endless gray clouds. _

_Gabriel needed to get his brothers inside before they got sick. Before they were seen. He hoped that Sam had thought to bring a jacket. _

_He stumbled over to his brothers, Castiel now lying on the ground, looking nothing more than a corpse at their feet. He was too tired. Balthazar had seemed to run out of energy and was doubled over trying to catch his breath. _

"_Go, I'll be fine. You two need to stay warm. I'll just bring in the chill." Castiel muttered from the now snowy ground, his face turning blue as ice crystals formed in his hair. _

"_Castiel. You'll die," Balthazar said, but there was no emotion in his voice._

"_They won't let me go. They'll never let me go. Now, leave me."_

"_Cassy, I can't."_

"_Then I'll go," and Castiel pulled himself from the ground and started to walk away out into the snow storm that had blown in. It looked like he was walking into a land of white. Gabriel looked down at his hand where ice crystals like the ones on his youngest brother were forming on the skin. Slowly they began to spread up his arm._

"_I'll go with you, Castiel. I fear that I will bring in the cold as well."_

_He moved toward the white, hand in hand with Castiel while they heard Balthazar screaming behind them, calling out both of their names. Then another voice joined them._

"_Gabe? Gabe! Gabriel!"_

"_Sam?"_

"Wake up, Gabriel! You're dreaming!"

His eyes shot open and he almost fell out of the pilot's chair he had been sitting in as he was roughly shaken back to reality by a concerned Sam standing over him, frown evident on his face. Gabriel ran a shaking hand over his face, feeling the damp skin where he must have been sweating buckets.

"Jesus, Gabe. You're skin is like ice," he heard Sam mutter and he tensed up as the last tendrils of the dream filtered into memory. He shook his head violently to rid those thoughts and ran his hands up and down his arms to get some friction going to warm him up.

"Sorry, just…always kinda chilly in this room, ya know?"

"I guess…"

"How's your leg doing?" Gabriel asked, hoping against hope to avoid the interrogation he saw brewing in Sam's eyes.

Sam shrugged, "Aches a bit, but should be fine in a few days. Not bad though for falling down three floors."

"Indeed! Gravity, thou art a heartless bitch."

Sam nodded absently in agreement and there was a brief pause before the younger man jumped them right back to the topic Gabriel so did not want to talk about, "That was some dream you must have been having. You were twitching enough that I thought you were going to fall right out of the chair."

"Well, you know how active and amazing my imagination is. And uh, don't tell Dean I fell asleep on duty. He's walking on edge and I wouldn't put it past him to freak the freak out," Gabriel asked, lips pouting as if Dean had already scolded him.

Sam took in the sweaty features, the cold skin and the wild look in Gabriel's eyes and knew something was up, but Gabriel wasn't just tricky in his pranks. He was just as good as hiding away his thoughts and even memories. He wouldn't be getting a thing out of the pilot unless he wanted it that way.

Sam sighed heavily and sat back on his haunches from where he had been bent over Gabriel to try and wake him, "Dean won't freak. He knows that you and Cas have been worn thin for mojo like a favorite pair of boxers. He'd understand if you had to take a little nap. I can fill in for you if you need to go sleep some more."

The pilot shook his head quickly, not at all wanting to go back to dreamland anytime soon, "Nah, I'm fine," he glanced up at Sam, "I'm…I'm happy."

"Happy? Really? With everything that's been going on today?" Sam's eyebrows rose to his hairline in surprise. Gabriel had to laugh at the open shock on his face.

"Sammy, I know I told you before that I didn't think that we could be happy while Castiel is…how he is, but you're here, I'm here, my brothers and everyone else is here. We have a home and our freedom…I'm _am _happy. And I've been thinking about what you had brought up last week. About us getting all official? You still in for that?" Gabriel asked hopefully.

"I thought that you wanted to wait until Cas was better. I won't be mad if you do, I get it, I do. I don't want to rush this if you're not into it."

He winced at that and turned to glance absently at the data screens around him, noting that the nav. screen seemed to have a glitch again as something fizzled in and out of sight. He would bug Chuck about it later, "If we wait for Cas to be better…this may never happen for us. The Host really fucked him up, and Dean and Balthazar have been doing a great job getting him back on his feet, but there are some scars that never completely heal, some memories that never fade. He'll be haunted by this for the rest of his life no matter what pains we can take away. I…I know this, Sam. So we just have to live however we can, hopefully happily, and do our best to work with what we've got."

It sounded almost like Gabriel had lost hope, and that killed Sam a bit because if Gabriel was thinking it, maybe Dean was thinking the same thing. Not to mention that Gabriel was more than likely talking about himself and what Sam could never heal for him. Nothing Sam could say or do would take away Gabriel's time at the host, just like Dean couldn't do that for Cas. On the other hand, maybe Gabe was right, and that they just had to work with what they had, or what they will have once they got this whole marriage thing underway...

Sam sighed and sat heavily down in the other chair, propping his large feet up on the control panel and glanced out at the stars. It used to be sort of disorienting to look out a window and always see stars even when it was the middle of the day, but he had gotten used to it over time. Still, every once in a while he would see outside and startle a little, wondering why he hadn't gotten ready for bed yet. Maybe that was just because of how tired they all felt all the time now.

"Cas seems to be more colorful by the moment, though. I'm worried about what might happen next," Gabriel muttered softly, the fear hidden in his voice. Sam couldn't blame him for being a little scared. What happened today was indeed something to be alarmed over. Meg wasn't wrong in that the day could have ended very differently.

Sam glanced over at the pilot and shrugged, "He could either try to sing again or rub soup in our hair. It's a toss-up."

Gabriel seemed to consider this, peering into the air in front of him contemplatively, "Hmm, I hope he does the soup thing. It's always a hoot, and we don't all blow out our eardrums and bleed out our skulls," he joked back, happy that someone else shared his twisted sense of humor. For him, the only way to make something horrendous and terrifying be bearable in his mind, was to laugh about it. It had worked well enough. He hadn't cried himself to sleep in years.

"Poor guy, though."

"Yeah….He's definitely got….funny…."

Sam frowned at Gabriel who was squinting at the nav. screen, "What's up? You've been staring at that thing a lot."

"I'm just getting a weird blip. Must be a heat-bounce off our wake or something…"

"Maybe it's engine flux?" Sam suggested, also seeing the blip that appeared on the screen. Gabriel shrugged.

"I'll ask Chuck about it tomorrow. Maybe he—"

"Those lockers are sealed! The only way that he can get in there is if he knows the combination!" Dean 's voice echoed through the hall as he and Meg pounded into the control room. Both of them looked about ready to blow if the twin annoyed expressions were anything to go by. Meg was practically purple.

"I don't leave my guns around, Dean! And I certainly don't leave them loaded. Why do I have to be punished too! You have no right to take away my weapons when your little box of giggles and straightjackets is on a rampage."

Dean whirled and got in her face so fast that she almost fell over, "Well, somehow he got his hands on one of _your_ guns! Just think what would have happened if he had gotten his hands on "Jane" your prized killing machine! He could have gotten hurt!"

Meg rolled her eyes, "Let's just move this conversation in the not-Meg's-fault direction? I didn't make him crazy! Hell, I didn't even want him on the ship!"

This time it was Gabriel and Sam who glared at Meg. The older Novak practically steaming as he spoke in a soft and deadly voice, "Is that really the direction you want to go in?" he asked venom in his voice that confused Dean, but he appreciated the enthusiastic back-up. Whatever the pilot had said, it made Meg tense up and glance at the floor, almost like she was afraid. Odd.

"I just don't want to take a lashing for something I'm not the cause of," she bit out, not looking at the pilot or Dean. The floor seemed to be what she wanted to focus on at the moment. That suited Dean just fine as he watched all her spit and fire die out. He glanced at Sam and Gabriel and nodded in greeting, and maybe a little at bringing Meg in on what might have been a tender moment.

Sam nodded back, "So, where's Cas at now?"

"In the nest. Balthazar is nearby…just in case."

"We going to start bolting that door from the outside from now on?" Meg suggested. Seemed logical in her opinion.

Sam frowned, "A little extreme, isn't it? He proven time and time again that he would fight to protect us. I really don't think he has any intention of hurting anyone on this ship."

Meg sneered at him, earning a growl from Dean and Gabriel, "Well, last time I checked I was on this ship too. Or are we all going to forget him coming at me with a knife?"

"Oh, fond memories and wacky fun," Gabriel sighed wistfully.

"You wanna go, little man?"

"Only if it's someplace with candlelight," Gabriel replied flippantly. Sam chuckled and turned to his brother.

"Dean, we all know that Cas is…unpredictable, but I don't think he'd harm anyone."

"Knife!" Meg pushed, but she was ignored by everyone.

"I don't think so either, Sam. Hell, we really shouldn't be freaking out that much anyway. I mean, did any of you guys see him shooting back at the bordello? Couldn't even get one bottle down."

They all smiled at the memory in relief. That was some comfort at least.

"Um, I'm not so sure about that, Captain…"

Chuck and Anna both stepped into the control room after disappearing from the hold earlier. Dean had meant to go check on them to see if they were still spooked, but the pale and wide eyed features of both of them told Dean that they were indeed still a little shaken from the events of today.

"Chuck? You got something to say?"

The mechanic swallowed hard and nodded. He couldn't look Dean in the eyes, and while that was normal, Anna being unable to was unheard of. His heart clenched in his chest.

"Well? What's going on?"

* * *

Aw, shiz. This episode is gonna be all full of feels ain't it...


	5. Chapter 5

Notes: Okay, had my last classes of the semester and now it's finals week! Oma good golly gosh I'm freaking, but it's a good kind of freak cause I know the end is nigh!

leahelisabeth: Oh, man! We'll see if you're psychic soon enough XD In the next few chapters I believe!

Disclaimer: I can't even keep the plant I cloned in my lab alive (I brought it home and my cat ate it! Crying!). I really don't think you want to put me in charge of anything else.

* * *

CHAPTER 5

The dart ship drifted closer and closer until it was like a mosquito bussing around the Impala, looking for the best place to break in. With a few short flips of some switches, the dart was synced up with the Impala and would remain only ten feet away from its hull until his hunt was completed. He quickly donned his space suit and helmet and descended out of the bottom of his ship. Glancing behind him, he gauged the distance between his ship and the Impala and then kicked off from the dart to drift those few feet down to the surface of the cargo ship, landing gently and without a single noise.

As well trained as he was at keeping his cool, that little jump always got his heart beating just a little but faster. It was a damned scary thing to miss your target. You could end up drifting out in the black, alone and cold without any hope of being rescued. It was always a toss up as to how you might die first. Freezing to death, suffocating, or even implosion if the pressure in your suit was compromised. At least there was never enough oxygen to allow for starving to death.

Now gripping firmly to the hull, he crawled his way down one side to glance in one of the windows. It was little more than five inches of transparent glass, but he could see right into what looked like a dining area. He took in the faces he saw there.

* * *

From where he was laying on his bed, Castiel's eyes popped open with a gasp and he sat up quickly. Something was wrong.

* * *

The crew had moved to the dining area, where Bobby was still cleaning up from the last meal. He took in their drawn features and pulled out a few plastic tumblers. Looked like they were in for a serious conversation.

They all sat around the table, except for Dean who paced around the room, unable to sit still while fear started to creep up his being. Chuck being nervous was just fine dandy and normal, but Anna's fearful expression had him more than a bit worried. What did they know about Cas that he didn't?

Impatient to get it over with, Dean took a sip of the offered tumbler of whiskey and turned to his mechanic and Companion, "Okay, you two. Why don't you speak your piece?"

Chuck took a shuddering breath before starting, "It w-was when you and Sam w-were taken by Dick Roman…"

Many in the room shuddered at that, the Winchesters and Gabriel more than the rest. They weren't likely to forget about that anytime soon. Gabriel's hand fell to Sam's knee where he squeezed, and Sam returned the comfort with a hand gently placed on top. Dean wouldn't admit it out loud, but he wished for a moment that Cas was there to offer some comfort as well, just a touch to his shoulder was all he needed.

"…Well, as you were probably told, we all went in. Me, Anna and Cas were supposed to hold the line at the ship. He was given a pistol to help out."

"So? From what I saw before we left was Cas just hiding behind a crate, not even touching the gun in his lap," Gabriel commented. He remembered how freaked out he was then as he and Sam were setting up to rescue Dean. Gabriel had also been more than a little concerned about having Castiel so close to the fighting. If he hadn't been so damned distracted, he probably would have taken the time to lock Cas in his room where he would be safe and not near so much death.

Anna picked up from there, "He was like that…at first. But then we got pretty badly pinned down and there were five or so men coming at us, and we couldn't…" she paused and sucked in a steadying breath, "he was counting down for a while, and then a- a grenade dropped on us."

Dean and Gabriel both tensed up at that. A grenade. Dean had seen the damage that those things could cause to the human body. The fact that one had dropped in on three of his people was just him finding out that one of his worst nightmares had actually happened.

Anna seemed unable to continue at that point as the memory of what had happened played out in her mind, clearly causing her immense distress. Chuck patted her delicate hand gently and spoke up again, his voice cracking, "Cas didn't even flinch, he just picked up the grenade and continued to count," Dean choked back a distressed sound at Cas doing something so dangerous, "then he just tossed it back at them. As soon as he reached zero, it blew up and killed most of the men closing in on us."

Sam blew out a harsh breath, Bobby huffing next to him, "That's what you're freaked out about? We all know that Cas had weird predictions."

"But that wasn't it," Chuck defended, "he had his eyes shut tight the whole time and never looked up. Only a second after the explosion went off, he got up as bullets flew by him. He just stood there and lifted the pistol he had. And the men left shooting at us…they were real spread out, ya know? And they had pretty good cover, crates and the smoke from the grenade. Anna and I couldn't see 'em at all. And his eyes were closed!"

Dean felt dread rising as the story went on, sort of seeing where it was going, but not wanting to hear it, but he still stayed quiet.

Chuck was waving his arms frantically, his eyes comically wide as he recalled the events, "he let off three shots, only three…and then all the shooting stopped. He just stood there in plain sight. Everyone that had been pinning us down was dead."

There was a moment of stunned silence as they all absorbed the story.

"He-he shot them? My baby brother?" Gabriel asked quietly, a piece of horror in his voice. It wasn't every day that someone was told that the baby boy that he had practically raised had killed men in such a way.

Anna nodded, "All of them. Dead in an instant with his eyes closed."

From her seat at the table, Meg whistled, "Well, that's fucked up. Can I have my guns back now?" Everyone ignored her.

Anna looked like she was clinging to the edges of shock, her eyes not really focusing on anything, "Nobody could have done something like that. Not Meg, Sam or even Dean. No one can shoot like that that's a person."

Dean bristled, "What? So Cas isn't a person? Is that it?" he growled at her, not at all sorry for how she fliched.

"Dean, please don't be mad. I'm just telling you what I saw—"

"Well that's nice for you! He was protecting you two and you're here calling him a monster!"

Chuck looked panicked, "We didn't say that!"

"No, but I'd say that Dean was thinking it," Meg smirked. That got Dean to freeze completely. Did he really think that? Or was it because of all those times that Cas had called himself a monster? He felt sick when he couldn't answer honestly either way.

"Dean, we both love Cas. Chuck still lets him stay in the engine room, I love having him around but…you didn't see him! Right after, he looked at us and…he looked so empty. Like he wasn't even there anymore," Anna pleaded with her friend, not liking how this seemed to be doing nothing more than tearing the Captain apart.

"Could be that Cas saved your lives. Maybe he didn't want to kill those men, but did it to keep you safe," Bobby reasoned.

"We're aware of that. We're not saying—"

"Maybe he didn't even know what was going on, like earlier today, you know?" Gabriel tried to defend, now desperate to hold on to his brother's innocence in this. He couldn't let the idea that the Host had really destroyed every last bit of Castiel's sweet and loving nature.

Meg snorted, "That's great, Tricky. Later on you can explain to me how that's a comfort. So can I have my guns back?"

Dean had been quiet for a minute, trying his best to process everything he was hearing. It had finally fallen silent as most in the room all waited to hear what he thought about everything, or maybe they were waiting for his motivating speech of denial. He was flying through his mind looking for any rational reason to explain all this and to comfort his frazzled crew. He hated to think what this would all do to Cas now that everyone was all freaked out. He just knew that it would kill Cas to know that those he cared about were scared of him.

Sam had been quiet mostly as well, but for a different reason all together. He hated to bring it up, especially since it would hurt Dean, but something like this had to be brought up. They needed to get all the information out in the open if they were going to find a way to fix this. Hiding things never went well for any of them.

"Uh, Dean? There's something else you should know…"

Dean looked up wearily and nodded at Sam, bracing himself when he saw his younger brother's reluctant expression.

"Back at the Bordello, I found Cas in the crow's nest."

"We know that. You said he was hiding out, like he didn't want to be around the shooting anymore."

"Well, logically we know that couldn't have been true. He knew that Jake was going to blast the floor, so why go up there in the first place? I didn't tell you before, but when I got up there…Cas was on the window plank and he had a rifle in his hand, aimed out the window," Sam finished and waited for a response from the others as they soaked in the new information.

"Did you see him actually shoot?" Bobby asked neutrally.

"No, but—"

"Wait…I remember right before the charges went off, ten of Burgess' men went down fast, like in rapid succession. Even Dean couldn't shoot that good and it sure wasn't one of the whores. That was Castiel, wasn't it," Meg said, for once no sneer or joke on her face. That was some impressive shooting she saw out there, and maybe she was actually a bit intimidated now.

Everyone fell silent again.

"Guys, this is Cas we're talking about," Dean turned to Sam, "Do you believe this? Sam?"

Sam opened his mouth to respond, but then shut it. He couldn't think of an honest answer that Dean would like. For a moment, Dean felt like he had been betrayed by his crew, that they were ganging up on him and Cas. He didn't know how to stop this, for all he knew Cas was already feeling the effects of this back in the nest and was crying his eyes out into an oblivious Balthazar's arms. There was no way to contain this now. Suddenly this getting 'feelings' and thoughts out in the open somehow seemed a whole lot worse than bottling them up.

He leaned on the table and looked each of them in the eye, "Okay, what we have here to deal with is the larger issue. And that issue is that…that you guys don't trust Cas anymore," a few tried to speak up in protest, but Dean held up his hand to stop them, "It isn't a question of whether we like him or not. I know that most of us have grown pretty damned attached to him. Anna, Chuck , I know you two would have spoken up sooner if you truly felt like there was a need. I'm grateful for you trying to hold back and hope for everything to clear up on its own, but now we can see that this might not happen…"

* * *

Outside the ship, the man held a small device up to the small window to listen in on the conversation. His smile faded as they continued to talk. This hunt was looking like it would be a lot easier than he thought.

* * *

"…There is nothing we can do now besides be cautious. I'm not putting this off, or ignoring the this because I'm particularly fond of Cas. I know he had an…oddness to him. And I'm not just talking about his new found proficiency with firearms. We all know that he knows things, that he sees things that he shouldn't, that he couldn't…"

"So we're back to witch trials?" Gabriel growled.

"We're calling him a witch now?"

Gabriel gave her a sneer, "Yes, Meg. He's a witch. He has had congress with the beast."

"He's in congress?"

"How did your brain even learn human speech? I'm just so curious?"

Meg sneered right back, "I only went to school for lunch."

"This isn't a joking matter," Anna cried out, "This is about our lives and Castiel's."

Dean nodded his gratitude to her, "What I'm trying to say here is, even though he is psychic—"

Meg cut back in, "So we're actually saying it out loud now? Not pretending that his little prophecies are completely normal?" Even Chuck was having a hard time of it and ran his hands through his tangled hair.

"Psychic… It sounds like something out of a science fiction novel," he muttered.

Sam gave him a look, "You live in a spaceship, Chuck."

"Oh, yeah."

Meg stood up from the table angrily and slammed her hands on the surface loudly, "So not only do I have to live with a ticking time bomb, but also a reader? I don't much like the idea of someone hearing what I'm thinking."

"No one likes the idea of hearing what you're thinking," Gabriel bit back.

Bobby had been absently rubbing at his scruffy beard, letting everyone's words roll around in his head, "The Garrison could have many uses for a psychic…or an assassin."

"But he's just a kid. All he wants is to be normal. It's what he's wanted all his life. He's always been that one on the sidelines, the one who would sit alone at lunch. This…this isn't his fault," Gabriel cried out, horrified that someone would claim that Castiel was nothing more than a human weapon. This was his baby brother.

"We all wish it was simple, but Cas was…changed by them. We don't know how much. We have…we have to start accepting that, Gabe."

Gabriel looked at Sam in horror.

"Yeah, well, if wishes were horses, we'd all be eating steak. What do we plan to do about this?" Meg hissed.

Gabriel turned frantically to Dean, "I swear he won't hurt any of us. Meg deserved it, I promise. He won't—"

Dean cut him off gently, "I know that, believe me, but I've got a whole crew to think about. As it is…I'm not going to make a decision on anything till I've thought it over and I've talked with Cas and Balthazar. Right now, it's late. Let's just get some rest."

They all drifted off after that. The ship fell quiet.

* * *

And all is revealed. Poor Cassy :(


	6. Chapter 6

Notes: Wow...finals week is really taking it all out of me. Sorry about the sporadic posts, but damn...this week has been crazy.

leahelisabeth: I know! Why am I so mean to Cassy!?

Disclaimer: I'm too tired to claim anything. Maybe later.

* * *

CHAPTER 6

His footsteps echoed off the walls loudly, which suited him just fine. He wanted the others to hear how agitated he was. He wanted them to know how much it pissed him off that now he had to go find Cas and tell him and Balthazar…everything. He had to warn someone who held his heart that next time he saw his 'family', they might just cower in fear. He had to watch as the happy light fizzled and died in his eyes as Cas' worst nightmare came to fruition and everyone he loved thought he was a monster. Well, this was all if Cas hadn't already caught a whiff on the stench of yellow pants. He might already be more than aware of what was going on.

He heard foot falls coming up quickly behind him and turned to see Sam chasing after him. For a moment Dean entertained the idea of just continuing on his way and ignoring Sam. It was a petty revenge for Sam bringing up the whole sniper thing, but Sam was just trying to help in his own way…by making them all paranoid as little old window watcher grandma's.

"Dean! Dean, hold up!"

With an epic roll of his eyes, Dean faced his brother, arms crossed defensively over his chest.

"What is it Sam? I'm in a little rush 'cause I need to check on my assassin," Dean bit out. At least Sam had the decency to duck his head in silent apology.

"Dean, please don't be mad. I had to say something. I'm looking out for the crew and _you._"

Dean let his arms drop wearily. He couldn't stay mad at Sam when he had those damned puppy eyes on full blast. He was completely honest it seemed, not that it made Dean feel any better over the whole situation. Cas was in store for a whole bunch of hurt he didn't deserve. Sam didn't deserve hurt too.

"Sammy…I'm not mad at you. I just...Cas loved this ship. I think it's more home to him than any place he's ever been. He's always talking about how she always is talking to him, singing to him, singing with him…He probably loves it as much as I do…well, maybe," he added with a fond smirk as he ran a hand over the wall. He wouldn't tell Sam this, but he had once asked Cas what the ship said to him when they talked. The answer had been Cas humming that octave for a good ten minutes. Dean didn't know it before then, but that hum was more soothing than a lullaby. He had never noticed it before, never realized that when he went to bed each night, that was the sound that he fell asleep to. God, he loved this ship.

"I know Cas loves this place, Dean. And I know that this whole thing is going to be a slap in the face for him, but…we'll all still be there for him. He'll have to feel that too, right?"

"He feels everything, Sam. He suffers every day because of us, because of all of our issues and paranoia. And we're just going to make it ten times worse with this. It's not like there is a balance in his head where we can balance out the bad with the good and he'll stay stable. It's more of a…junkyard. He could be walking around a maze of trash, lost in all the bad and only sometimes finding that odd little treasure of good. And trust me Sam, there is a shit ton of bad in his head. Sometimes I just…I just wish that they had just left him alone. That he wasn't…"

"But if Cas never went to the Host, you would have never met him."

Dean shook his head sadly, "Then maybe he wouldn't be hurting like this." Sam felt crushed at these words. Dean was suffering just as bad as Cas in all this. Dean continued, not noticing Sam's anguished expression, "I don't even know how I'm going to handle all of this, let alone how I'm going to tell him that he might have to start being locked up. I mean, he's my boyfriend! Not a freaking animal! We'll be no better than the Host."

"No. No, he's not an animal Dean."

They were interrupted as Bobby stepped into the hallway having finally finished the dishes in the kitchen. The preacher glanced up at the brothers and nodded shortly, "Good night, you two. Try to put your minds to rest until tomorrow."

Sam had wanted to say more, to give his brother as much comfort as he could without grasping at him in a strong hug, as tempted as he was to do so anyway, but Dean took the interruption from Bobby as an end to their conversation. He had already turned the other way and was heading down the hall.

"Dean…"

"Get some sleep, Sam. I know your leg is still bothering you," Dean called back without turning. Sam had to watch his brother walk away, hating that Dean felt he and Cas had to face this alone.

* * *

He took a deep breath to prepare himself before he hopped down the ladder into Cas' nest. He wasn't too sure what he expected to see, and he had two prominent ideas floating around in his mind. Of course, like he had told Sam, he thought that maybe what would be greeting him would be Castiel in a sobbing mess in Balthazar's arms as the stench of the crew's fear filtered down into the belly of the ship. Or, maybe Cas wouldn't have caught a whiff of it yet and would just be pruning his plant happily. A selfish part of Dean wanted Cas to already know, just to save himself the trouble of having to explain how his 'family' now all thought that Cas would go on a shooting rampage. He was never that lucky though.

He wasn't entirely sure of what to make of what he actually saw when he made it down the ladder. First he spotted Balthazar, causally slitting on Cas' bed while absently flipping through one of the quickly multiplying books. Balthazar gave the Captain a short nod in greeting when he took note of his arrival. He didn't look too concerned about anything, and Dean's stomach gave a lurch.

His eyes then sought out Cas, who was in one of the back corners, one hand held to the wall where he trailed his slender fingers over the surface. He seemed to be concentrating very hard on something.

Awkwardly, Dean cleared his throat to get the smaller man's attention, but he didn't even notice, or was ignoring him. Dean glanced over at Balthazar with a questioning look. Balthazar just shrugged and put the book down on the bed, not even bothering to save his place.

"I have no idea. Half hour ago he just got up from his plant and started to feel-up the walls. He hasn't stopped. I asked him what he was doing, and of course I received a pleasantly cryptic response," the middle Novak reported, shooting a somewhat disgruntled look over at his brother, "Dare I ask what everyone has been up to?"

"That's what I'm here for actually. There were some…concerns raised upstairs and I, uh, I really need to talk to Cas."

Balthazar caught the hesitance in the Captain's voice and tensed up, "Oh, well…did you need me to leave?"

Dean shook his head, "No, uh, Cas may…you should probably stay. Just in case." Dean didn't wait to see the other man's reaction, he just moved up behind Castiel who hadn't even turned around yet. There was a short pause where he just stood there behind him, close enough to feel Cas' warmth mingle with his own. Dean knew he was just putting this off, trying to have a few seconds of peace before he tore Cas apart, but he would allow himself this last small bit of peace.

He dipped his head down to bump his chin on Cas' shoulder, careful to avoid the spots that he knew were the painful regions. He placed a small kiss to the fabric covering the skin and spoke softly into his ear.

"Cas? Cas, I need to talk to you about something. Can you come sit with me on the bed?"

He felt the other man sigh, but he didn't turn around as he replied, "Is this about the dream I had?"

"No. It's…it's about the _incident_ today," he tried to say calmly, but the word 'incident' came out bitter nonetheless.

Cas hummed absently, "Ah, that. I'm afraid I can't talk about that right now, Dean. There are more…pressing needs at the moment. We can discuss things when I have taken care of the matter."

It was just so tempting to let it drop, for Dean to let Cas remain in ignorance, but that wasn't fair because he knew it wouldn't last long. He would find out eventually and probably, knowing their luck, in the worst way possible. He clenched his jaw and gripped at Cas' shoulders to turn him forcibly around to look at the Captain.

"Cas, we have to talk now. This is important. It's about the crew…you see they…they got a little upset at what happened today, and—"

"And they are all scared of me. I know."

Dean frowned, "Wait, you know? Are you alright?"

Cas just shrugged as if it didn't really effect him in the least, "They have every reason to be scared. I shan't judge them for it. I scare myself sometimes."

This was not the reaction that Dean was prepared for at all and he turned to Balthazar, hoping that maybe he had some insight as to what to take of this. The other man however looked just as lost and confused as the Captain. Dean would have Gabriel fill him in later, right now he had something, someone, who was a little more important at the moment.

"Okay, so you know, but please, please don't…freak out or anything. They'll get over it, I know they will. We just have to give them time. Some things were brought up, like at the bordello—"

Castiel rolled his eyes and shrugged Dean's hands off his shoulders, "Yes, yes, I know that I killed some men there. I know that they think I may hurt them while I dream. I know that they worry that I can't be fixed. I know all this, Dean. I don't care."

He stated it all in a dead voice, almost bored, and that alarmed Dean more than anything. Cas wasn't acting right at all. Cas was so sensitive to their feelings, and with the crew swimming in a pool of paranoia, the Captain had expected Cas to close in on himself, much like he had before whenever he was reminded that others saw him as a monster. Hell, Cas had almost let himself get burned alive because people thought he was a monster. This was ten kinds of wrong and Dean just didn't know how to respond. Balthazar spared him from the empty pause by joining him and Cas by the wall that the smaller man had once again turned his attention to.

"Cassy, maybe we should sit down like Dean said. We should talk about this. I…I don't want this to hurt you, so let's talk about it and make sure you're really alright."

"I'm busy right now. A fly has landed on the windshield and it's distracting."

It was short and harsh, and very unlike how Cas usually spoke to his brother, especially when he was honestly trying to help. Balthazar winced at the tone and looked to Dean for a course of action, but the Captain just wasn't sure how to proceed. Sad, miserable, scared, self-loathing Cas, Dean knew how to handle those, but this… He had to stop and think for a moment what this could mean.

He angled himself so that he could see Cas' face as he continued to run his fingers over the wall. He was tracing them in an outline, almost looked like it was in the shape of a human body, but Dean didn't think that it mattered much. He was paying more attention to his moving lips. He was mouthing words, no noise coming out though and Dean was never really good at reading lips. Damn, it didn't even look like he was speaking English or even mardarin at this point. Could have been gibberish for all he knew, not that it would make anything about this situation any bit more okay.

His eyes were clammed shut, an improvement in his mind because in those few moments when he spoke to Dean, they were dead, dull, devoid of any glow or spark that usually hid in their depths. It was like looking at a corpses eyes, all clouded over. One of his father's old friends had once told him that the cloudy look in a dead person's eyes was just how it looked when they saw the other side, or wherever it was that dead people went to. He didn't want to know what Cas saw with eyes like those, not ever.

"Cas…" he called again gently, but he was ignored. He felt all the air leave his lungs and a wave of ice flow through his blood as he wondered if this was it. If this was Cas who had finally pushed everything and everyone away so that he didn't deal with it anymore. He wouldn't blame him for cutting them all off, from hiding away inside. Dean had tried the same tactic many times before, he just didn't have the obstacle of being psychic to get in the way.

He felt something lodge itself in his throat he had to swallow audibly to clear it again, "Cas, please don't do this—"

"I need silence. Please leave."

This time Dean really felt sick, and he couldn't get out of there fast enough. He only stopped to tell Balthazar to stay with Cas tonight, but then he was up the ladder before he could see or hear anything else that would make this night even worse.

* * *

He knew he couldn't go to bed right then. His hands were shaking so badly that as he seated himself in the kitchen once again, the glass of whiskey in his hands sloshed dangerously. As he sipped at the burning liquid, he kept a running mantra through his head.

_It's just a bad reaction. He'll be fine in a few days, maybe a few days at most. It's just a bad reaction. He'll come back to you, he promised that he would be there. It's just a bad reaction. We'll get through this, we always do. It's just a bad reaction._

No matter how many times he tried to make himself believe it, there was still that blatant and heart clenching doubt that flared up each time he thought about the empty look in Cas' eyes. It was so long ago that Dean first approached Anna with his concern about how the crew might hurt Cas by being bad, or by what Dean thought was his horrendous inner darkness. She had told him that Castiel was drawn by good things, and that this was why Cas had latched on to him and his new family in the first place. Now…now he was pulling away.

Looks like they were bad for him after all. They were hurting him, and Dean couldn't stop it. So much for protecting him.

Dean threw back the last of his drink and slammed the cup down on the table with so much force that any normal glass would have shattered in his hand, only of course, their cups were mostly made of plastic thanks to Cas' first few weeks on the ship shattering almost every glass thing they owned. There was a brief wave of fury that Dean couldn't even have the satisfaction of breaking it, having the sharp shards cut into his hand, make him bleed and hurt like what they were all doing to Cas, but the anger turned into a chuckle that escalated into laughter. Of course then the laughter became hysterical fits that had tears rolling down his cheeks, though the tears could have been from a whole range of emotions. He didn't know or really care at this point.

He may have ruined the best thing that had ever happened to him by not paying close enough attention, by letting things get out of hand. By fucking everything up like he always had.

_It's just a bad reaction. Maybe it'll be like Christmas, and by the time you wake up everything will be dandy. It's just a bad reaction._

He poured himself one more finger of whiskey and downed it in one go. Hopefully it would be enough to get him to sleep that night, cause he really wasn't sure if he could trust the ship's hum to send him into the abyss tonight.

He climbed down his ladder, into his own room and laid down on the empty bed, alone. He stared at the ceiling, waiting for the alcohol to finally kick in.

* * *

The maintenance airlock in the back of the Impala silently opened, completely silent thanks to the preachers boredom induced chore of oiling any and all hinges on the ship. The intruder ducked inside and pulled off his helmet, placing it tucked away in a back corner while pulling out his gun. It had taken a while, but he finally heard the ship go silent and decided it was time to come aboard.

The hunt was on.

* * *

Ah,yes. Now time for plot plot plot :D


	7. Chapter 7

Notes: Just wrote the outline plot for the first of the original episodes. I gotta say, I'm more than a little excited for it.

Leahelisabeth: So am I! I'm am literally too scared to watch the finale coming up. I think I may have to hold off until my friend gives it the okay for me XD

Disclaimer: sad sigh...

* * *

CHAPTER 7

The intruder quietly prowled through the halls, seeking out his prey. He wasn't too sure where this "nest" was that they had mentioned housed the little monster, but he would find it eventually. His footsteps were completely silent, his breathing shallow and light. If he played this right, no one would even see him as he stole his prey from right out under them. If he did this right, they would wake up the next morning one crew member short.

He had to stifle a small laugh.

* * *

Balthazar woke suddenly, shooting up from where he was laid out on the bed, the book he was looking at still flopped open on his chest. Odd. He didn't remember laying down, he didn't even remember feeling sleepy at all as he was still too wired from the day's events. Not to mention that Cassy's behavior had become even more erratic after Dean had left for the night.

He had watched as Cassy continued to pet at the wall, but then he had started to pace the room, much like Dean's own habit. It looked like his little brother was taking on a few of the Captain's traits, but sadly, this was less funny as the serious and somewhat blank expression was prevalent on his face, looking like he wasn't even present there anymore.

That in itself was terrifying enough to get Balthazar's hands all sweaty. How many times had he thought in those first few hours that he had Cassy after their escape from the Host, that maybe his little brother was gone? All that was left was this vessel possessed by something else, stealing his memories and his beloved face. Not a monster like Meg had suggested, or that most of the others had feared at one time or another. Just…another person.

He violently shook his head of the dark thoughts and instead focused on the present, that actually wasn't much better, but that was mostly because once he looked around the room he noticed that Cassy was nowhere to be seen.

He launched off the bed and tore into the bathroom, to see if maybe his brother had gone in there, but it was empty, even the shower stall. He dove back into the room and onto the floor to look under the bed, Cassy's favorite hiding place when they were children, but he wasn't their either.

Now his heart felt like it was trying to jump out of his chest as he tried to remember anything from when he fell asleep, but the only memory he had was of Castiel finally stopping his pacing and walking up to the bed.

"_Cassy? Something wrong?"_

_His brother still wore that dead expression and Balthazar felt a small shiver go through him._

"_Cassy, talk to me, please."_

_Again, there was nothing but a slack face and he watched as Castiel raised his fingers up to Balthazar's forehead._

"_I love you, brother."_

_The last thing Balthazar remembered was the feel of warm fingers on his skin._

"Shit!" He had no idea why his little brother had said that, but it had this sort of finality to it that clenched in his chest. For a moment his mind swam with memories of Cassy at a post, letting those people light him on fire. Then they turned to that moment a few weeks ago where his brother almost overdosed. He said it was for pain, but it could have been something else entirely. And when he had picked up that gun the day before…maybe he wasn't looking to hurt anyone, but himself.

"No. No. No. No. Cassy, what are you doing? Please, no…"

He tore up the ladder and flung open the hatch to step into the hallway…only to come face to face with a man he had never seen before. It was just so shocking, seeing someone new when you had tricked yourself into believing that being out in space, you're always alone, and they both just stared at each other for a second.

The intruder took advantage of the man's, the middle Novak he believed, petrified pause and lashed out with the butt of his gun across the man's chin. Balthazar flew back against the wall and cracked the back of his skull against the hard surface. Without missing a beat, the intruder then grabbed the fugitive by his shirt and tossed him back down the ladder, listening to the loud thud of his body hit the floor beneath before gently closing the hatch behind him, lock slid into place.

He paused for a moment after that, holding his breath to listen to the rest of the ship for any movement. This little scuffle seemed to have not disturbed anyone, so he let himself breath again. That was when he glanced at the nameplate hanging on the hatch that read "The Nest". So it seemed he found it, but he didn't see or hear anyone in the room before he had locked it, and surely there would have been some noise if the younger brother suddenly saw his beloved Balthazar crash to the floor.

His prey must be somewhere else then. Oh, how he liked it when there was a chase involved.

Casually he sauntered down the hall, glancing at each name tag as he walked by, taking stock of who was where. At the end of the hall he found the keypad on the wall that held the controls for the crew quarters. Oxygen, temperature, and what he was looking for, the locks.

Locking the crew in their rooms as they slept would serve many purposes, keeping others from interfering was important, but this would also mean that the middle Novak was wrapped up nice and pretty for him in a corner if he should choose to try and take in some extra body for reward. Maybe. There wasn't much room in his ship for many others, and he had seen earlier in the kitchen the presence of the eldest Novak.

He might not be as valuable as his baby brother, but taking Gabriel would certainly be more profitable than the middle one. He practically felt giddy that things seemed to be falling in to place now. Surely this was a God blessed mission.

The locks on the hatches clicked into place loudly, not that he minded much. If the name plates were right, then all that should be floating around the ship were the preacher, the Companion, the mechanic, and his prey. He was lucky that the Captain had gone to bed. He had worried that he would get in the way.

* * *

_Half an Hour Earlier_

He had been tossing and turning for hours now, and he wasn't any bit closer to falling asleep. His mind was still occupied by thoughts of Castiel. How was he right now? Was he still staring at that wall? Was he sad? Was he angry? Was he lost and confused? Why did he have to push Dean away like that when all he wanted was to help him? Couldn't Cas feel that or had he already shut down completely?

He groaned loudly and buried his face in his pillow, breathing in deep to get at the mingled scent of him and Cas from the previous morning. It was meant to make him feel better, but instead it just hurt and made him miss Cas even more.

With a vicious punch to his mattress, Dean pushed himself off of his bed and moved to the ladder, absently throwing on a shirt over his sleep pants. He was up and prowling towards the Nest in the next five seconds, not pausing or slowing down in the least. Cas may want to push them all away, but Dean wasn't going to let him do that. Thanks to Cas and Sam, he knew that pushing others away never helped anyone.

He pushed open the hatch and peered down into the room to see if Cas was still at the wall, but he wasn't. He let his green eyes trail over the rest of the room, not seeing him anywhere, but he spotted Balthazar on the bed alone and asleep. He would have woken him, perhaps a little roughly because he wasn't watching Cas, but one look at the dark marks under his eyes and the pallor of his skin had Dean second thinking that action. Instead he gently moved the other man so that he was laying down instead of sitting awkwardly against the wall before Dean stepped back to check in the bathroom and then under the bed for Cas. Gabriel had once mentioned that Cas used to like hiding under the bed during thunder storms when they were children, but no dice, Cas was still absent.

As quietly as he could, Dean exited the Nest, on his own hunt to find Castiel.

* * *

_Present_

Sam stirred and slowly opened his eyes to see their darkened room. He wasn't sure what had woken him up, and he lay there for a moment straining his ears to try and discern what had bothered him, but the only sounds he could hear were the soft breaths from Gabriel next to him.

Then he heard it, the little hitch in his partners breath followed by a soft murmur. Sam had heard this a thousand times before from Dean and even from their fellow soldiers as they all tried to sleep in the trenches. It was the precursor for a nightmare, or as Dean had called them, the cries of a baby nightmare still in its infancy.

Gabriel was only moments away from his dream becoming as bad as the one he had the day before, and Sam sighed heavily in the darkness as he moved one hand up and down the pilot's side in a comforting manner while whispering softly to him.

"Gabe…Gabe, it's okay. Everything's fine."

"Cold…sorry…"

Sam frowned at the murmur from Gabriel, taking stock of the room around them. It was actually a little warm for his taste, but as he felt the bare skin of Gabriel's arm he realized how cold he was. It took a bit too much effort to pull their blanket free of their tangled limbs, but Sam was finally able to pull it up over them, hoping to warm the other man up.

"It's okay, Gabe. Everything is okay."

Slowly the pilot's breathing evened out again and Sam felt himself sag in tired relief. Flopping back on their bed he let his mind drift a bit as he tried to fall back asleep. He wondered about Dean and how he and Cas were doing.

His older brother had never been the best at the whole sharing feelings thing, which is why since Cas came along, Sam had taken on this slack jawed look every time he saw Dean do so well with the troubled young man. Not only was Dean there to listen to Cas' problems and even try his best to help him out, but Dean was finally opening up himself. His brother used to be so guarded to the point where Sam was the only one who knew how to read him, but that was different now.

It wasn't just Cas being psychic that let him inside Dean's head. It was more than that, and Sam realized how much they relied on each other now. They kept each other sane, grounded, happy. Keeping the other from falling into the darkness or whatever. It was some odd sort of symbiosis that Sam didn't really understand, and he probably never would. All he could do was sit back and enjoy knowing that Dean had someone he could trust with his whole heart.

There was a dependence there too that may or may not worry the younger Winchester, but who was he to say anything. He depended on Gabriel, on Bobby, and on Dean more than what was probably healthy. It was just his instinct to hold tightly to his family and he knew nothing else besides knowing that your family will always be there for you, always ready to sacrifice for the other. It was just their way and it had kept them all alive and together now for a long time.

Because sticking together is what would keep them all from falling apart.

Sam gripped at Gabriel's arm and pulled the smaller body closer to him and finally he was able to fall asleep.

* * *

Oooo, shiz finally starts to happen in the next chapter! woot woot!


	8. Chapter 8

Notes: Gonna nap so hard after this that there will be a crater in my mattress and I'm going to get a concussion from my pillow.

Leahelisabeth: Let the shiz commence! :D

Disclaimer: I don't think they would like it if I stuck flags in supernatural and firefly and claimed them as my own, so I wont. Columbus should take notes from me.

* * *

CHAPTER 8

Chuck was far too twitchy to sleep. He felt bad for the pain that he had put his Captain through, and probably Castiel too. Both of them where his friends, Dean was practically his hero, and here he was causing them so much distress. As much as he would have liked to take it all back, Chuck knew that he and Anna were right to bring up the concerns, mostly because in the end it would help them figure out what was perhaps done to Castiel faster.

He didn't like thinking that the Host had indeed turned the curious and innocent young man into a monster that was just biding his time, killing whenever he deemed necessary. If Cas was a monster, then they all were. They were all capable of killing. It was a tragic flaw in the human design that their programming allowed for such horrible actions, but at least most of them were programmed with remorse. Cas had remorse. He was no worse than the rest of them…except that he was _really_ good at killing.

In his mind it all came down to what actually made someone evil. Was it how many they killed? How they killed? Who they killed? How bad they felt after they killed? Or was it just some darkness inside? For all his efforts, Chuck couldn't think of any systematic equation that could equal evil. Most of his attempt to define it were wrong, he knew they were wrong because then that would mean that Sam and Dean, his heroes, the ones he looked up to more than anyone else…they were evil.

He snorted at the absurdity of that thought. Those brothers weren't evil at all. Sure if we were going by Bobby's bible they would be damned to hell, but Chuck just couldn't see that happening. Just like he couldn't see that happening with Castiel.

Of course, even with this feeling of his, he still felt a little tense around the young man. Could have just been his normal squirrely nervous nature, but there was a bit more to it since that incident with the grenade.

At this point he had worked in a new kind of logic to how he felt about Castiel whenever he was around. Chuck liked his company, even if he was pretty sure that Cas ignored him most of the time when he was in the engine room with him. He even considered Castiel a friend.

So in his own odd reasoning, Chuck had decided that the best way to think of Castiel was to think of him as a…friendly gun. Dean and Sam always wore one on their belts as if it were naturally attached to them. They were a comfort to the brothers, to know that they always had something there to protect them, but of course the guns were still dangerous and capable of killing, but they were in the right hands.

It was an odd analogy, even for Chuck, but it made him feel better about it all. Hell, they were all guns if he thought about it really hard. Cas just happened to come with a few upgrades. He chuckled at the thought and poked the gauge he had been working on, making sure the readings were correct.

From behind him he heard a soft shuffling noise. Frowning a little he turned around to see what might have caused the noise. It was too soft to be anything from the surrounding machines, so it had to be something else. Perhaps it was Castiel who had come to the engine room to calm down a bit, Chuck knew how much he liked the glowing engine.

"Castiel? Is that you? You can come in if you like," he called out, but there was no response. Guiltily he thought that maybe it was because Dean had told him what Anna and he had shared at the meeting. He didn't want Cas to feel like he wasn't welcome in the engine room anymore though. He went to move to the door but he forgot about his toolbox on the floor by his feet and jammed his toes in hard. After cursing a few times, he bent over to put the tools he had knocked out back in the box. He called out again as he worked.

"Castiel? Did you want to come in?"

Putting the last screwdriver back in place, Chuck glanced up to see if Cas had come in only to come face to face with a man he had never seen before. The mechanic was about to shout out in alarm, but the man slapped a hand over his mouth and the other held up a gun casually to his head.

Chuck whimpered around the hand and looked at his captor. He was a tall, lithe man with dark skin. His eyes were dark, very dark and not just in color, but like they were holding back shadows. The man's eyes didn't stay on the mechanic very long, instead they started to roam around the engine room, taking in the steaming pipes and glowing engine. He breathed in deep, like he was outside on a spring day and appreciating the fresh air. It was more than a little creepy.

"I like this ship. Impala. She's good looking," he commented casually as he turned his attention back to Chuck, his hand loosening from his mouth but keeping the gun raised to remind Chuck that he should probably keep it down a bit.

"H-how did you…g-get on…?

The man smiled, his eyes remaining a little too wide open as he did, giving him a manic look, "Strains the mind a bit, don't it? You think you're all alone. Maybe I came down the chimney, Chuck. Bring presents to the good girls and boys. Maybe not though. Maybe I've always been here."

This guy talked a bit like Cas did, only for whatever reason, this was a lot less fun and a lot more scary.

"What do you w-want?"

The man shrugged and moved forward, causing Chuck to step back further into the engine room to keep them at a good distance. The intruder didn't seem to mind much, his eyes were focused on the engine in the middle of the room, spinning, humming and glowing just like it should.

"That's her heart beating, isn't it? Pull off any one of a thousand parts and she'll just die. Such a slender thread…" he pause and ran a hand over some of the wires sticking out, pulling gently on a few, "You ever been shot, Chuck?"

Chuck's heart started to thud against his chest and his breathing sped up, "Th-the Captain is right down that hallway. He can hear you—"

"Captain Winchester is locked in his room. They all are. There's nobody who can help you. Say it."

Chuck swallowed back some bile, "There's…there's nobody who can help me."

The reality of that statement was enough to make him choke. More than ever he wished that he wasn't so weak, that he was strong like Sam or the Captain, or even Castiel. He felt the first hot tear run down his face as he slammed shut his eyes. He felt the man move up closer to him and waited for the bullet to rip through him. For a moment he thought of Becky. Perhaps he could be with her soon. He hoped that it didn't hurt too much.

He felt a warm breath in his ear as the intruder leaned in close, "I'm going to tie you up now. And you know what I'm going to do then? I'm going to give you a present. Get rid of a problem you've got. And I won't shoot you or harm you an any wrong fashion….unless you make some kind of ruckus," he roughly shook the mechanic who whimpered.

"I meant it. You throw a monkey wrench into my dealing in any way, your life is forfeit. It's nothing but a useless life to me. And I can find all unseemly manners to kill you too if I don't feel like a bullet is enough. Do you understand?"

Chuck whimpered again, but he nodded.

"Good. Now, turn around and put your hands behind your back."

Chuck obeyed, although he worried a bit that the man would get upset that his hand were shaking so badly. Surely it was making tying them up a bit harder.

"Now, tell me Chuck…Where does Castiel sleep?"

Chuck tried to open his mouth to answer, but it was too gummed up and he could only choke out a sob. The man didn't seem to mind much and continued to whisper gently.

"Does he stay with the Captain?

"S-sometimes…he doesn't sleep."

"I see. You have been mighty helpful. You're doing the right thing in God's eyes and you will be rewarded by me taking away the abomination that seems to have taken up residence on this lovely ship. Now remember…_shhh_…"

Gently Chuck was lowered onto the ground with his hands and feet bound tightly and mouth gagged. He was trembling so hard that it must have looked like he was having some sort of fit. He sent out a prayer that Dean and Sam could fix this. They always did.

He let his head drop hard onto the metal floor under him. If he changed his mind from writing fiction, he would totally write a dictionary, and under evil he would put a picture of that man. That was a pretty good definition in his mind.

* * *

Bobby had been staring at the ceiling for a while now and decided that sleep just wasn't going to happen. Damn kids had gotten his mind all troubled and now he was stuck wide awake in his bunk wondering how much of his hair he was going to lose after this mess was over.

He glanced at the clock, noting that he had been like this for going on four hours now. Wearily he sat up in his bunk and got grabbed his towel. Maybe a hot shower would calm him down and take his mind off of things.

He stepped out of his room in the passengers quarters and glanced around. He rather liked living in this part of the ship as opposed to the crew quarters. There was a very noticeable difference between them. The passenger's rooms were softer, light colors and had sliding doors and carpeting. From what he had seen of the crew quarters it was like living in a bunker, surrounded by metal and cement. Only good thing about those rooms was the thick walls and private bathrooms. At least it was quiet down here as it was just him and Balthazar now. Also, at this late hour he had no worries about the shared bathroom already being occupied.

He tried to walk as quietly as possible past Balthazar's room and then to the small hallway that led to the shower. Supposedly the younger man was still watching Cas, but maybe not. Better safe than dealing with a bitchy Balthazar the next morning. He had gotten a good enough distance away to finally relax when he heard a noise by the set of stairs leading up to the engine room.

He frowned. Far as he knew everyone had gone to bed. Perhaps…

"Cas? You there, son?"

There was no answer and he was about to continue on his way to the shower when he heard the noise again. Bobby sighed and put down his towel to move to the stairs. Cas was probably doing something odd again, hopefully he hadn't found where Bobby was hiding the liquor.

"Balls…Cas? You there?"

He walked up to the foot of the stairs and peered up into the dark hallway, squinting to see if he could spot a flash of trenchcoat.

Suddenly, something swung down from above and kicked Bobby hard in the head, laying the preacher out cold on the ground.

* * *

Dean heard a strange noise as he was making his way to the kitchen. He was just passing by the passengers quarters when he heard what he thought sounded like a loud grunt and a thud.

He rolled his eyes, "Damn it, Cas. You had me freaking out. Where the hell have you been and why the hell are you bumping into shit? Don't you have night vision contacts or something?

He made it to the passengers quarters but didn't see anything. He didn't even hear Bobby's snoring vibrating off the walls. Suddenly Dean felt very cold. He was about to call out again when he felt a pair of legs circle around his throat and stark choking him.

From where he hung from the pipes on the ceiling, the intruder smiled as he saw the flinch of pain on the Captain's face. Roughly he twisted his legs and threw Dean to the floor before jumping down in front of him, gun already held up.

"Hello, Captain Winchester. My name is Gordon. I'm here to take care of your pest problem."

* * *

A friendly gun...jeez, I am really weird.


	9. Chapter 9

Notes: Sorry for the short chapter! This episode was filled with really odd breaks and didn't sync up well with my changes, so I'm trying to add as much fluff as possible to keep my minimum of 2,000 words a chapter. ope you like anyway loveys! Heart y'all!

Leahelisabeth: No alerts? For realzies?! Sad faces D: And congrats on your psychic abilities! I'm projecting a gold star your way!

Eri: Don't feel bad! Hugs! Your suggestion of Lucifer actually sounded pretty cool and I had to wonder if he was a better choice, but I do have plans for him...

Disclaimer: All I want right now is some ice cream...

* * *

CHAPTER 9

"Captain Winchester, why don't you sit yourself down?"

Dean had shot up as soon as he saw the gun in his face, peeling himself off of the floor to look this guy in the eyes. He didn't like what he saw there and his skin broke out in goosebumps.

"I'd rather die standing if you don't mind."

Gordon chuckled and nodded in understanding, "It is a good way to die, but the intention is not for you to die. The warrant I have for you doesn't specify any particular need for you to be alive, but…I like to keep things clean. This doesn't have to be the case if we bump into your brother."

He gestured with the gun again and this time Dean sat down, scowl on his face. This guy already knew Dean's weakness' and that meant that he was already screwed seven ways to Sunday. He spared a moment to wonder again where Cas was, hoping that he was no where near this guy. It was bad enough he seemed to know about his weakness for Sam. Who knows what he would do if he knew about Cas.

Still, he was left wondering where this man had come from, why he was there. Wasn't often people just sat themselves down in your ship while it was still in flight. It was like finding a dolphin that had somehow flopped it's way into your cabin on a boat, or sitting on your couch eating popcorn and some dude walks into your house and sits next to you, taking a messy hand-full of your snack. Odd, and incredibly awkward. This guy must have soem reason to be here.

"What do you want? Is this about Dick?"

Gordon only shrugged, "Don't know who that is or why you think he's pissed at you. From what I've found out about you, you have a very unhealthy amount of enemies. Wonder why that is? Did you not share your toys with them as a child? But believe it or not, even with your multitude of aggressors, that's not what I'm here for. Tell me, Dean. Where is Castiel?"

Dean's stomach bottomed out. This guy must be a Host agent, or someone hired by them and in that case they were screwed. His mind flew through all the possibilities of what this could mean, what could happen in the next few hours if this guy was a fed. Now Dean really wished that he knew where Cas had gotten to, just so that he could keep this guy as far from there as possible.

In his mind Dean saw a crying and struggling Castiel being dragged away while screaming for Dean. He saw Sam watching as Gabriel was dragged away, yelling for Dean to do something. He saw Balthazar being shot on sight in some small semblance of mercy as they took his brothers away. Dean saw himself falling into darkness again. This was the moment that Dean had been dreading for over a year. The nightmare that haunted him even during the day when he was wide awake. Someone was here to tear his family apart.

"I'm not telling you anything."

Gordon tutted softly at Dean, "That's a shame. I know this is personal for you Dean. That you love that creature," he saw Dean's eyes flash angrily, "It was plain for anyone to see, and I could hear it in your voice earlier, but I promise you that he isn't what he seems. He's an abomination. I'm not here to destroy your life as you think, that's not what this is. This isn't anything personal against you. I'm not a killer, Dean. I'm a "hunter". And your little friend is fair game."

"He's not a fucking turkey for you to take home as a prize! He's a human being who has done nothing wrong!"

"I don't believe that. He has washed your mind, and I bet it's easy enough for him. You see…I've heard the rumors of what went on in that place, of what they did to those like Castiel…I didn't take too much stock in it, but there were whispers of mental abilities that would literally blow your mind. From the way he seems to have ensnared you, I'm starting to believe it."

Dean heard himself growl. There was no way that he would let this guy tell him that Cas had been playing with his head all along. He loved Cas, and Cas loved him back. It was just that simple. And he knew that Gordon was able to pull his answer from Dean's expression alone. His hunt just got a little more interesting.

Gordon didn't seem to mind the fury in Dean's eyes and casually regarded the older Winchester, "So where is Castiel? Did I accidentally lock him in your room? I had a feeling that you two were involved physically."

An absent shrug as the Captain tried his best to look calm and collected, even though inside his head he was formulating a whole alphabet of plans of how he may get them all out of this. Every single one of them required that he kill this guy, and it didn't bother him in the least. He was going to protect what was his. This was for everyone on his ship. This was for Sam, for Balthazar, for…Cas. He tried to clear his throat of the gunk that seemed to be building up there as his worry rose.

Dean watched as Gordon "I found his…"nest"…where I spotted his brother. If you cooperate I might just let you keep him and just take the youngest one. Still not too sure about the oldest Novak, I wasn't expecting him to be here. I thought he would be hiding in some other corner of the 'verse. He abandoned his brothers before after all, and I certainly didn't picture him and his brothers getting back together after 12 years."

"Yeah, well, we have a good family therapist on board. We also have a good track record of caring for crazy people if you want to give it a go."

Gordon let out another small chuckle, "I like you, Dean. That's why I'm trying to make this as easy for you as possible. I plan on taking Castiel in and getting the reward, which is substantial. His wanted poster stated very firmly that the target must be alive, so take that as a comfort at least."

"What I'll take as a comfort is you dead and people not hunting Cas down like he's an animal."

Gordon regarded him sadly, "I think you may be wrong about that. According to your crew, your little angel has killed quite a few men recently. He vicious, Dean."

Now Dean had to laugh at that, "_Vicious?!_ I get it, he's got good aim with a gun, but maybe there was a mix up at the post offices' wanted wall. I mean, we're talking about the same guy who cries when Bobby vacuums up dust bunnies. Hell, I've seen his face plant on the ground just to avoid stepping on a fucking ant! And you're a fucking bounty hunter. I can see from your eyes that you have killed plenty of men and don't feel the least bit bad about it. Cas is a wreck if he hurts someone, even if they deserved it."

This time Gordon bristled a bit, "I'm a hunter. I hunt animals, nothing else. Your little friend isn't right. He's dangerous and needs to be taken care of. Normally I prefer to kill my prey because then I know that I've done my part to destroy one more monster. It makes me feel good, you see. Sadly, this time he needs to be alive. Something I don't get in the least, but I know I'm turning him over to those who can handle the beast. But do you know why I truly love this life?"

"Oh, please. Do tell."

Gordon ignored or didn't hear the sarcasm, "It's all black and white. There's no maybe. Find the bad thing, kill or trap it. You see, most people spend their whole lives in shades of gray. "Is this right, is that wrong?" Not me."

Dean plastered on a fake smile, "Well isn't that nice that you've got it all figured out." Gordon preened.

"Indeed, and I know that Castiel falls into the back zone. He's unnatural, Dean. There's nothing to change what he is now, even if he was born human. I hope you understand that eventually...now, I still need to know where Castiel is. Perhaps he's sleeping in someone else's cabin?" he smirked when he saw the Captain's eyes flare angrily at the subtle suggestion, "Perhaps he is with your brother? Maybe even in the Companion's room?" he laughed at the last part and it took every ounce of self restraint to keep Dean from lunging at this guy and strangling the life out of him.

With vehemence he replied a very firm, "No."

"You sure? Maybe he likes people who aren't emotionally constipated," at Dean's startled look, "Oh, please. Even now I can see you trying to hide how scared you are. Look tough for me even though you're shaking in your boots. I have no doubt that you hide more than just that."

"This is insane. I'm not going to help you find him, in any case," Dean hissed and to that Gordon sighed wearily and moved closer to Dean, but kept just enough distance that he couldn't lash out.

"You're going to help me whether you like it or not. If it's true, that you and Castiel are enamored with each other, then I think you will be a very helpful tool for me. Never underestimate the power of the right kind of bait."

"Cas isn't stupid…"

The laugh that came from Gordon was dark and somehow made the room feel colder, "Perhaps, but if you're right and maybe he's in love with you, then that's just the same thing as being stupid in my eyes." Then he roughly grabbed Dean's chin and placed the gun against his jugular, "But you…there's hope for you yet. You're not stupid, and you're going to come with me while we track down my prey."

"I don't think my last act in this 'verse is going to be betraying my best friend," Dean growled through his clenched and aching jaw. Gordon pinched tighter, making Dean wince.

"Oh, but you're going to come with me still, because every second you're with me is a chance to turn the tables. Get the better of me. Maybe you'll find a moment. Maybe I'll slip. Or, you refuse to help me, I shoot you or your brother's brains out, then I go spend some time with the rest of your crew….and I'll make Castiel watch. Make him see all the pain and death he has caused with his existence."

Gordon leaned in closer until Dean could feel the putrid heat of his breath on his ear, "…I'll make sure that he'll be weeping for the rest of his unnatural life if you don't come with me. I'll make him cry, and I'll dip my cookies in his tears, dongma?"

Dean turned to look at him in horror, "Y-you're out of your mind."

Another chuckle as the bounty hunter stood up again and casually stretched his back, "That's between me and my mind. Let's get started with these rooms, shall we?"

* * *

G damn...I made Gordon kinda scary in this. And that was also an incredibly dialog heavy chapter, my good golly gosh!


	10. Chapter 10

Notes: Looking back, the character of Juble Early from firefly...was friggin terrifying. How the hell did I not see before how utterly insane this guy was?! Dude is the stuff of nightmares.

Leahelisabeth: I totally agree, Gordon was a very odd character who just kind of...lost it. It made for fun literary exploration of where the line of crazy becomes insane, and when killing becomes evil. Or as Gordon would put it, living in my little world of shades of gray (and not that friggin book...) It was fun to look at Cas and Gordon anyway :)

Disclaimer: *gross sobbing*

* * *

CHAPTER 10

A thousand thoughts were flying through Dean's mind as Gordon and him moved around the ship. Primarily his thoughts were on Cas. His thinking was, if he focused enough on the other man, maybe with all his psychic-ness he could read Dean's thoughts, hide somewhere safe until Dean could come up with a plan.

Surely Cas could feel the revolting fear pouring off of Dean right now?

They had started with the passenger quarters, Dean doing his best to do as much nothing as he could without getting a gun shoved in his spine, but it looked like Gordon had done his homework on firefly class ships and would snap at Dean constantly.

"Don't think I don't know about those hidden compartments all over this model. How about you open up that wall panel and check for my little hawk in there?"

The bounty hunter was even making Dean get on his hands and knees to check under the bed, like somehow he knew the same story that Gabriel had told him about Cas and thunderstorms. Each time Dean would curse under his breath and practically have to pry his eyes open with each new hiding place he looked in to, just waiting for that one place that he would look in to have two big frightened blue eyes looking back. And then it would all be over.

He tried to not think about letting that happen, not letting those dark thoughts overwhelm him, but damn it, they kind of did anyway. There was so much to lose here tonight, and this Gordon guy didn't even have the courtesy to give him a heads up, or even a moment to collect himself. There were just too many lives at stake right now and it terrified him.

He could lose Cas.

He shook his head and cursed again as he pulled back the hanging curtain in the passenger's shower as they checked the bathroom. Thankfully, Cas was not there and Dean hid his relief as he turned to face Gordon again, scowl present in full force.

Now, Dean was a soldier once. He knew just how to spot an opening, but it wasn't like Gordon was some green naive guy looking for an easy payday. This guy had experience, and sadly enough, Dean had to admit this guy was good. The man's tall frame looked relaxed and casual, like he was just getting a penny tour from Dean, but his stance was so precise, that the Captain had yet to even see an opening, let alone go for it. It was like trying to swat a house fly. It would be sitting there on your arm, rubbing it's hands together as it plotted your death or something, and as soon as you even flinched your arm it would fly off. Probably cackling too, fucking flies.

Other things zooming across his mind were thoughts of Sam and his crew. Was Balthazar okay after Gordon found him? Was Sam still asleep, or had he woken up to find himself locked in? What about Chuck? He was in the engine room and must have heard something since it was so close to the crew quarters.

And what about Bobby? When they had slid open the door to Bobby's room in the passenger quarters, Dean had wholly expected to find the preacher there reading something, or maybe sleeping, but he wasn't there. Dean didn't know whether to be alarmed or relieved. Who knows what Gordon plans to do if they run into other crew members.

That small section of the ship checked out, Gordon shoved the Captain in the direction of the hallway towards the stairs. Begrudgingly, Dean obeyed and moved ahead of the bounty hunter, knowing that the gun was held pointed at his spine.

He was trying his best to look calm and collected, to not give away anything else to this guy, but all that was lost when he came upon a still body at the foot of the stairs. Dean let out a distressed cry and fell to his knees at Bobby's side.

"Bobby? Hey, wake-up! Bobby!"

Frantically Dean gently tapped the preacher's bearded face and tugged on his shirt like a child trying to wake his parents too early in the morning, but Bobby didn't stir. Dean groaned and pressed his fingers up to his neck, momentarily wishing Cas was there to heal him but then squishing the thought as he glared at Gordon. There was a pulse, nice and strong and steady. Just unconscious then, not that it made Dean any less angry.

Leaping to his feet Dean got as close as he could to the bounty hunter, his eyes aflame with fury, but Gordon just shrugged.

"He's not killed. Be a while before he comes to, but he'll mend."

"And in your little world of black and white, where does beating up a Sheppard fall?"

Gordon chuckled darkly, "That ain't a Sheppard," and then gestured for Dean to keep moving.

As much as Dean would have liked to inquire further into that comment, he didn't want to give the other man the satisfaction. Instead he just reminded himself that when this was all over, and everyone was safe, he should ask Bobby again about…wherever the hell he came from.

* * *

The next place along their little impromptu tour, was the infirmary. If Gordon noticed that Dean was walking extra slow, or taking his time peeking around corners, he didn't say anything, or shoot the Captain, so Dean kept his pace at grandma levels. Seriously, only thing that could make him go slower would be an actual walker.

Even though at first glance you could know for sure that no one was in the small infirmary, Dean still took his time moving in and glancing around, opening cupboards and flipping over a few kidney dishes to see if Cas had gone magically micro, just to see if he could get a rise out of the bounty hunter.

To his surprise though, Gordon followed him in to the small room and was also glancing around. Hell, the guy even looked up at the ceiling! What did he think Cas was, a freaking moth or something?

Feeling a bit flippant, he picked up a lab coat and shook it out before looking to Gordon with a bright smile, "Not here!" he chirped. The other man's expression didn't change in the least.

"You know, you could always give up this depraved life of bounty hunting and live off of gambling with that poker face you got there."

Again, his face didn't change as he continued to glance around the room, eyes falling on the cabinet that Bobby had to repair after Cas had tore the door from its' hinges. Even now you could see the metal was still bent and crumpled in places.

Dean sighed and leaned back against one of the counters, "He wouldn't come in here anyway. He hates this room."

Gordon didn't seem to be paying attention to Dean, so he just raised the volume of his voice.

"You see, Gordy, the people you're planning to sell him to cut his brain up in a lab, just like this. Tortured him, an innocent man. Not some criminal on a murder run, just an innocent man looking for his brother—"

"You've been shot, haven't you?"

Dean bristled, "Not killed though."

"So you know pain?"

Dean swallow hard, "More than most."

"Yes, I read your file. You given pain, received pain, and not even just in the physical sense. Lost both your parents too, I saw."

"You got somewhere you're going with this?" Dean growled.

"I'm just thinking that you have this extensive amount of knowledge in suffering, yet you still try to defend something that could bring you more hurt than most humans can even stand to endure and live. You have been keeping this ticking time bomb on your ship for over a year now, one door down from your precious little brother, and you still want to keep him near when he had already proven himself a danger to your crew. He slashed up one of yours, did he not?"

Dean snorted, "Yeah, well, Meg's a special case."

A cabinet door was gently closed after Gordon peeked inside and knocked around a few supplies, like maybe Cas was hiding behind the catheters or something.

"Do you know what a loose cannon is? It's a term from ancient times when on old battles ships, some dead beat didn't tie down the cannon, or its' ropes were frayed, and this 800 pound hunk of metal was just seconds away from breaking free and squishing any poor sailor in its' path, friendly or not. A loose cannon might not be noticed before it's already killed, and then there are those that someone always notices and thinks, "I'll just get that tomorrow," but they never do. I'm thinking Castiel is a loose cannon, and you just aren't ready to take care of it. Do you really want something that dangerous on your beloved ship?"

Dean smiled brightly, "In case you haven't noticed already, my entire ship is full of loose cannons. Always makes dinner a more exciting affair. Thinking that I'm probably the biggest one on my crew. And I'm not just talking about my manhood...well, maybe that too. You can ask Cas if we find him."

* * *

After Gordon had made Dean check every shadow and corner around the stairwell, they finally moved up the stairs and on to the catwalk. Dean was on full alert, despite his casual saunter across the metal grating. The catwalk was an excellent lookout because from there you could see the entirety of the cargo hold, and had a position to block the entrances to both shuttles and the control room.

It was a well known back-up plan among the crew members, for if there was any danger on the ship, the best course of action would be to go to the shuttles and either hide there, or fly away in them. Dean had cussed himself out mentally for the last five minutes as they moved up to the shuttle docking stations. He had been making plans to teach Cas how to fly these things for months now, but had never actually got around to it. Cas could have flown safely away from all this if Dean had just taken the time to show him how to fucking steer. Not to mention, if this went poorly, Dean wouldn't even have those memories of teaching Cas, which Dean just knew would be hilarious and heart warming...all the missed hand brushes, the adorable confused looks and tilted head, the innuendos when Dean taught him how to work the joystick...missed opportunities but it just steeled Dean's resolve to make sure that Cas didn't go anywhere.

He felt Gordon shift behind him and knew that the bounty hunter was calculating which shuttle they should explore first. Dean did his best to look completely indifferent, knowing that Anna was in the one on the left, but inside he was doing some calculations of his own. Like what were the chances of this guy trying to hurt a Companion.

"Come on out, Cas…The nice man wants to kidnap you…" Dean sing-songed. He was rewarded with a sharp "hush" from the other man as he looked around the cargo hold. For once his face wasn't blank and he had a sort of fond smile on his face. He turned around so that his back was presented to the Captain as he leaned out over the railing to look down. Dean tensed up.

"I like the way the walls g out. Gives you an open feeling. The firefly is a good design. People don't appreciate the substance of things. Objects in space. People miss out on what's solid."

Slowly Dean started to inch forward, hoping that as Gordon drooled over his baby, he might be just distracted enough for Dean to—

The gun was suddenly pointed at Dean, perfectly aimed at his chest despite Gordon still not facing him, "It's not your moment, Captain."

He pushed off the railing and Dean had to fight the urge to go wipe it down with something. That railing was his and Sam's spot, the place that they would lean on when they we in one of those sappy sharing moods. That was their spot, gorramn it.

"The shuttle on the left is the Companion's shuttle, correct?"

"Yes," Dean bit out.

Gordon nodded but still didn't look at the Captain. He was just a bit too comfortable around Dean for his liking. He had to admit, it was a little demeaning for someone as dangerous as Dean to not even be treated seriously as a threat, but he wouldn't say anything.

"Okay, we'll try the empty shuttle first, then we'll pay her a visit."

They make to move into the one on the right, but Gordon suddenly stops like he's heard something. Dean strained his ears, praying to not hear the soft sounds of bare feet and rustling trenchcoat, but he heard nothing. He looked questioningly at the bounty hunter who was running his hands down one of the metal rails.

He looked thoughtful as he leaned forward, licking at it.

Behind him, Dean gagged. Definitely cleaning that with bleach later.

* * *

Dun dun dun!


	11. Chapter 11

Notes: Tonight...I can't think about tonight...I can't handle it cause I know I won't be able to handle it! ARGH!

Leahelisabeth: It'll totally be spring cleaning time once this is all done. I can see the boys all in aprons and feather dusters now XD

Guest: So glad that you are enjoying the series :D

Disclaimer: I can't handle it.

* * *

CHAPTER 11

"This is pointless, you know that, right?"

Anna was still in her bed sitting up and clutching the sheets around her while Dean stood at her side in a protective stance. Thankfully Gordon wasn't paying them too much attention as he pushed aside the many draperies in the room and opened up every chest, box, and peered into every vase.

As much as Dean hated that he even thought of it, he wasn't going to put it past this guy to maybe take advantage of the lovely Companion and the Captain refused to let him have a clear look at her instead moving his body in between the two like a shield. His skin crawled as he watched Gordon rifle through her wardrobe, but that was probably nothing compared to what Anna was probably feeling and he cast her a sympathetic look.

But Anna, she always surprised him. She looked at him and instead of being scared or grossed out, she just looked pissed off and sent Dean her own sympathetic look. This guy was here for Cas after all and she knew how the Captain must be suffering.

"Pointless? 5 million seems fairly pointed to me. Money like that, I could retire…not that I would. What's life without work, right? Not to mention that I take a certain satisfaction in the results of my work, taking the trash off the streets so to speak. You should be grateful. Who knows what this particular little danger might have done to you."

"You mean like save my life," Anna bit back, her hands clenched angrily in her sheets at the unspoken suggestion of his words.

The lid of the last chest he checked in was dropped shut, the loud thud making both Anna and Dean jump a little and the delicate objects around the room tinkle and rock dangerously on their perches. They flinched even harder as Gordon threw back his head and laughed, at least, Dean thought it was a laugh. Kinda more like a gasping cackle that sent icicles down his spine. He stepped a little closer to Anna.

"It's funny how each of you talk about how scared you are of this boy, but you defend him like your favorite puppy who just chews up your shoes every once in a while. You all really don't see how blind you all are being?"

Dean smirked, "Hard to see when you're blind, I guess."

That earned him a scowl from the bounty hunter who started to slowly saunter around the room. There were no more places to look, Cas was definitely not here, but he obviously hadn't gotten all he wanted out of this room. Dean moved even closer to Anna, the backs of his legs finally hitting the mattress.

"This model ship is known as the best smuggling vessel to have. I know for a fact that there are hundreds of places that my little hawk could hide, and according to the records I found of you, you have been here for a few years now. I bet you could tell me all the places he could be hiding," he said to the Companion.

"I highly doubt you have enough time to check all those places. There are hundreds after all, besides, I know this ship better than I know myself. If you want to find Cas, you're going to need me," Dean told him, pulling the attention back on him and away from Anna. There was no way that he was going to let her get dragged into this. Out of the corner of his eyes he saw her relax a fraction.

A loud and annoyed sigh came from Gordon, "You're boy is becoming a real pain in my ass, Dean."

"I feel for you," Dean bit back sarcastically and thankfully Gordon didn't seem to take offense to such things and lazily gestured with his gun for Dean to leave the shuttle, but he turned to Anna once more before they moved on, pushing past Dean to get within range of the Companion. He looked at her, eyes wide with meaning.

"I'm not going to waste my time threatening you, because I think you believe I _will_ kill people if someone upsets my plan. You seem to like this crew, but I'm still going to seal you in though. You just sit quietly like a good little whore and listen to what the man tells you."

"You can still walk away from this. I know you're tired—"

Whip-fast, Gordon took his gun and hit her across the face with it, bloodying her lip before Dean could even open his mouth in protest.

"Don't go visiting my intentions. Don't ever. You don't even know the first thing about me, no matter how much your whore academy taught you to read men."

He curled his lips up at her in a sneer and pushed a fuming Dean out of the shuttle roughly before slamming the door shut behind them, locking it from the outside.

He turned to Dean and the fury that was on his face for those few seconds with Anna was completely gone, leaving his relaxed and casual expression behind and Dean wondered not for the first time just who the hell he was dealing with.

"Man is stronger by far than woman, yet only woman can create child. Does that seem right to you?"

Even though Dean knew it wasn't meant to be answered, he felt an obligation to at least throw in his own two cents, "If you think men are stronger, then you obviously haven't ever seen a woman when you leave the seat up."

That earned him a rough poke in the back with the gun, but it was totally worth it.

* * *

After a good half hour kicking around the hold, checking in all of the crates and boxes, and pulling off all of the side panels, Gordon finally gave the all clear for that room. As grateful as Dean was that they had yet to find Cas, and as result was getting more time to catch an opening, he was also starting to have some concerns himself as to where Cas had gotten himself to.

At this point all of the hallways had been checked and the kitchen rummaged through, and Gordon assured him that he engine room was already checked-out, so Dean was sort of at a loss. All that were left were the crew quarters where all the doors were locked, and the control room.

"I'm starting to get a little impatient here, Captain. Are you sure that your little friend isn't…warming someone else's bed tonight? Perhaps that little bitch that you all seem to dislike a bit. Perhaps it's jealousy? Perhaps you have suspected for a while that he is finding…satisfaction, elsewhere."

Dean felt his blood boil, "Shut up! Cas hates Meg as much as the rest of us. You wanna check out her room, be my guest!"

_And hopefully she'll be sleeping with a rifle in her hands like she usually does. _

Then he cursed as he remembered that he had locked up all her weapons yesterday.

_Well, fuck._

"A sound idea. Let's go investigate your crew quarters then."

* * *

The first room they checked was the Nest, just to see that Balthazar was exactly where Gordon had dumped him, still dead to the world. The bounty hunter didn't even feel obligated to move down the ladder, knowing that if Castiel was down there, surely he would have at least moved his brother's head so that his face wasn't smothered on the floor.

Meg's was next and even Dean tensed up as the hatch was opened up. There had once been a sign that Gabriel had put on her door, "Beware of Attack Dog", that she had actually let stay up without comment or complaint, but it had been removed by Dean after a while. It was just a little too accurate for him and it gave him the willies every time he had to walk by her room.

Needless to say, entering her territory was some scary business and Gordon was making Dean go in first, the smart bastard.

The second his feet touched the floor, he was sent sprawling against the wall as he was kicked in the chest, and at the same time a shot went off, making Meg yelp.

The lights in the room were suddenly on and there was Gordon by the switch, his gun raised and recently fired. Dean looked between Meg who was clutching her bleeding arm, her shooting arm, and at the bounty hunter in shock. How the hell did he make that in the dark?

"What the fuck, Dean!? Who the hell is this and why the hell are you in my room?! Don't you already have your own bed warmer? And why the hell was I shot!?"

The short brunette was livid, practically snarling and foaming at the mouth. She actually looked more pissed at having people in her room than being shot. It was actually kind of funny in a "I'm laughing at a rabid wolf as she plots my death" kind of way. Even Gordon seemed a bit amused at her temper.

"My sincere apologies for that, my dear. Couldn't have you harming the Captain before he's served his purpose."

She looked to Dean questioningly, her hand still clenched around her arm trying to staunch the blood flow. Gordon noticed the look and decided to take pity on her confusion.

"I'm here for Castiel Novak. Dean here is helping me track him down, but if you have any information as to his whereabouts, then I would greatly appreciate it."

Meg glanced back at Dean, as if silently asking if this guy was for real and perhaps also in surprise that the Captain was actually helping this guy without even a few fingers cut off first. He gave her a short jerky nod, confirming what was said and he watched as her eyebrows rose comically slow.

She choked a bit before responding, "Ah, well, I can't say that I've seen Crazy Cakes recently, but best bet would be with the Captain, and as we can all plainly see…"

Gordon nodded in understanding, "Well, thank you for your time. We'll be off then."

He didn't even bother checking under her bed, and Dean's mouth hung open as he processed the fact that Meg didn't sell him out, or Cas for that matter. She didn't even offer to find him for the bounty hunter in exchange for a share in the profits.

He was still in a semi-socked state after they had climbed out of her room, locking her in behind them. The next room was Dean's, that they hopped into and checked out.

Dean was checking the bathroom while keeping Gordon in the corner of his eye as the other man poked around his and Cas' bed. Some primal part of him growled at the thought of that man touching or even looking at the place where he and Cas slept and embraced each other. This guy was encroaching on his territory and his people, and that made Dean itch all over.

Dean was more than happy to move on from that room, but wasn't too glad to realize that the next room to check out was Sam's and Gabriel's. He was leading this psycho right to his little brother, and that just didn't sit right at all. Gordon took note of his discomfort.

"If you're so worried about leading someone like me to your brother, then why weren't you worried about having someone like Castiel near him? Living with him?"

"Don't you dare compare yourself to Cas. You're nothing like him."

"You're right. I'm human after all."

As much as Dean wanted to claw this guys' eyes out for that comment, he instead focused his attention on stepping down the ladder into the darkness of his brother's room. As he touched the floor he immediately moved over to Sam's bed to stand between him and Gordon as the bounty hunter hopped into the room.

Once again, the lights were switched on and both figures in the bed started to move and groan at the rude awakening. Sam was the first to sit up with the most magnificent head of bed hair Dean had ever seen. Oh how he wished he could have seen this on any other occasion. Gordon just had this uncanny ability to suck the funny out of the sight.

Sam blinked a few times, eyes first falling on his brother and frowning, "Dean? What's up? Is something wrong with Cas?"

At the mention on his little brother's name, Gabriel, who had buried his head under his pillow to hide from the light, shot his head up to look at Dean with a panicked expression.

"Hello, Gabriel. I'm looking for your youngest brother," Gordon raised his gun and pointed it straight at Sam's head, "Have you seen him?"

* * *

Oh, damn, sorry about the cliffy there . Let us just pray that there is no cliffy tonight!


	12. Chapter 12

Notes: Sorry for not posting yesterday! Had the migraine from hell (Thank you so much finals week!) and couldn't even look at a computer screen, much less spent two hours one a chapter, but never fear! Next chappie is here! :D (Thank jesus that I didn't have an exam yesterday! Lol!) And I'm not ready to talk about the finale just yet. I'm still...processing the awesome and feels XD

Leahelisabeth: Well, there will be some h/c in the last couple chapters... but I think what you're looking for will be found in the next episode *whistling innocently and not revealing more*. I do hope peeps like what I have in store for the boys in the first original one! .

Disclaimer: Nada. Nunca. Niet, Nein. No. Non. *spanish accent* No.

* * *

CHAPTER 12

"You best think twice about pointing that thing at my brother there, Gordy."

Of course, this declaration only made the bounty hunter smirk as his hand didn't even waver in the slightest. It remained leveled at Sam's forehead, effectively freezing both Dean and Gabriel right where they were as the object of both their affections, brotherly or other, was threatened.

"Sorry, boys, but Sam here is just the perfect carrot to dangle in front of both your faces."

On the bed, Sam was clearly as unhappy with the situation as the other two as his breath became harsh and his teeth were being bared, and Gabriel next to him was practically trembling in rage. His golden eyes were taking on that flare that always served to remind others that he also had been 'altered' in his time at the Host and could be hiding his own tricks still. Although, the normal terror he could produce was somewhat muted since he was naked except for a pair of boxers with small green aliens on them riding rockets.

"Now, Gabriel, about that baby brother of yours…"

"I'm not telling you shit."

Gordon's eyebrows rose to his hairline, "Really? While I got this gun on Sam's head you're just gonna say no?" he tutted, "Risky."

"Yeah well, I like to live on edge. Sometimes I even open the candy bar from the wrong end," Gabriel sneered back, his fingers twitching to reach for the vase beside there bed. Not that he would use it anyway. It held some flowers Castiel had grown for them, but all the same, Gabriel really wanted to smash something over this guys head.

"I see, well I suppose I shouldn't be all too surprised at you not really caring about Sammy here much. I mean…you did abandon your brothers for twelve years after all. Left a young teenager with your drunk and partying brother and just…flitted off, not even caring what had happened to them. I would know if you had tried to contact them too. I checked each and every correspondence that went to your brothers during my investigation. Not even a single Christmas card, basket of flowers with a note attached, or even semaphore outside their windows."

"And that's exactly how they have gone so long without being found," Sam bit back at him, jumping to Gabriel's defense. They all knew how guilty the eldest Novak felt about leaving his brothers along for so long, but Sam wasn't about to let a complete stranger rub it in. Family was everything on this ship, and Gabriel knew that better than most.

Gordon seemed to consider this, but there was no grand epiphany or change of heart from it, he just kept the gun held steady, and Dean was starting to feel his palms start sweating the longer it was trained on his brother.

"Yes, it did make this difficult, but I found you in the end, and now I need to find your brother to put him back where he belongs, and I'm not opposed to taking you in as well…"

"You're not taking Gabriel anywhere—"

"Sam, calm down!" the elder Novak cried, pulling Sam back on the mattress as he watched Gordon's fingers tense around the gun with his sudden movement, Dean also wincing and uselessly trying to move closer to his brother.

"Sam, Sam, Sam…you and your brother…well, all of you really, need to stop and think for a moment. Weren't you all just gathered not a few hours ago all scratching your head over what you can do to fix your "problem", well boys, I'm your solution."

"You're a fucking cockroach is what you are," Dean growled, but Gordon didn't seem to take offense. Probably had people call him a lot worse Dean thought, not without a bit of satisfaction at that.

There was a short pause where they all tensed, the Impala crew all wondering if Gordon would finally just shoot Sam, but the bounty hunter hadn't moved, he looked like he was pondering on something. Maybe he was considering shooting all of them and looking for Castiel on his own…Not for the first time Dean cursed at himself for making Sam lock away all of the weapons in his and Gabriel's room along with Meg's. Would have been nice if they could have just pulled the gun out from under the pillows. He sighed wishfully.

Gordon's voice had them all snapping to attention, "Okay, Gabriel. I don't give half a hump about Balthazar, he's piss poor for a hunt and it would be like trapping a rabbit, but you on the other hand would probably bring me a pretty penny. Now, I still need to track down Castiel, but since I've got you all cornered…"

"I'm not helping you find him. I won't help you send him back to that place."

Smirking, Gordon shook his head, "Oh, don't you worry on that. I have my lovely assistant Dean helping me with that. And I just happen to be in a deal making mood. So I'm going to give you a choice. You come with me, and you get to hold your brother's hand as I hand you back to the feds…or, I let you stay, but if I let you stay I take Balthazar and I shoot Sam here. You would get to keep your freedom, at that small price."

Dean and Gabriel both made distressed sounds at the threat and their breath started to pick up. Dean wasn't sure if this situation could get any worse and was just holding his breath until the next moment that the air would be punched from his lungs.

Sam however was sitting calmly on the bed as he half turned to the pilot next to him, "Gabe…you do what you have to, but don't let them take you or your brothers back to that place. Promise me you won't go back and that you will keep an eye on Dean and Cas."

"Sam—"

"I mean it."

"Sam, I won't let it get that far," Dean promised, wishing that Gordon wasn't in the room as the Captain started to unravel, desperation covering him like a bucket of cold water. Of course Gordon was just standing there watching them, self-satisfied smirk on his face. This was probably like day-time tv for him, his own personal live-action soap opera. It was kind of accurate considering how much this guy seemed to know about their personal lives. Creepy.

Gabriel seemed to come to some sort of decision and got up from the bed to face Gordon, "I'll go with you. Just…don't hurt anyone."

"Gabe, no—"

The pilot turned and pulled Sam's face in his hands, "I'll be fine. I got out once, I can do it again. I'll come back, I promise." It's not like Gordon would complain. He would still get paid even if Gabriel broke him and Cas out a week later, but Sam felt like his heart was being ripped out, and he just knew that the light that had returned to Dean's eyes in the last year was dimming as Cas and Gabe were being pulled away. Everything was falling apart…

"We have to stick together, Gabe."

"We will! Like glue, just…hot glue in that weird in-between stage where it gets really long and stringy as it's moved apart, but still together, right?"

Somehow Sam was able to muster up a bitchface that Gabe had to kiss once more before turning to Gordon, "I'll go with you."

Gordon smiled brightly, "Excellent, finally one of you Novaks cooperates. As reward I'll let you sit here with Sammy until I come back to collect you. Gotta find your baby brother first. Come along, Dean. We've still got some more ground to cover."

Dean sent Gabriel one last look, one saying about a thousand different things at once.

_I'll protect Cas. I won't let him be taken away. I won't let them break up our family. I won't let them hurt Sam. You and your brothers are family…Thank you._

Once again, Dean was roughly shoved towards the ladder and they left the room, locking the hatch loudly behind them. The loud clang actually felt like a punch to the gut.

* * *

There was one last place to check, and Dean was already feeling sick as they got closer to the control room. They would probably find Cas there, sitting against the wall looking at the stars or something. He would look up at Dean with wide and scared blue eyes, wondering why Dean would guide this monster right to him, why Dean was letting this man take him back to the Host? Why had Dean failed him?

Except that when they got to the control room it was quite obviously very much and startlingly empty. Dean felt a hysterical giggle bubble in his chest and was so tempted to let it out, but instead he just let his lips quirk slightly. He wasn't even the least bit offended by the fact that Cas had been able to hide on Dean's own boat and the Captain couldn't even find him. Cas must have been some hide and seek champ when he and his brothers were kids.

Dean's small smile fell when he noticed the livid look on Gordon's face. Obviously Mr. Calm-Collected-and Crazy was finally letting his mask slip and he wasn't happy.

"All right, that's all the cat and mouse that I've got time for," and Gordon moved up to the P.A system and pulled the mic to his mouth, "I know you're on this ship, Castiel. So here's how this goes. You show yourself…

* * *

In the Nest, Balthazar started to stir as an unfamiliar voice rang through the ship, groaning as he sat up and rubbed at his head.

* * *

The pilots froze where they were, Sam in the middle of the room where he had been pacing around, and Gabriel on the bed where he had his face buried in his hands. Both of them looked up as the bounty hunter's voice echoed in their room.

Sam visibly tensed and then glanced at Gabriel who met his eyes.

* * *

Meg stopped her movements where she was dismantling the chair in her room, working free one of the sturdy legs for a nice weapon if that guy came into her territory again. She grinned as she heard the guy speak over the P.A. This guy was damned good at his job.

* * *

Gordon kept the mic in one hand, and then turned to Dean, holding his gun to the Captain again with the other while he continued to speak,"…we finish this exchange, or you're lover's brains will be flying every which-way," he paused and pulled the mic from his mouth as he regarded Dean.

"Sorry, man, nothing personal. I'm sort of on the clock, here. It's very frustrating. You understand."

Dean gave him a helpless shrug, and they waited for a few minutes, but nothing happened. With each passing minute, Gordon seemed to start coming undone. He turned on Dean angrily, "I'm done, and you're just about done too. Now tell me where the hell he is. I know you know!"

"Dude, it's not like I keep him in my ass!"

That's when a voice rang out through the ship and Dean felt his heart leap in his chest at the familiar deep and gravelly sound.

"_You're wrong, Gordon."_

Dean almost jumped out of his skin, "Jeez, stay out of my ass, Cas!"

"_I was never…"_

A relieved smile fell on the bounty hunter's face and he broke in, "Oh, I'm not wrong, kiddo. I _will_ shoot your brother dead if you don't—"

"_You're wrong about Castiel. Castiel..he's gone. He's dead. We run the show now…."_

As he heard this, Dean felt a cold shiver run through him. What did Cas mean "dead"?

"…_They didn't want him here, but he couldn't make himself leave….So he walked into the sea and melted…melted away…They didn't know that he could do that, but he did."_

Around the ship everyone frowned in confusion and tried to work out Castiel's meaning.

Balthazar started to bite at his nails. Gabriel was about to tear out his hair…and Dean…Dean couldn't breathe.

"I'm not sure I take your meaning there," Gordon commented nicely, but he glanced at Dean as if asking for an explanation. Dean gave an absent shrug, clearly just as lost as the rest.

Cas' voice rang out harshly now and even Dean flinched, _"I'm not _on_ the ship. I'm _in_ the ship. I _am_ the ship. I am God here now."_

"Cas?" Dean called out, worried now.

"_I told you, Dean. Castiel is gone."_

"Then who exactly are we talking to?" Gordon called back.

"_You're talking to your God. And, Gordon….your God is very unhappy…"_

* * *

_Lol, this was kinda fun to write. Ah, the lovely sound of the meshing of two scripts! XD _


	13. Chapter 13

Notes: And now on to Castiel playing God for a bit. He's a very sexy God, I must admit. I would worship that...

Leahelisabeth: Lol, I shall do my best to accommodate XD And I am soooo nervous for next season! This could be amazing, or go oh so horribly wrong! I'm so scared! D:

Eri: *uber blush!* Thank you! ^.^

Disclaimer: Won't fit in my suitcase, so I don't think I can take it with me :(

* * *

CHAPTER 13

Chuck couldn't feel the entire right side of his body from where he lay on it on the hard floor. He could have easily turned over, let some blood start circulating again, but to do so he might make a sound and then that man would come back. He would hurt Chuck and Chuck knew he was a wimp when it came to pain.

Instead he just lay there as the pins and needles got worse and worse until he felt nothing. He didn't even flinch when the man's and Castiel's voices came over the P.A, even though the topic of conversation was a bit odd. Odd even for Cas.

Then he heard his name being whispered. He knew it was coming from the P.A, but it wasn't echoing in the hallway just outside the engine room. It was Castiel calling him, just him.

Painfully, Chuck raised his head for the first time in an hour to try and hear better.

"_Chuck?"_

"Cas? Cas is that you?!"

"_Indeed…you're afraid."_

Chuck nodded, as if Cas could actually see and then let out a wearied sob, "He tied me up. I don't know where he came from…he said he was going to shoot me."

"_Shh. Shh. It's okay. It's going to be okay, Chuck."_

It was kind of weird to be comforted by a guy on the ship's mic claiming to be God, but Chuck still let out a relieved breath nonetheless. Cas could see the future or something like that, right? So if he said it was going to be okay, then it should be okay. Suddenly Chuck felt a giant wave or remorse for ever having any doubt in Cas, for thinking that there was a chance that he could hurt them.

Cas must have "felt" him, _"Do not feel bad. You are forgiven."_

"But…I told him where you were. I'm sorry. I didn't know what else to do. I—"

"_Shh. I'm fine, but I need you to do something for me. You need to be brave, Chuck."_

The mechanic dropped his now heavy head back to the floor with a groan, "I'm tied up. I-I can't…I'm so sorry."

" _You know, looking through the history books, I'm not sure I would have believed our ancestor monkeys were going to make it. No offense, but I probably would have been backing the Neanderthals, because their poetry was just amazing. It's perfectly in tune with the spheres…but in the end it was us. The homo sapien sapiens. We ate the apple, invented pants…and we were also the first species to use complex tools…sharpen them for specific uses….Now don't be scared. I'm watching over you."_

Castiel's voice disappeared and Chuck glanced around, like maybe he would spot him, but then his eyes fell on the tool box where one of his metal cutters was poking out. And but damn if it didn't look like it was glowing like some holy freaking grail.

* * *

With Castiel's voice suddenly gone silent all around the ship, Gordon's calm was quickly disappearing as well and you could see his frustration levels rise like the sea in his eyes. The bounty hunter jerked his gun at Dean to get his attention, as if the Captain wasn't watching the guy who held a gun at his chest.

"Where did he go?" Gordon demanded.

Dean spread his arms wide in a clueless manner, "I can't even keep track of him when he's not incorporeally pulling a Holy Spirit of the Ship. Don't look at me, man."

Gordon's response to that was a loud curse and a rough kick to one of the pilot chairs, making Dean wince and further his fantasy of tearing this guy limb from limb for threatening to hurt his crew, and now messing with his baby.

As much as he didn't really want to, Dean couldn't help but worry about Cas' stability at this point. This was something new and just…a little unsettling. He was claiming he was no longer Castiel. What did that mean? Also…what the hell was with the "I am the ship" thing? It couldn't be true, right, cause how awkward would that be? If that was true then Dean was currently sitting on Cas, and when they put stuff in the cargo hold, it would be like storing stuff in Cas' ass.

And worst thought yet, why did Cas say that he was dead?

Once again Dean winced as Gordon kicked at the chair, even more roughly than the first time around. Not a second later Cas' voice came back harshly.

_"I highly suggest you cease kicking that."_

Ignoring how Cas happened to know what Gordon was doing, Gordon raised his face to the ceiling and shouted back, "And I highly suggest you get your ghostly ass down here before I shoot your boy!" he continued to mumble under his breath as he fiddled with his gun, "some nonsensical crap…ain't nobody who can do that…." He raised his voice again, "I know you're somewhere on this boat! Somewhere with a comm. playing games!"

A dry laugh cackled over the P.A, echoing through all the hallways and sending shivers through the whole crew.

"…That was somewhat unsettling. I swear he doesn't laugh like that normally," Dean told Gordon casually, but the bounty hunter just scowled back at him.

"Ain't nothing normal about any of this."

"_Gordon…Mr. Gordon Walker, bounty hunter. May I call you Gordy? I've heard Dean call you that a few times and I kind of like it."_

Cas' voice came back again, sounding to everyone like he was shooting the breeze over a beer the way he was talking now. Not like that booming voice from before as he claimed to be God. It was more than a little concerning that he seemed to be having these mood swings and Dean was all sorts of ready to made this right again. More than anything he just wanted to find Cas and help him through whatever kind of episode this was. He just prayed that he could fix this…

Meanwhile, Gordon snorted loudly, "Nobody calls me that."

"_Your sister does…or did as you would say. She's gone to you now. I'm sorry."_

Dean watched as Gordon's grip tightened on his gun and he smiled a bit. Looked like Cas was trying on his creepy old psychic lady shtick again. Never underestimate the power of parlor tricks. He would have loved to see what would happen if Cas read palms.

"Is that supposed to scare me? Bringing up my sister?" Gordon called back. His voice was steady, but Dean could see how his hand trembled just a bit.

"_You're a liar. I don't think your intentions are honorable. You aren't cleaning the streets of trash. You're cleaning them of life."_

Gordon frowned and Dean could see him calculating how to approach this. Clearly this was one of his more…unique jobs that he had taken on. This guy was a shoot 'em and tie 'em to his ship kind of hunter, not a talk 'em down from the tree branches kind. He was smart though, and knew that he wasn't going to get Castiel without at least making an effort to play along. It would be interesting at least for Dean to watch this play out.

"Well, Castiel…I am a bounty hunter as you have pointed out. It's not generally considered an honorable job, I'll give you that….but I live by a code, though. Which I think is worth—"

"_You hurt people."_

Dean raised his eyebrows at Gordon accusingly, small smirk on his face. It earned him a scowl in return.

"Only when the job requires it," the bounty hunter defended.

All around the room the screens of all the computers started to flash out different words, making Dean jump up from his leaning position and Gordon's whole body tense up, finally abandoning his casual and relaxed posture that seemed to define him.

LIAR. WRONG. KILLER. MONSTER. MURDERER.

Each flashed out in red or green letters, making the room an odd assortment of lights. Then the lights started to flicker and spark threateningly.

"_Wrong. You're a bad liar. You crawl inside me uninvited and you hurt my crew. I see everything that passes. I feel everything—"_

"I only hurt people because they keep getting in the way of me finding you! And I know for a fact that you are just as bad or worse than me! You've killed, Castiel. You're a monster and I need to take you in. You come with me and your crew won't need to be hurt anymore," he turned to Dean, "Tell him."

Dean tried his best at one of Sam's bitchfaces, "What? Seriously? Am I your advocate now or something?"

"You are starting now. Tell him so I don't have to hurt your crew or your brother."

The Captain rolled his eyes and leaned back against the panels with his arms crossed over his chest, "Fine…Cas? This guy is actually very…gentle….and fuzzy. A real cuddle bunny if you ask me. We're becoming fast friends. Thinking of asking him for a threesome later if you feel like spicing things up."

Castiel laughed again, and it sounded natural, like how he always laughed at Dean's horrible jokes. It made Dean smile for real as well, thinking that just maybe Cas was still in that mess doing whatever it was that he was doing. Gordon however didn't seem the least bit amused. Guy must not appreciate Dean's comic genius.

"You folks are all insane…"

Dean shrugged again, a boyish grin on his handsome features, "Well, my boyfriend is God and you could say we all had a complicated childhood."

Gordon just looked at him like he was wondering if he should put the Captain out of his misery, "Doesn't anybody care that I have a finely crafted gun pointed at this man's chest?" he snapped, once again looking up at the ceiling. Dean had to be a bit amused by that cause it actually looked like he was trying to talk to God or some crap like that.

"_I care."_

Finally Gordon felt like he was gaining some ground, "Then you are going to come out and stop me from doing what I don't want to? You going to be smart here, Castiel?...Castiel?...uh, God?"

Castiel's voice had gone away again and Dean felt a little colder.

* * *

Balthazar moaned once again as he sat up from the floor and used the ladder to become vertical. He had been listening to the back and forth of the stranger and Cassy, and needless to say he was more than a little concerned for his baby brother. When he had said that Castiel was dead, Balthazar had almost choked until his brain caught up with him and reminded him who was talking in the first place.

Still, he felt ill.

"Aww…what the hell is going on…" he moaned to himself, or he thought he had just said it to himself, but then he heard Cassy's whispering voice echo around the room.

"_I need your help again, brother. It'll be just like before."_

Still a little loopy from the hit to his head, Balthazar's first reaction to hearing his brother so close was utter panic, "Cassy, you need to hide. That man…he's-he's very blurry. You gotta be careful, darling."

He heard his brother chuckle lightly, _"I'll keep it in mind."_

As the room finally came into focus, he realized something, "Cassy? How come there's a guy on board, and how come all of a sudden you're God?"

"_I know you have questions…"_

"That would be why I just asked them."

"…_but there isn't time, brother. I need you to trust me."_

"Am I dreaming? Cause I have to tell you darling, things are a little surreal right now."

"_We all are."_

Balthazar rolled his eyes.

"_Don't make faces."_

The middle Novak looked a bit unsettled at that, but he was glad when Castiel's voice came back, more soothing than an ice pack to his head, _"Balthy…I need you to pull another daring escape. This time I'll help you get out, but I still need you to do something for me."_

"Anything, Cassy."

"_I need you to take care of Dean."_

* * *

Yay! Another Chapter done! Now time to start packing! Only a few days before I'm shipped away! :D


	14. Chapter 14

Notes: Just gonna sit here giggling cause they said that Cas is going to get a wardrobe change for next season.

Eri: Dude, I so agree XD

Disclaimer: *snort* *giggle* Lol! As if!

* * *

CHAPTER 14

Somehow this wasn't as fun as it was normally sneaking around at night. As a child, Chuck could remember countless times that he has snuck out of his room for a midnight snack or something, and how the thrill of successfully walking by his parents room was enough to make him giggle uncontrollably when he made it back to his bed with his prize.

But this time around, as Chuck eased his way around another corner in the hallway, there was no thrill, and he most certainly won't be giggling anytime soon. Another wave of gratitude washed over him as he thought about Castiel who was currently on standby with him, or his voice was anyway. It was kind of like having his own personal guardian angel, protected by some…celestial being, or God as he seemed to be claiming to the strange man over the P.A.

He reached a doorframe and came to a halt right in front of the closed hatch, hand ready on the handle.

"_Are you ready, Chuck?"_

"Nope."

But as he said this, the mechanic was already pulling the door open and slipping inside, shutting the hatch behind him as quietly as was possible with a big metal object.

* * *

"I just have to think, here…" said Gordon as he paced around the control room, his movements agitated. There were a few veins that stood out from his closely shaven head that Dean had been watching fascinated for the last few minutes, wondering if this guy was maybe on the brink of an aneurysm or something. Cas could be very frustrating at times, Dean knew this better than most. It was enough for the Captain to muse on whether one of Cas special powers was death by your blood pressure going up so high that you don't even have time for a heart attack, you just explode in one big bloody, pulpy mess.

He was just wondering how hard it would be to wash the gore from the ship's panel boards when Gordon growled loudly again and was about to kick the chair, but at the last minute thought better and lowered it back to the floor. He turned to Dean and flicked the barrel at him casually, like he was waving a stick in his face.

"These older models have locators at all?"

Dean shrugged and stuck out his bottom lip, "Won't help. It doesn't pick up incorporeal beings."

That of course set Gordon off again and his pacing continued, sometimes scratching at his head with his own weapon that was certainly not on safety. Maybe this guy would slip and kill himself, saving Dean the trouble. Wouldn't that be a way to go?

"…You know, with the exception of one deadly and unpredictable midget, this guy is the most obnoxious cargo I've ever had to transport. Yet by far the most interesting. I haven't had a hunt like this before, and as much as I love a challenge, this is freaking ridiculous. I swear, if your boy doesn't get his holy spirit down here, I'm fetching the preacher and having him do an exorcism. I'll take him back in a warded jar if I have to."

Dean squinted in confusion, "What did he do?"

"Wanted poster didn't actually say, but I know he's dangerous and I'm taking him in."

The Captain rolled his eyes and shook his head, "No, the midget. I know Cas hasn't done jack."

Instead of snapping back, Gordon actually smiled fondly, making Dean more than a little uncomfortable. It had that same irky feeling of asking as cannibal what he had for breakfast, but Gordon graciously answered, no small amount of awe and nostalgia in his voice.

"Arson…little man _loved _fire. His street name was sparky."

"…cute."

* * *

It was a wonder to Chuck that he hadn't been caught yet. Surely his harsh and erratic breathing was enough to draw the attention of everyone on this ship. There was no dirt to track, but the mechanic was sure that if the intruder wanted to track him, he could easily do so by the big drops of sweat he was leaving behind.

He crossed through the kitchen area towards the doorway that lead up to the control room, following Cas' instructions to remain completely out of sight of those in the room. He mentioned Dean and the stranger were both in there. And sure enough, he spotted the Captain first, leaning semi-relaxed on one of the panels. For a small moment he thought that maybe the intruder had already been taken care of, but then the man paced into sight, seemingly talking about something with Dean. Chuck frowned when it looked like they were just shooting the breeze, but he chalked it up to Dean having the situation under semi-control.

Sucking in a big breath so that they wouldn't hear him panting, Chuck darted past the control room and into the next hallway once the stranger's back was turned.

This guy was good. Not only did he lock the crew in their rooms, but he also was able to override the mid ship commands from that one small panel in the crew quarters, making it impossible to un-lock the doors from the same spot. Chuck didn't have controls like that in the hind ship where the engine room was, so all that was left was the control room, and that was a big no-no. Going over this plan with Castiel, Chuck had despair clinging to him like a scared sloth at the thought that he would have to somehow get up to the control room where scary people were spouting threats. At least, that was until Castiel reminded him that their locks were electric and run on magnets, not physical bars.

Chuck finally reached his goal, a small breaker box one hallway away from the control room that had all the switches for mid-ship. He had no idea how Cas had been able to think this one up, but it was simple and pure genius. All he had to do was shut down the power for the crew quarters and the magnetic locks would just come undone, no computer needed. Only thing was…there were at least thirty different switches in the box, and none of them were labeled. Normally, since mid-ship didn't contain any of the life-support, or powered engine controls, flipping random switches wouldn't be such a big deal, but this was the time for stealth and a whole bunch of lights switching on and off might draw some attention.

He ran his sweaty fingers over the black levers, mapping out the ship's wiring in his head. As amazing as a firefly model was, they weren't entirely logical in the sense of grids. It was more of a " it fits best here because of reasons" kind of thing. Chuck just had to remember those reasons.

He found himself missing Castiel's comforting and guiding voice. They were too close to the control room to risk him speaking to the mechanic and Castiel had pointed this out to Chuck before they even left the engine room, telling him that he would be watching, but it was all in Chuck's perspiring hands now.

"_You know this ship, Chuck. You've seen enough of her to reconstruct her without a manual, just from bits a pieces. You can do this task."_

He had said it with enough confidence that Chuck actually felt like he could do it, like this was a cake-walk for him, that was until he was here, almost alone and staring down thirty odd switches.

"Okay, okay…First ten are out because Cas has caused several power surges through the kitchen for me to know which ones belong there…next five…they would be for passenger quarters cause of that one time that Bobby had tried to run seven power tools at once when he was trying to fix the stairs…"

He whispered this lowly to himself, his eyes trailing down the identical rows that seemed to blur together.

"That's fifteen of them. So half way there. Uh, I know it can't be the last ten because those all go to the infirmary after Dean had me make sure everything worked down there after the…the explosion. Didn't want people dying cause an outlet was wonky….that leaves five more…"

Now, in his mind he knew that the last five were all for the crew quarters. One for the lights, one for the outlets that included the power for the locks, one for the bathrooms, one for…the emergency alarms and P.A system, and one for climate control.

Accidentally messing with most of these wouldn't draw attention, lights might flicker enough in the kitchen for the intruder to see, so he would hopefully avoid that one, but it was the alarms that would be the snake in the shadows. It was like re-setting a fire alarm, where it had to beep loudly once to let you know that they were functioning. Stupid lousy making sense mechanics that didn't help this situation in the least.

Even though it was only five switches, and he had the many working of the ship's wiring in his mind, it would take hours for Chuck to mull it all out, and he had told Cas this earlier. His only choice was to narrow it down and pray for the best. Guess it was a good thing that "God" was on his side tonight.

He slammed shut his eyes and flipped the first switch.

* * *

Balthazar was doing his best to wash the blood out of his eyes when the lights suddenly went out in the bathroom, leaving him in utter darkness.

"Cassy?...Cassy, do you think you could tell me where my towel is?"

* * *

Chuck cursed when only one quiet tap was heard over the P.A. To all others it would sound like nothing, maybe interference on the comms, but it was really a simple code that he and Castiel had worked out before leaving the engine room. One tap for no. Two for yes and get the hell back to safety.

Obviously the first switch wasn't what they needed.

His finger fell upon the second one and this time he held his breath as well as closed his eyes.

* * *

Sam looked up from where he was seated on the bed, pulling on his combat boots and lacing them up. He frowned and glanced around the room confused before turning his gaze to Gabriel who was putting on his lucky hawiian shirt.

"Gabe? Did it just get colder?"

"Are you trying to get me to warm you up, or should I go find your parka?"

* * *

The mechanic let out a whimper when a single tap was heard. There were three left, and two of them were bound to alert the stranger to their plan. One out of three might save them. He was playing freaking rock paper scissors with their lives and it wasn't fun. This wasn't a game to find out who had to do the dishes that night, this could seriously end up bad.

This time he held his breath, shut his eyes and willed his mind to some tropical paradise as he moved his fingers to the next switch, but he didn't flip it. Instead, for whatever reason, he let his fingers drop down to the fifth switch, skipping the third and fourth and flipped that one instead.

There were no alarms. His eyes were shut so he couldn't tell if darkness had fallen over the midship, but then he heard it. Two beautiful taps.

Chuck almost forgot to open his eyes again when he moved to run back to the engine room.

* * *

Odd temperature fluctuations and Gabriel's jokes on "cold flashes" aside, Sam had finally gotten his boots on and was checking every corner and hiding place in their room, hoping and praying that maybe he missed a gun, a knife, something.

Sam was just checking the tank on the toilet when Castiel's voice suddenly resounded in their room. He heard Gabriel yelp as the pilot hit his head from where he was still looking for his lost shoe under the bed.

"Cassy-bear? That you? Are you okay?"

"_I am fine Gabriel…"_

Sam continued to tear around his room as Castiel told them of his plan to get them out of their rooms and go save Dean. The younger Winchester was impressed to say the least. According to Cas, he had Chuck unlocking the rooms for them and he knew exactly where everyone was. Perhaps Gabriel would find time and energy to be impressed later because right now he was fretting over the disembodied voice of his brother, and odd thing indeed.

"Are you sure you're okay? I think I heard your breath hitch on that last word. You're not hurt are you? Is that Gordy guy kicking chairs again? Does that hurt you?"

Castiel was ignoring all of those questions, _"Gordon continues to pace the room. He is growing quite agitated. You will need to be swift when the time comes."_

"Don't worry, Cas. I can take this guy out," Sam assured him as he moved over to the nightstand, the last place he hadn't check and lifted up the flower vase.

"_He's faster than you—all of you. And he's wearing armor."_

"What about his face, is he wearing armor on his face, cause there are a few choice things I would like to do to it," Gabriel quipped from where he was now circling the ladder, like a dog waiting to be let outside.

"Bingo."

Sam pulled out one of his smallest handguns from inside the pot and removed the plastic bag protecting it from the water. He checked the barrel and then cocked it loudly, the sound echoing in the room.

"_No touching guns! Dean says no more touching guns, remember?"_

Sam glanced over at the other pilot with a worried expression that was echoed by Gabriel, but the younger Winchester placed the gun back in its bag.

* * *

Good golly gosh, only a few more days till I'm shipped out! :D So excited! MOAR PACKING!


	15. Chapter 15

Notes: Duuuuuude. I wrote 6,200 words yesterday. So happy ^.^ And it looks like this story will be 18 chapters long :D

Leahelisabeth: Hiya! No worries! Weddings are friggin awesome :D And don't you worry about Gordon ;)

Disclaimer: *goes to touch fandoms and get's wrist slapped*

* * *

CHAPTER 15

"_Balthazar? It's soon now, are you ready?"_

Balthazar nodded from where he stood at the ladder, hands clammy and clenched to the bars, "How do you know what this bastard is going to do?"

"_I'm very close to him. He doesn't even see it."_

He couldn't help it, he had to roll his eyes exasperated at that. Not for the first time Balthazar found himself a little upset at how his younger brother had all this "sight" and still didn't feel inclined to share it with the rest of the class. Cassy was nothing more than a bubble gum hoarder, he thought bitterly and punched the rungs of the ladder hard enough for the metal to vibrate under him.

Balthazar was angry. He could feel it curling in his stomach, making him feel ill. How could Cassy ask this of him? Well, perhaps Balthazar was also a bit angry with himself for letting his brother talk him into this.

"_Thank you for this, brother. I have no right to ask you for more, but…"_

"I told you. Anything for you, Cassy. You saved me from myself once. Feel I owe you for that."

Silence fell over his room and Balthazar wasn't too sure if it was Castiel being moved by this statement, or if he had just "gone away" to check on a few things. As he waited idle, he found himself looking at the ladder he was holding with his hands and wondering if Cassy was the ship, what part of his body this would be.

Perhaps thinking a little too graphically he was about to pull back his hands when Castiel's voice suddenly came back, urgent, _"Go now, brother!"_

Despite all hesitations, Balthazar didn't pause for breath before launching himself up ladder and into the corridor.

"For Cassy…"

* * *

Absently Dean had been worrying on a small tear in his pant leg in every silence between Cas' communications. They had been becoming longer and more frequent and the hole had gotten to the point where Dean was pretty sure it was bordering on inappropriate. That freckle on his upper thigh was starting to become visible, the one that Cas had a thing for and liked to nibble at sometimes. He wanted to smile at the memory, he wanted to let his mind wander back to that warm place, but he just couldn't bring himself to. There was just this aching feel enveloping him every time he looked at Gordon, like the day before you get the flu, you feel pain all over. Maybe this ache was just what he had to suffer through before this disease on his ship took away any good feeling he had left.

Gordon had not stopped his pacing, and the Captain was thinking that it was getting to the point where he would have to assign someone to replace the floor panels when the power in the control room suddenly shut down. Finally the pacing stopped, and both men were on their feet glancing around in an instant.

"_You're not welcome here anymore, Gordon."_

"You think I'm going to leave empty-handed? If you think you know me so well, then you are sorely mistaken, Castiel."

"_Sadly, I know you quite well. I wish I didn't. I wish I didn't have to feel what you feel, that slimy muck that turns your eyes black, that demonic power and energy to absorb with each and every living thing you kill. You like that sick feeling, you like to hurt people," _the absolute disgust in Castiel's voice made even Dean's stomach roll a bit in sympathy. He couldn't imagine what it was like for Cas to put himself in this creatures shoes, to feel what he felt when he saw the bounty hunter.

Gordon however didn't take offense, and shrugged absently, not apologetically at all, "It's part of the job. Each kill makes me stronger, makes me more able to come after freaks like you and make the 'verse a better place. A trade-off I'm more than willing to have."

There was a sad chuckle that came from the P.A and Dean could just picture the wide blue eyes that would be wide with meaning as he spoke, _"No, you didn't take on this job for helping others. You took it for power. Control. Pain. Revenge…Your sister knew. Sadness in her when she waved goodbye. She saw the darkness in you and ran, but the darkness caught up with her…now you claim it's all in revenge for her…You're not well."_

Dean caught a flash of something in Gordon's dark eyes when Cas brought up his sister. It wasn't the burn that Dean got himself when other's talked about his mother, his father, Sammy, or even Cas. It was more sinister than that. It wasn't pain of memory, but pure insanity, like he was possessed by something dark. Dean's whole body gave a shiver.

"You might want to be shutting up about now, Castiel. Creatures like you aren't allowed to be speaking of my sister," the bounty hunter snarled, pointing his gun to the ceiling for a moment, like he wanted to shoot at the hull, maybe thinking it would hurt Cas. Dean was a little curious about that too. If he was the ship after all, wouldn't the control room be like, his brain or something?

"_Big golden retriever sitting on the lawn…never took to you…smelling you. The neighbors pers, you did things to them too. Cleaned up after…shined and polished. Everything in here gleams for someone so dirty…."_

Now Cas was rambling and the more it went on, the faster Dean's heart started to beat. From where he sat he could see the rage growing in Gordon as Cas went on. It wouldn't be long now before the guy blew, and he hoped Cas could see that.

"I said shut the fuck up!"

"_No, you're words were "You might want to be shutting up about now". If you're going to quote yourself, you might as well be accurate about it. For someone with such a clean environment, obviously your meticulous perfection does not translate to your everyday speech."_

That was when Gordon froze solid and the rage all but disappeared as he opened his mouth in utter shock, "Are you fucking…you're—you're not in my gorramn mind, you're on my gorramn ship!"

* * *

Peeling laughter erupted from the young man as Gordon finally figured out his little game and Castiel started to clap enthusiastically over the comm. in the bounty hunter's ship to congratulate him. It came out a bit muffled however, due to the space suit's gloves that covered his hands. Still, he was happy that someone had finally caught on.

He turned his head around in a wide circle, trying to see around the edges of his space helmet as he glanced around the small cabin, running his hands over the bright control panel in front of him.

"Yes, your ship it's…very interesting. All these buttons…"

He especially liked the big bright red one on the joystick. He wasn't sure what it did, but it was certainly pretty.

* * *

"Okay, we're not touching those buttons, okay? Castiel? No touch. Bad touch."

Gordon's eyes were almost completely bugged out of his head, and Dean did try his best to smother his laughter, but instead it came out as a very undignified snort that went straight to a fit of very manly giggles. It was just too much. Here Dean was wondering if it would ever be possible to kiss Cas again without it being super awkward, only to find out that Cas was just chilling out in this guys' ship, it was just too perfect and he was having a hard time thinking of a time where he felt more relived.

He was still half hunched over and trying to gain control of his laughter when Gordon whirled on the Captain, gun raised to his chest once again, "How the hell did he get on my ship?!"

"_No Touching Guns! Put it away, Gordon!"_

It was the first time that Dean had ever heard Cas yell like that and his laughter died faster than Sam's goldfish. Even Gordon looked a little sheepish.

"Uh, okay…I'm putting the gun away…"

Only he didn't. He was probably thinking that since "God" was no longer present, there wasn't anyone actually watching. Guy clearly didn't know who he was messing with.

"_No you're not…" _Cas sing-songed over the P.A.

Gordon gave the ceiling a dirty look, "I'm putting it away…because we're all _reasonable_ people…don't want to do anything rash…fiddling with any dials…" He kept on talking, gun lowering to his side, but not putting it back in his holster.

"_You're not right, Gordon. You're not righteous. You've got issues."_

Cas sounded so sincere, it was like Dean was sitting in on a therapy session. Hell, Dean could practically hear the air quotes in Cas' voice as he said "issues" and it brought a half smile to his face.

"No!" Gordon bit out, but then sighed and gritted his teeth, "Well, I suppose I might have a few things to work through. You might have me a bit figured out, then. Good job. I'm not %100."

"_You talk too much."_

Gordon nodded, still not putting his gun away. He was trying to distract Cas…

"I'm flawed in that way. I sometimes go on. It's been said…"

"_Stop. Just…stop. I don't want to hear any more lies. I don't want to feel people lying to me any more. I can't deal with all the double-speak. I can't deal with mouths saying one things, but the heart saying something else. I'm-I'm going with you Gordon," _came the tragic statement.

Dean stepped forward, eyes to the ceiling as well, no matter how ridiculous he might look, "Cas, what are you—"

A half sob came over the P.A that was quickly stifled, _"I don't belong, Dean. Dangerous, like you, but…worse. I can't be…controlled. Can't be trusted…Like housing a wolf and pretending it's domestic. You could finally rest. Maybe I could to. It feels like...I've been on the run forever."_

* * *

In Gordon's ship, Cas was idly fiddling with one of the buttons on the panel, running his finger over it, but not pressing down. He tried not to notice how the glass of his helmet was starting to fog up as tears started to make their way down his face. He would have to stop if he wanted to see…but maybe it would be nice to not see anything right now.

It was odd, the thing that Castiel wanted more than anything to see right now, was also the thing he was glad that he could not see right now. Surely Dean's handsome and caring face would make him reconsider, make him stay, but Castiel just couldn't do that. This was what was best for everyone.

Best for his brothers. Best for Sam. Best for Bobby, Anna, Chuck, even Meg….best for Dean.

And maybe, just maybe, this was best for Castiel as well.

* * *

Gabriel and Sam stood under the hatch, clutching to each other and the ladder as they listened to Cas and the bounty hunter talk.

Sam could feel just how upset the other man was, he felt it in the tremors that ran through his whole body, he didn't need to hear what Gabriel was mumbling. The anguish was obvious in his voice alone.

"I can't let him go back there. Sam, they'll hurt him. He'll never be the same again. He's so broken. He'll shatter, I know it. Sam, we have to save him…"

"We will, we will. Dean won't let it happen, I promise. Dean will fix this."

He had spent the last 24 years of his life strong in the belief that his big brother could fix anything, and he wasn't about to let them down now.

* * *

"_Everyone could just go on without me and not have to worry anymore. Not have to feel tired. Not have to be scared for or of me. This is what's best."_

As Cas continued to speak, Dean started shaking his head so hard that it was making him dizzy.

"_People could be what they wanted to be. No longer held back by the one who took away their freedom, the thing they want more than anything…"_

* * *

Silently, Chuck helped Bobby sit up from the floor as they both listened to Cas' voice drift over the whole ship. This was his goodbye to them. They could hear the finality in his voice, saying things that were crazy, ludicrous, but at the same time sounding so sane and sincere, like this was all he ever thought about for a long time. This was his choice.

It hurt more than it should have knowing that this was Cas' choice, that they had all unintentionally alienated him, and drove him away. It was their fault Cas felt this way.

* * *

"_You could all finally live simply…no secrets…safe."_

"No. Cas, please no. This isn't you. This isn't you…." There was no answer, "I know you can hear me, Cas. It's me. We're family. We need you….I need you."

"_I-I'm sorry, Dean. I'll be fine…I just have to go now…I'll be your bounty, Gordon Walker."_

"Cas, no!"

"_I'll just fade away, Dean. Like a dream when you wake up. You won't remember me after long."_

Dean was too heartbroken to even make a noise, his mouth just hung open in horror as his world started to crumble around him. Gordon on the other hand looked mighty pleased and slapped the stunned Captain on the shoulder, "Finally, something goes according to—"

He didn't have time to finish his sentence, because Dean had already tackled the bounty hunter to the floor. Dean wasn't about to keep waiting for an opening, he just decided to make one instead.

He felt satisfaction that the first punch he landed drew blood.

"Who's the danger now?"

* * *

Castiel heard Gordon's voice get cut off with a mighty roar from Dean. There were the sounds of flesh hitting flesh, grunts and growls, but the fight was over before it had even begun as the sound of a gun discharged.

Cas doubled over in his seat in phantom pain and his eyes darted back and forth frantically, "Dean?"

Castiel screamed.

* * *

Schmeep! Sorry for the cliffy . But next chapter should make up for it tomorrow! ;)


	16. Chapter 16

Notes: Hello all! Here's the next chapter and please enjoy! *Especially those brave and persevering readers (I know there are about 50 new readers in the last week) who only started reading this series five days ago and have already caught up. Kudos* And also, where did you guys come from?! Part I was nearly untouched for months and all of a sudden there are 90 new visitors in one week!? And hearts and hugs to my readers who have been with me from the beginning! You guys are amazing!

leahelisabeth: I know! I just want my babies to be happy, but the stories have me doing the complete opposite D'X Gotta add in a fluffy bit soon...

evelyn: Lol! My many apologies! I hope that this longer than usual chapter makes up for it luvy!

Disclaimer: Like a fancy car and that really cool shirt I saw for $40 today, I do not own this.

* * *

CHAPTER 16

It took Dean a few seconds to register why he was on the floor clutching at his bloody thigh, and then a few moments more for it to kick in that it hurt like a bitch. Absently he was still able to note that the bullet had gone straight through the hole that he had been fretting over earlier. At least he would only have one hole to stitch up later.

Castiel's scream was still ringing in his ears, but it could have also been the gun shot as well. Either way, they were not very pleasant sounds and he would love to never hear either again.

Gordon's shadow loomed over the Captain, smirking over the fallen man with the gun still pointed at his chest, "Well, you can blame this one on yourself. Now I'm going to go find me my hawk. It was…interesting meeting you, Dean Winchester."

"You son of a bitch! You keep your dirty hands off of him!"

A loud smack echoed through the control room and Dean felt half his face burning from where Gordon had slapped him soundly. A gloved finger was raised in front of Dean's face, "Hey, that's my mother you're talking about," he said in a deadly calm, and Dean knew for sure that their neighborhood friendly bounty hunter had caught his prey and the hidden message in his voice told Dean that nothing else would stand in his way now. Dean was no longer needed as bait, and therefore was lucky to still be alive.

The gun was shoved once again in his line of vision, oh how sick he was of seeing that thing, and then Gordon was gone, making his way out of the control room and down the hallway. Only then did Dean launch to his feet, or tried to at least, using the walls to hold him up.

He did his best to ignore the shooting flames that were moving up and down his leg, or the hot drips of blood that were now streaming down and staining even more of his pants. His fingers clenched over the wound, trying to stem the flow, but all he did was squeeze more blood over his fingers.

"Cas! I know you can hear me! He's coming to you now! You better run. I'll never forgive you if you don't run….please!"

There was no answer.

* * *

Gordon had let a smooth smile slide over his features as he made his way towards the hallway with the hatch that would lead him back to his ship, or as it was right now, his ship was more like a bear-trap holding his prey captive.

As he moved along he prepped the tranquilizer gun he had on the back of his belt, jamming the wickedly sharp and unnecessarily large needle into place. Looking at his choice weapon he could see why Castiel might think that he liked, even enjoyed hurting people. It was a very large needle after all.

"Just hang tight, kiddo. Gordon's on the move and I'll be there in a jiffy."

* * *

Dean was half out of the control room after Gordon when Sam came into sight along with Gabriel. It was a welcome sight indeed and Dean let himself breath for a moment, but only a small moment.

"Sam! He's going after Cas! He's going to take him back to the Host! He—"

"Dean! I know, we heard everything. We'll stop them, just sit down and let Gabe take care of you—"

Dean violently shook his head, "No! Get Cas first, please!"

Even though Dean was yelling at his brother to go, desperate tears burning at his eyes, he was still gripping Sam's arm hard enough to bruise. Thankfully Sam didn't even flinch and instead gripped Dean's shoulders with the same strength.

"We'll get them, Dean. I'll bring him back, but you need to stay here. There is no way Cas will ever forgive me if I leave you to bleed out on the floor."

Then Balthazar came into the room and regarded the three men, "Sam, Gabe. You two go after Cassy and I'll watch Dean. I promised him I would…but please, bring him home."

Both pilots nodded before tearing off down the hall, leaving Dean panting and bleeding against the silent and pale Balthazar.

Dean wanted to scream and shout, and throw a tantrum that he was stuck here waiting on someone else to save Cas, but he would at least take comfort that it was Sam who was doing it. Sam never lied to him. He would get Cas back.

* * *

Gordon's goal was coming into sight as he rounded the corner that led to the escape hatch. He grabbed his space helmet from the small corner that he had stashed it in earlier and slipped it over his head, letting it click into place. For all his years of being the best bounty hunter, the most dangerous, he had finally let his guard down and it cost him.

It was being hit from behind by a transcar and he fell forward hard, only his helmet saving him from his skull cracking against the metal flooring. His instincts kicked in at that point and before he even gained his bearings he was already flipped on his back and wormed his way back into a standing position facing whatever had hit him.

He came face to face with the snarling face of Sam Winchester, his teeth bared and angry flush of red in his cheeks. He only barely caught a glimpse of the eldest Novak behind him and Gordon made a quick calculation. Two of his animals had escaped their cages. There was little hope to re-capture Gabriel, but Castiel was more than enough. There was no reason to drag this out.

Lightning quick, Gordon pulled out his tranq-gun and shot wildly over Sam's shoulder. He didn't need to aim well, just hitting his target was more than enough, and by the sharp intake of air he had been successful.

The younger Winchester turned around at the distressed cry and that was all that Gordon needed. He started to run down the hall again, leaving them behind.

"Gabe? How bad is it?"

Gabriel looked down at his left bicep where a freaky looking needle was sticking out, the heavy weight of it pulling it at a very uncomfortable angle and causing even more pain. Roughly he tried to tear it from his arm, but his fingers fumbled and only jostled it, sending more pain through his arm.

"It's-it's a tranq. I've seen these puppies before when-when the Host was still brand new, more of a day-care."

Sam's eyes were wide and fearful, "Are you going to be okay," he asked as he pulled it gently from the pilot's flesh. Already he could see Gabriel's eyes drooping shut.

"I'll be fine in- in a f-few hours. Now stop f-fretting over me you b-big lug and go save Cas. We- we're counting on you."

As torn as Sam felt, he didn't even pause to say goodbye and was on his feet in a matter of seconds. Gordon would probably already be outside, or getting there. Sam was out of time and he didn't know how he would be able to anything once Gordon was within range of his ship.

He was just getting around the corner and felt his heart drop when he saw the hallway empty and the hatch already shut, blinking light saying that the airlock was in use. He was too late.

"Um, Sam?"

Sam turned to Chuck who was standing there awkwardly holding up a spacesuit in his hands, "Um, Cas didn't say that I should have this, but I thought you might need it once he said…once he said he was leaving."

Sam could only nod his gratitude and started to pull on the prepped suit.

* * *

"God damnit, Cas! It's not too late! Get your sorry ass down here and we can talk about this! You don't need to leave!"

Dean 's voice was going hoarse from yelling again and again. It served as a nice distraction as Balthazar and the newly arrived Bobby worked on his leg. He had refused any sort of painkiller or anesthetic, so their tendings were more than a little painful, but it was nothing compared to how Dean would feel if they lost Cas tonight.

Balthazar had been remaining rather quiet, almost mute as he only responded to questions with a shake or nod of his head. Dean knew that he was in a sort of shock. Whatever Cas had said to him before, obviously it had a profound effect on the middle Novak.

Would none of them get out of this okay?

He groaned into Bobby's arm, half from the pain in his leg, the other half from his heart.

* * *

Up in the bounty hunter's ship, Cas was hugging his knees to his chest as he rocked back and forth, tears streaming down his face. He could see the Impala outside of the windshield, but sadly not through any of the windows. He would probably never see the interior of that lovely vessel again.

Still, he let his fingers trail over the glass and imagined that he was touching Dean again, feeling that soft skin under his own.

"You need to stay strong, Castiel. Stay strong for Dean. This is all for Dean. This is what's best…right?"

For the first time in the last six hours, Cas let himself purposefully reach out to touch his tendrils to Dean, to seek out that familiar warmth, only…Dean wasn't warm. Not at all. He was ice-cold. That wasn't right. Cas leaving was supposed to be a good thing. Why did it feel like Dean's soul was already ripped away?

He heard Dean's mind and body scream out for him and he imagined that maybe the Captain was also doing so with his voice. This time he bent his forehead onto the cool glass and closed his eyes, like he was leaning on Dean's broad and warm chest and whispered to him like he did when they slept in bed together, "Shh. Shh, Dean. It's okay. Please….Don't cry for me."

Then Gordon's voice echoed around the small cabin and Cas turned to see the bounty hunter coming out of one of the emergency airlocks. He seemed to be taking his time, but that was probably due to the limp that he was sporting, courtesy of both Dean and Sam tackling him to the ground. He let himself smirk a little at that.

"_You made the right move, Castiel. Best for you to go on with Gordon. Best for everyone here. Best for you to go on home."_

Home? Castiel thought to himself. Many times those who resided in the Host with him had called that place home, but Castiel had never been one of those. Those cold, white walls and the lonely hallways…those scientists and soldiers who would look upon him in disgust, sometimes even fear. Their thoughts were even worse and made Castiel flinch whenever he saw one of them walk by his room. Nothing at all like the Impala.

No. The others in the Impala never looked at him like some freak of nature, well, maybe Meg, but even she never looked at him like he was trash. Anna and Chuck, even if they were scared, they never let it show on their faces. Bobby, he never showed Cas anything but a gentle caring, not indifference. His brothers loved him, he felt it even when he wasn't in the same room as them. Sam treated him like a brother even, his gratitude for how Cas made Dean happy was always present even if he never said anything…

Dean loved him for everything he was. Eyeballs to entrails.

Had Castiel made a mistake?

* * *

Finally Gordon was able to holster his weapon. It would be useless out here in the black anyway, and Castiel wouldn't fight him. His prey was actually agreeing to come with him, and he snorted at the absurdity at this whole night. So much trouble just to have his little hawk just fly on to his arm to be tied down. This was definitely going to be the story he told next time he went to his favorite bar.

He didn't even mind the sharp pain in his ankle from where two Winchesters had twisted it under him by tackling him to the ground. He pulled out his tranq-gun again to reload, "Now, I don't want you getting all worked up on the long ride back, so I've got a little something to help you sleep. That okay with you?" he didn't wait for a response and just continued on as the giddy relief of another job almost done overwhelmed him, "Yup, Castiel. Gonna be a long ride home for you. But it'll be fine. It's where you belong after all."

A heavy hand fell on his shoulder and Gordon whipped around to face once again, a very livid looking Sam outside with him. Once again instincts kicked in and Gordon whipped up the tranq-gun to point at Sam, but this time the younger Winchester was more than ready for it and knocked it harmlessly out of his hands and let it fly off into the black and out of their reach.

"You really think so? Cause some of us feel differently."

Sam held a knife, a kitchen knife of all things in his hands thanks to Chuck's quick thinking, and lashed out quickly, noting that Gordon's gun was still in its holster. He would have to keep the bounty hunter on edge if he wanted to keep that gun there.

He struck again, but missed as Gordon bent in half to avoid the knife aimed for his abdomen. All it would take was one little tear and he would lose the pressure in his suit. It would be a toss-up from there whether he would die by organ implosion or oxygen deprivation first, but Sam didn't care so long as this guy was blue and bloated.

Now, fighting in zero-gravity was very different. It was like fighting in slow motion, only your brain was still going at normal speed. It could get very frustrating very fast not having your body react as quickly as you had hoped, and it was easy to lose balance as well. Gordon seemed to know this and he and Sam both had their legs wide apart to hold as much balance they could. The threat of the black around them was constantly on their minds.

He saw out of the corner of his eye Gordon reaching for his gun so Sam took advantage of the limp he had noticed and struck out with his leg, effectively making both of them stumble, but at least Gordon's hand was removed from his hip to frantically reach for a hand hold on the Impala.

Stumbling out here is space wasn't like on a planet. You wouldn't just fall over, you would fall…wherever the last bit of force was directed. With Gordon it was just kicking his feet out from under him, almost getting him kicked out in the open, only Sam however didn't calculate the distance between him and the bounty hunter and how the Winchester would be a hand-hold as well.

Then they were both airborn, and Sam no longer felt the Impala underneath his feet. It kind of felt like his stomach left him too as he realized that he was now free-floating through space, a nightmare to almost anyone who knew the danger that this meant.

He felt Gordon pry at his right hand where he still held the knife and clenched his fingers tighter around the hilt, but then Gordon's knee somehow found the sore spot on Sam's leg where his leg was broken not even a week ago.

Sam cried out and the knife was finally knocked from his hand and that too went flying away. Now all that was left was Gordon's gun.

Sam was going to reach for it when he felt a sharp tug against the collar of his suit and he was ripped from Gordon's arms. He saw the shocked look on the man's face as Sam registered the arms around his chest and half turned to see Castiel behind him, also floating in open air, his face grim behind the mask.

"Cas?"

"Don't fight it, Sam."

And before Sam could even say another word, Castiel swung them around and let go of Sam, only to kick him squarely in the back and sending Sam hurtling back to the Impala. He landed with a hard clang against the hull and he scrabbled for a hand hold, only daring to breath again when he found one. Only then did he turn around to see what had become of Cas.

He cried out when he saw. The ricochet force that Cas delivered sent him flying backwards, right back at Gordon. For every force, there is an equal and opposing force, and that had sent Cas flying straight towards that psycho who still had a gun.

* * *

Cas let himself calmly float into the bounty hunter to grabbed on to him desperately, a purely instinctive reaction to hold on to something as he hurtled through space. Or maybe he was still rather protective of his "prize", either way Castiel didn't much care. This wasn't over yet.

Gordon wrapped his arms around Cas from behind, pinning the smaller man's arms to his sides. He seemed to be done with talking finally. Probably still a little too concerned with his impending doom to keep an idle chatter going.

What Gordon failed to notice however was how by pinning Cas' arms at his side, his hand was right at level with his gun's holster and Cas wasted no time in taking it out for him.

The bounty hunter didn't even seem to notice until Cas rocked his head back violently, the metal shell of his helmet cracking dangerously against the polymer glass of Gordon's. The hit loosened Gordon's grip just enough for Cas to turn around and point the barrel of the gun at the new crack in Gordon's helmet. The other man froze.

"Now look at this. Hunter becomes the hunted, and the hunted saves the day. How strange."

Gordon scowled at him, eyes interchanging between looking at the gun and Castiel.

"Do it. Do it, Castiel. Show me the monster you really are," he taunted and watched the emotions play over the man's face.

For a moment he thought that maybe he had won, that Castiel would lower the gun, but then a small smile crept over his face.

"A monster would imprison you, cut you open. Cut you away. A monster would send more monsters after you when you run away. A monster you drag you back to the ship where I would let Dean do what he pleases with you. Truthfully, I think this fate is best for all of us."

Gordon rolled his eyes, but they shot right back at Cas when he tapped at the crack in the helmet again, "Oh, and it's not Castiel. It's Cas."

There was no time for response because once again Cas lifted his legs and kicked as hard as he could and sent Gordon shooting away from him, even further into space, only this time Cas' flight path was right back to the Impala.

He was able to see Gordon's face as he was propelled back. It was one of amazed horror, and that suited Cas just fine.

* * *

Sam watched from below as Cas and Gordon drifted further and further away and it took everything he had not to throw up in his suit as he waited for the gun to discharge, for Cas to suddenly jerk as the bullet ripped through him, for his suit to start spewing oxygen and then watch as the pressure left. There would be no saving him after that. It would only take one small shot, even to an arm it would be deadly.

What would Dean say? What would he do?

Then there was a sudden movement as Cas whirled around in Gordon's arms, and Sam let out a cry, but that cry was nothing like the one he gave when Cas seemed to jerk back away from the bounty hunter suddenly.

He believed for that small moment that Cas had been shot, but there was no gas trail of leaking oxygen, and Cas didn't seem to be moving in any distressed manner.

"Cas!?"

* * *

It was taking too long. The force of his kick didn't seem to have been enough energy to get him back to the Impala, he wouldn't make it back.

Instead of letting the icy feel of space flow through his veins, Cas calmly lifted the gun up that he still held in his hands. Somewhere in the distance he could hear Sam calling for him frantically. And if he tried even harder, he thought he might actually hear Dean calling to him as well.

Idly he looked over the weapon, noting the fine workmanship, the sleek exterior. It was a small weapon, easily held in the palm of his hand. It was so fascinating that something so small could cause so much damage…hold so much power…

Cas slipped the safety off and raised the barrel. This would work nicely.

* * *

Sam's whole body jerked as he saw the gun discharge, the silence of space at least sparing him hearing the shot. Had Cas just shot himself? After all this, he ended it like that? How could he think that they would be better off without him? How Dean would be better off without him?

Didn't he see how Dean had changed for the better since Cas had arrived?

"Cas!" he called out again, but it came out more like a sob as he imagined the pain that Dean would feel when Sam returned to tell him that he had failed. He didn't want to, but he looked up again to see what was becoming of Cas…only to still not see any oxygen trail.

He frowned in confusion as the gun discharged again, and somehow Cas had gotten closer since he had last looked. Then he saw why. Castiel was angled on his back and was shooting the gun out away from him, using the discharge's force to propel him towards the Impala.

Little fucking genius was using the gun as a rocket.

Sam couldn't stop smiling as Cas slowly but surely made his way back down to the Impala. He was still smiling as Cas gently glided right down to Sam who held his arms out to safely guide Cas until his feet touched the hull.

Even then he kept his hands gripped to one of Cas' arms when he was standing on his own. The smaller man smiled shyly back up at Sam, hesitantly meeting his eyes, "Permission to come aboard?"

Sam chuckled and clapped him on the shoulder lightly, "You know, you aren't quite right."

"It's the popular theory."

"Well, come on, let's get back inside. Dean is probably refusing to get some rest until he knows you're alright. Bet you're in for quite the lashing though. Not just from Dean, but I bet your brothers have a thing or two to say," Sam said with an accusing eyebrow raised.

"Ah, yes. Of course. My guess is both Gabriel and he are refusing to do what they are told until we both return."

They shared a knowing smirk and Cas sighed dramatically, "They take so much looking after."

* * *

Phew! That was a long one XD Two more chapters to go! :D


	17. Chapter 17

Notes: Fluff, fluff, fluff...wish I had some peanut butter to go with it!

Leahelisabeth: Schmoopiness! Two whole chapters of it XD

evelyn: *indescribable happy noise* I'm feeling the love! =^.^=

Eri: Thank you so much! Gotta play up all that man-angst, am I right?

Disclaimer: *too distracted by watching Mulan and Pocahontas on tv to notice I still don't own anything*

* * *

CHAPTER 17

Dean had refused, hollered, and yes even begged that Bobby and Balthazar not move him from the control room, just because he wanted to stay there just in case Cas came back on the P.A. He wouldn't pass up the chance to ream him out and tell him to get his ass back in the Impala. However, as much as Dean protested, he was rather weak thanks to the blood loss and it was easy for the other two men to carry Dean to the infirmary.

That didn't stop him from cussing them out every step of the way. He didn't shut up until he caught sight of a limp Gabriel being carried between Chuck and Meg. His thoughts flew to his brother and if he knew about the pilot's condition.

"Hey! Hey, Chuck! How is he? Is it bad?"

The mechanic glanced up from where he and Meg had dumped Gabriel on the second bed in the corner and shrugged, "He's breathing fine. If I didn't know better I would say he's just sleeping."

Meg stepped away from the pilot and stood at Dean's side where he had just been hoisted up onto the main bed, his leg quickly propped up on a pillow courtesy of Balthazar. She was looking rather surly, probably because she got left out of all the action, but she calmly held out her hand to drop a shiny object into Dean's lap.

Hesitantly, and very carefully, Dean picked up the empty needle to inspect.

"Found on the floor next to him. It's a strong tranq, I've seen it before lots of times. Won't hurt him, but he'll have a killer headache when it wears off," she informed him roughly, like the free information was giving her physical pain to share.

He nodded his thanks and she took that as her leave, but Dean stopped her.

"Meg…the combo to the safe is 12-10-19."

She smiled, knowing that Dean was giving her permission to re-claim her weapons and she actually skipped off to go do so. Never again would Dean leave his crew defenseless. Not after all this. Hell, he was planning on making Chuck keep a gun in his engine room from now on as well.

"You sure that's a good idea? I don't know about you, but I certainly felt safer knowing that she didn't have access to guns."

At the sound of Anna's soft voice drifting in the room, Dean whipped his head around to face the Companion with a half-smile, "I'll be able to afford her paycheck this month, so I'm not worried about her turning at least for another few weeks. Are you doing okay?" he asked, noting the small bit of blood left on her lips from where she was struck. She startled a little bit at the inquiry, her hand gently probing her lip as if she had forgotten it was hurt in the first place.

"It's-I'm fine. I'm not the one with a bullet in his leg."

"Yeah, well, it'll be taken care of soon enough," Bobby commented mildly from where he was stacking clean gauze over the wound. The preacher cast a look over to Gabriel who had just started snoring loudly. The sight made Dean's heart clench a bit, a little bit of jealousy that the pilot could be dead to the world, not worrying over what the hell was going on somewhere else on his ship.

It had been a good fifteen minutes since Gordon had taken off. Fifteen minutes since Sam had taken off after him. Fifteen minutes since he had last heard from Cas.

Despair rolled over him as an image came to mind of Sam dead or injured somewhere having failed to stop the bounty hunter and now Gordon was already flying off, Castiel in his clutches…

He couldn't help but let a small whimper escape his lips as he tried to will the image away and he felt Bobby eye him with concern, probably thinking the sound was due to the gaping wound in his leg. Dean wouldn't correct him, mostly because if he opened his mouth he wasn't sure if he would be able to keep himself from crying out for his brother and Cas.

Off to the left, Anna quietly slipped out of the room, letting the others take care of the Captain, and Dean watched her go sadly. He felt Chuck move closer to him, the nervous mechanic wringing his hands, "Dean, um, I'm sure Sam will be back soon with Cas."

Dean still couldn't speak, so he just nodded absently and focused his eyes on the bright light above him, not at the absent people from the room.

"Dean, I need to get that bullet out, son. You want me to put you under or do you want a local?"

With a heavy sigh, Dean mulled it over. It would be so easy to let himself take a break from reality for a bit, but he just couldn't do that until he knew what had happened.

"Just the local, Bobby."

He waited for the small prick of the needle to his leg, but it hadn't come yet. Wanting to see what was taking Bobby so long, Dean finally took his eyes off of the surgical light and tried to blink away the green and purple spots dancing in his vision. He thought he spotted Bobby, but then there were two more figures hobbling into sight, one, the very large one, leaning heavily on the smaller one.

His eyes watered and Dean started to blink even faster, wanting to see if maybe it was real. Then he could see them, plain as day standing there at the door to the infirmary. They looked terrible, but it was probably one of the most beautiful sights he had ever seen besides the first time he laid eyes on the Impala.

Sam and Cas were both covered in sweat and his brother seemed to be limping badly again. Still, as far as he could tell there were no signs of blood on either of them and that was something, almost as much of something as the fact that both of them were here. Still here.

He wanted to call out, but his throat suddenly felt incredibly tight, but it didn't matter because Cas had already launched himself forward, latching his arms around the Captain's neck and burying his face there.

"I'm so sorry, Dean. I'm so sorry."

Still at a loss for words, Dean turned to Sam who was checking on Gabriel. His brother shrugged and offered a small smile, "He changed his mind. Wanted to come home."

Cas was still mumbling against the skin of his neck and Dean could feel the wet drips of tears on his collar, "I'm sorry I tried to leave. I thought it was best. I'm sorry."

"Shh…Shh, Cas. It's okay. You're here. You're home."

Finally Cas pulled his face back, utterly wrecked and shook his head, "You're hurt. Bobby is hurt. Anna is hurt. Gabriel and Sam are hurt. Balthazar is hurt….I caused all this. It's not fine."

"Boy, none of this is your fault. You blame that dick who calls himself a bounty hunter. Now stop your crying and help us clean up his mess. You can start with this piece of work here," Bobby said harshly, but to Cas it was as good as a hug and a mug of hot chocolate.

He nodded and turned his attention to Dean's leg, hands hovering over the wound.

"The bullet is still in there. I need it removed if I'm to heal it."

The preacher nodded in agreement, "I was just about to give him a local and take it out. If you're going to be healing him then I don't have to be careful in the removal. Be nice and fast," commented Bobby as he prepped the anesthetic for the Captain, but Castiel shook his head.

"Not necessary," and before anyone could say anymore on the matter, Cas had placed his hand over the leg, fingers finding their way around the gauze and like magic, all the pain flew away and Dean felt nothing besides the warmth of Cas' hands.

Of course, Bobby remained un-phased and just grabbed a pair of surgical tweezers and dove them into the flesh, digging around quickly for the bullet, not at all worried about causing the Captain any pain if the blissful look upon his face was any indication as to how he felt.

Dean's eyes were moving between staring at Castiel, still at his side, and at Bobby as he dug around in his thigh. It should have been alarming, Bobby tearing through there like he was looking for the prize in a bag of snacks and not feeling anything, but he couldn't even begin to care as he looked up to meet those blue eyes looking back.

His eyes drifted again to where Cas had grasped the Captain's hand in his own, his thumb gently stroking the skin on the back of his hand. Dean actually felt a sort of loss when Cas removed his hand once Bobby had finally pulled out the bullet, the metal clink of it in a pan alerting the others to this retrieval.

There was a shuffle of movement on both sides of Dean's bed and Bobby picked up his coat, and Sam and Balthazar somehow maneuvered and incredibly groggy Gabriel against their sides. They didn't say anything and just nodded to Cas and Dean before stepping out of the room, leaving them alone to finish the healing.

Dean wasn't sure, but he thought he saw a nervous look cross over Cas' features as the others left, but it was replaced by a look of pure concentration as his gaze settled on Dean's leg.

He must have noticed Dean's confused glance as well when they left and sighed, "I'll find both of them later if I have mojo left to heal them with. Anna as well. I saw that her lip was swollen and I'm sure that won't do for her business. Chuck has a bit of rope burn, but he told me earlier that he was fine. Still, I would like to take care of those as well. Balthazar I believe is suffering from a headache, but he never likes me healing him—"

"Cas. It's okay. They don't blame you for anything. Gabriel will be up soon enough and he can take care of it. You don't have to go around sacrificing yourself because you feel guilty," Dean told him firmly and cutting him off from his nervous rambling, but the smaller man's shoulders only relaxed marginally. He moved his face closer to Dean's leg, probably to hide the emotions rolling over his face, but Dean could still read him just fine by profile.

He felt Cas' breath ghost over the wound as he spoke, "Lately I seem to be more adept at getting people hurt rather than healing them."

Dean ignored him and grabbed a sponge from the tray of surgical tools. He eyed the sweat that was starting to bead on Cas' forehead as the healing continued, "Can I mop your brow? I'm at the ready with the fearsome brow-mop. Can't have you dripping sweat onto your sterile area and all that crap."

That finally pulled a small smile from him and Dean gave himself a mental pat on the back.

Cas didn't respond and they remained in silence until the healing was complete, only a pink area of skin left and an odd almost but not really ache in his leg. Even with it completed, Dean still raised the sponge up to Cas' face, gently dabbing the material over the skin. Cas was doing that weird staring thing where it was like he was reading Dean's face like a billboard, but didn't mind it so much now.

But then something shifted in the room, and Cas' eyes were no longer trying to read him and were instead begging Dean for something and also starting to shine bright with tears. Soon Dean wasn't mopping up sweat, but dabbing at tears.

Without words, Dean dropped the sponge and pulled Cas down until they were both laying on the bed, Cas' face buried against his chest. There was some rustling of sheets as Cas pulled the blanket over them both and then laced their fingers together, hands rested on the Captain's chest.

"Did you know that families of otters sleep holding hands, so that they won't float away from each other."

Cas' head bounced a bit as Dean chuckled, the vibrations making his chest shake, "I'm not letting you float away, Cas. I promise."

"Because I'm family?"

"Because you're family and this is your home."

"Are you still angry with me?"

Dean's chest moved again as he heaved a heavy sigh and Cas clenched his eyes shut and waited for the rage to build, rage that he deserved, but instead he felt Dean's other hand move up to comb through his hair, coming to rest on the back of his head.

"I'm…I'm not angry. God knows that I should be—"

"I'm not God anymore, Dean."

"It's an expression, Cas. And I don't know why I'm not reaming you out for trying to jump ship, but know that if you try it again that I will hunt you down and drag you back here no matter how much you kick and scream."

"It seems that a lot of people wish to do that to me."

This time the laugh that tore from Dean felt like it was some hybrid with a pained groan, "Yes. Seems like it, but this is your home. You belong here so it makes it okay."

"I see."

He felt Dean's arms move so that they encircled him and pulled tight, somehow managing to keep their joined hands together. They stayed like that for a while, the only sound they could hear was the sound of the engine humming away like it always did.

And even though the mid-ship area was a bit colder than usual, he wasn't entirely sure why that was, Dean felt a rush of warmth run through him. His boat was still his, his crew was safe, his family was still here, and Cas was in his arms. He had almost lost so much tonight, but by some miracle, some act of God or whatever, things were okay.

Cas frowned as Dean's chest started to move in small jerks, not laughter, not a sighs…

"Dean? Are you crying?"

A loud sniff was heard, "No, I just…I had something manly in my eye."

Cas glanced up with a doubtful look, "You're crying, but you're happy. I can feel that."

This time it was a sigh that moved Dean's chest, "Yeah. Yeah, I'm happy."

"Good."

As the exhaustion of the healing finally hit, Dean could feel Cas melt into his side, warm and present and drooling in his sleep. It wasn't too long before Dean followed suit, face buried in a nest of dark hair.

* * *

One more chapter to go! :D


	18. Chapter 18

Notes: AHHHHHHHH! It's the last chapter of the last episode! AHHHHH! It has been 204 days, 468,125 words, and a ridiculous amount of disclaimers and I'm still not done! AHHHHH! I can't believe how far we've all come! You guys are amazing for sticking with me so far! It's really cool to have 200 people sign on every day to read the new chapter. HEARTS TO ALL OF YOU! Anyway, this chapter serves as a fluffy interlude as well as a set up for the next set of stories.

Leahelisabeth: I know! Otters are so freaking cute and that whole hand holding thing is just...precious . And I freaking love the fluffy moments. I hope to add butt loads (lol, pun intended) more fluff and smexy in the next story for both Sabriel and Destiel. Can't wait!

Evelyn: Omg! I love it when you guys pick out my favorite lines XD You are too amazing!

Disclaimer: It's day 204...are people really still unaware that I don't own this?

* * *

CHAPTER 18

"And we live to fight another day, Samsquatch. How about that?"

Sam had to smile as Gabriel practically skipped his way through the halls, ever present candy bar in his hands. It was a welcome change from the last few hours when then most the pilot could do was drool on his pillow and waggle a finger suggestively at Sam. Thankfully, just as promised the drug had worn off completely with nothing more than a minor headache.

It had been almost an entire day since the "termite attack" as Dean was calling it, although it didn't really feel that long, probably because most of them had slept half of it away doing their best to ignore the injuries that most of them had acquired. They had indeed become spoiled since they had gained their fancy healers, not having to worry about aches and pain anymore.

They had all sucked it up and blatantly refused to let Cas touch them with even his pinky finger, saying that they were all fine. Of course, they all pounced on Gabriel as soon as he was vertical asking for a little assistance. All in exchange for treats of course.

It was almost like nothing had happened, like Cas didn't almost leave them, like Gabriel didn't agree to leave. The crew was more than happy to just move on an accept that both Novaks were still there, and they weren't leaving any time soon.

This might have sit well with them, but Sam was still having a little trouble grasping it. Logically he knew that Gabriel only agreed to leave so that he could be there for Cas and of course to let Sam live. However, Sam still had a bitter thought that it had almost all come apart.

"So any chance that wack-job might survive?"

Sam's head snapped up from his feet to see Gabriel looking back, mouth so full of chocolate that his lips couldn't close completely. It was a wonder that Sam could understand the question at all around all that.

"The air he had left I'd say his chance would have been one in…"

"A very large number that sounds like another name for a dance move? I swear, robillium? The Jillion? How about the grillion? Wait...that sounds more like a sex move..."

A smirk.

"Sure. Any way. Those aren't odds I'd play. He's as good as gone," Sam finished. He still had those moments playing out in his head as he watched Cas kick Gordon to his death. It didn't bother him that Cas had done that, hell, Dean would have done a lot worse if he had ever gotten his hands on the bounty hunter. Dean _had_ done worse in the past. With Cas…he truly was only killing to keep his crew safe. There was nothing wrong with that.

"How's the leg?"

Once again Sam's head snapped up, "Fine. Just bruised, but I don't want it healed," he stated quickly before Gabriel could say anything, "I don't mind taking it easy for a few days if it means that you and Cas get to take a break."

"Hmm, well I'm all for rest, but it's not like I don't enjoy the excuse to…spend more time in bed," he said, waggling his eyebrows at Sam.

"…You know that Dean wants us to run that diagnostic on Gordon's ship right away, right?"

Gabriel sighed and nodded, eyes rolling dramatically, "I know, I know."

It truly was necessary. There could be a thousand and one threats coming from that ship. Bobby told them that it was common among bounty hunters, criminals, or paranoid individuals, to set their ships to self-destruct to assure that any sensitive information would be destroyed should they be "contained" elsewhere. That was Sam's and Gabriel's first thing to look for.

Their next task was to go through the contents of the ship, see just how much information Gordon had acquired on them, and how it was that he had tracked them down so easily. They had to know if they should be expecting more "visitors" in the near future.

Then lastly they would have to check over tracking devices. Unlikely they would find any since Gordon probably didn't want anyone trailing him, but they had to be sure.

Together, the pilots had thrown on some space suits and grabbed to tool box before heading over to the foreign ship on their hull.

* * *

There was indeed a self-destruct that would have blown a less than pleasant hole in their own ship, but it wasn't set to go off for another six hours and it was easily disarmed. While Gabriel explored the interior, Sam took the outside, no chance at the two of them fitting in the small cabin together.

As he flipped through the cabin's computer, Gabriel mused on how Gordy had planned to fit himself, Cas _and _Gabriel into this small vessel. Cassy would have probably had to sit on the bounty hunter's lap and Gabriel would be…how the hell was he supposed to fit?!

He was looking to the left and right of the single chair when he spotted a bunch of files tucked away. Inside his helmet, Gabriel carefully blew a bubble with his gum, careful to make sure that the sticky candy didn't touch his face mask and smudge it up as he opened up the first file.

Right away several photos fell out that he quickly picked up and promptly choked and then swallowed his gum as he saw what they were.

He flipped on the radio in his helmet, "Sam? Just found a fucking family photo! Dean is going to love this! One was from when Cas was like, 14 or something! Back when his eyes were too big for his face and he had this cowlick that looked like Bessy gave him a swirly. And wait till you see the shirt that Balthazar is wearing. The V-neck is almost down to his navel!"

"_Seriously? How did this guy get his hands on it?_"

Gabriel shrugged, even though Sam couldn't see from outside the ship, "Dunno. Never had a stalker before."

Looking at the other photos, he didn't get that same warm feeling. He saw Castiel huddled back in one of the cells at the Host. Then there was the security camera still of when they had stopped at that space port a week back. This must have been how Gordon had found them. No way it was anything besides pure unlucky luck. That was one mystery solved.

He continued to flip through the folder, seeing Cassy-bear's wanted poster, then Balthazar's, and then finally his own.

He was surprised to see that it was a more recent one, even if the only photo they had was one from 10 years ago. Only reason he knew it was a recent one was because of the very definite change in reward status.

It had nearly doubled in the last few months.

There was something also new on the poster.

_Wanted Dead or Alive_

Damn. That was how Gordy was going to take him back. He was going to be strapped to the fucking windshield or something.

Sam's voice over the radio had the pilot jumping violently, almost dropping the files he held, "_Gabe? Find anything else?_"

Gabriel quickly tore the file from the folder and shoved it into his space suit pocket.

"Nothing but burning material and some goodies for Chuck," he called back.

Dead was never a choice before on his posters. He quickly checked back on both his brother's posters, noting that Balthazar's also held the same warning, and only Castiel was it required he be alive. So the older Novak's were either not worth the trouble anymore, or the Host was trying to cover their tracks. It wouldn't change things any way. Dean would keep them out of the Host's hands. They would be fine.

"Hey, uh, Sam? I'm all set in here. No more traps to worry about. Chuck can come up here for his new toys later."

"_Okay. I'm all set out here too. Let's get back inside_."

* * *

"Well, I feel useless…"

Meg snorted into her plastic tumbler as she drank, amused by the forlorn look on the preacher's face. He too was drinking some whiskey trying to numb the shock of the last day. Well, Meg really just saw Bobby drinking and decided she deserved to knock back a few since she had been charged with the mopping up of the Captain's blood from the control room when Chuck had nearly passed out upon seeing it on the floor. Thankfully the preacher didn't mind her sipping on the last bits of his alcohol store. Seems there had been more and more reason for this crew to drown their sorrows in the last few weeks and he seemed to be running low.

"Yeah, all those years of priest training, and you get taken out by _one_ bounty hunter."

She could see him bristle at that, as expected from the grumbly old man.

"Hey, I gave him a hell of a fight!"

Another snort, "Yeah. Epic, I'm guessing."

Fumbling a little with his cup, Bobby leaned forward and pointed a sharp finger in her smirking face, "Now listen here, girly, there will be poem and songs, just you wait."

"Whatever you say, Old Man. But at least you got some play in. I missed out on all the violence! I even missed Dean getting shot! Even Castiel got more game in than me!"

She continued to rant and rave about not getting her weekly dose of ass kicking and Bobby sat back in his chair slowly while swirling the last sip of his drink around the bottom of the cup.

He supposed that he should be thanking God for getting them out of this mess, but he didn't. He thanked Castiel and Sam. They, well the whole crew really, seemed to be far more effective than God had ever been in getting things done. Bobby could hardly even remember the last time that he had done anything remotely priestly, and here he was chalking their continued existence up to these young people.

So was he a priest anymore? If not, what was he on this boat?

They had two pilots, a Captain, a mercenary, a Companion, a dealer, a healer, a mechanic…what was he?

He threw back the last sip, letting it sit in his throat and burn for a few seconds longer and then reached for the bottle again, filling up Meg's cup as well.

* * *

Anna had stayed in her shuttle ever since she had left Dean in the infirmary with the others. She hoped that everyone assumed it was because she was startled, even if that was not really the truth.

Really she was preparing herself for the future, which at this point wasn't very certain. The Guild had continued to leave her waves, less than pleasant ones "suggesting" that she return to them. It wouldn't be long now until the requests became demands. And it wouldn't be long now until she wouldn't be able to be there for the crew and she would have to disappear. Might as well cut the cord now…

So here she was, crying into her silken sheets, not letting herself go check on the others because she was forcing herself to let go. Why did it have to be so hard?

* * *

There might have been a little hesitation when Chuck went back to the engine room for the first time since…since that stuff happened. He might not have actually been hurt, well except for his raw wrists, but his imagination had turned the room into a scene of horrific proportions and he half expected to walk back in to find more blood all over the floors, just like in the control room.

As he walked into the room, glad to see it mostly in order, he carefully caressed the gun in his hands. Sam had given it to him to store somewhere where it wouldn't accidentally discharge and blow a hole through their life support. At first he wanted to refuse, thinking about all the damage that guns had done. They had killed so many, killed Becky, shot the Captain, been pointed at Chuck…but in the right hands…in the right hands it would be okay.

He tucked it in his toolbox.

* * *

"And her parents showed up to fetch her, and it turns out she was bloody sixteen years old!"

Cas chuckled just like he was suppose to as Balthazar continued his story. It was nice to be here with his brother, hearing these stories that had this odd ability to make him wish he had never heard them while at the same time making him glad that his brother was sharing things with him.

Dean was off, busy with getting things back in order, and that had left Cas kind of at a loss for something to do. He was still woozy from the healing and had been left to sleep it off, but Cas found it difficult to close his eyes without Dean there. He kept on getting these…feelings of incredible panic that when he opened his eyes he would see white all around.

He had gotten just enough sleep to be mobile when Balthazar had popped his head in to see how he was doing, and now the two of them were in his nest playing jacks, just like they had done when Cas was eight. The topic of Cas' attempted running away carefully avoided, as well as Cas' request to Balthazar...

"I swear, Cassy, she must have been some kind of genetic experiment, because I swear this girl was, uh," he waggled his eyebrows, "well, she was something," he finished wistfully and absently bounced the ball and picked up two jacks.

"I'm at four. Let's see you match that, baby brother."

Slowly Cas reached for the ball, calculating his next move, "I don't remember this story. Nor do I remember you bragging about it at breakfast ever…"

He glanced up to see Balthazar droop his head down, a sad look passing over his features as he fiddled with his four jacks, running his fingers over the sharper spikes, "Well, uh, it was about a year after you-you left. I didn't drink as much as I had before you were gone, but sometimes I just…I missed you so badly that I had to escape."

"With women and alcohol?"

"Is there a better escape?"

"I think I've found a few of my own," Cas said quietly, but there was a playful tone to it that brought the smile back to Balthazar's features. He had been waiting years for Cas to become part of the sexed-up community, but it still surprised him that his once so quiet and reserved baby brother was now a master at the horizontal tango.

"Yes, and as much as I bothered you in the past about details…I'm not sure I'm ready to hear about how my little baby brother gets his freak on. Especially since I live with the Captain as well," he teased and poked Cas in the ribs, making him squirm and crack a smile when his ticklish spot was hit. His brothers were very adept at finding his ticklish spots thanks to 15 years of living together as children.

Cas sighed as fond memories came back to him and glanced over the scattering of jacks, "I-I can win this."

Balthazar's eyebrows went up in a mocking manner, "Oh? I'm hearing a lot of talk there little physicist. Come on, show me what you got."

Castiel gently rolled the ball in his hands, staring at the bright red coloring and then to the jacks. For him, the world slowed down and he dropped the ball…

* * *

Both brothers looked up when Dean came down the ladder, whistling loud enough that they heard him coming from all the way down the hall. Dean's smile upon seeing them, well, Cas really, was bright enough that Cas felt a hot tingling all through his body. It was indeed very pleasant.

Dean of course had the same reaction upon seeing Cas, and not even Balthazar rolling his eyes at the two of them was enough to make his smile wilt in the slightest. It took a bit of effort, but Dean was able to pry his eyes away from Cas' to see the half complete game of spit between them, a very much larger stack of cards on Balthazar's side.

Cas noticed his curiosity, "This is the third game that we have played. First was jacks, then war, and now spit."

"And I'm getting a little sick of Cassy beating me effortlessly each and every time," Balthazar added bitterly, flicking his pile of cards.

Dean smirked at him and ruffled Cas' hair affectionately, "Well, we all know Cas is a butt-kicker," Cas gently swatted at Dean's hand, but didn't actually push it away and Dean chuckled. He left his hand there, letting his fingers nestle in the soft locks, liking how dark they looked against his light skin.

"So, uh, are you two almost done here? I've got some plans for me and Cas," Dean asked, looking between the two.

"I think I've had more than enough years of Cas beating me at every game, board, card, or brain teaser. I'll leave you two to….whatever you plan on doing. I'll just uh, be with Bobby perhaps. I hear his liquor store is running low and I want to get my fair share."

And Balthazar was gone in a flurry of fancy sport jacket and gelled hair leaving Dean alone with Cas.

After a moments' pause as they listened to the retreating footsteps of the posh man, they met eyes. Like always, Dean felt the same shock rock through him as he looked into those blue eyes. Dean didn't like saying corny things, let alone thinking them, but it really was like his eyes were an electric blue that would send a jolt through him like he a wonky electrical outlet.

He sighed and lightly batted at Cas' head, "Hey, I wasn't joking. I have something for us."

"Oh?"

Dean smirked at his suspicious tone, "Keep it in your pants, dude. Something else. Come on…"

* * *

"Ease it in, nice and slow…"

"You never go slowly. Why must I?"

"Because it's your first time doing this and you need to learn the basics before shooting your rockets off willy nilly. Now…keep your grip tight, thumb on the head…that's it."

"I figured that part out on my own, Dean."

"Just sayin'….Now, what do you know about thrusting?"

"Uh…this button?"

Dean smiled and nodded, his chin bumping into Cas' shoulder where the smaller man sat in his lap in the singular pilot's chair. Dean had insisted that this was the best way to give Cas shuttle flying lessons, despite his doubtful look and suggestion that the Captain could easily stand next to the chair and direct from there.

"That's right. You catch on fast. We'll have you out piloting Gabriel and Sammy in no time."

A skeptical raised eyebrow was his response.

Dean wasn't lying, or even exaggerating simply to make Cas feel good. He really was doing very well, like flying came natural to him. It had only been two hours out here and he had not only picked up the basics, but was not trying out a few maneuvers that he had overheard from those times he sat in the control room with Gabriel and Sam when they were practicing. It was impressive to say the least, and Dean couldn't wait to tell Sam. Already he wore a smug expression as he thought about it. His boyfriend was so much cooler.

Cas gracefully eased them out of a magnificent barrel roll, and Dean didn't even feel his stomach lurch in the slightest. Oh yeah. Cas was a natural at this.

Then Cas shifted in his lap, the movement causing Dean to moan a little and of course the other man heard and sent him a smirk. Little brat probably was taking revenge on Dean's insistence that they sit like this.

Out the window, the Impala came into sight, as well as Gordon's small little dart ship still on their hull. Chuck was going to be gutting it for parts later and then they would toss the rest, but Dean wouldn't have minded just blasting the thing to high heaven. He didn't like that monster's stuff sitting on his baby's hull. He sighed and leaned back in the chair closing his eyes for a moment.

Again he felt Cas start wiggling again, a very distracting thing since it had been a very long time since they last…maneuvered. Like…four days or something. Way too long. There was a slight stirring that might be making his tight pants a bit tighter than usual, but maybe Cas hadn't noticed yet. Probably was still too tired to do anything about it, and Dean wouldn't bother him since he seemed to really be enjoying his flying time.

A few minutes past and Dean still had his eyes closed, letting the warmth shared between them lull him into a half-awake state of bliss. Then Cas suddenly leaned away, the heat between them lost. Dean heard a few buttons being pressed, but he still didn't open his eyes. Cas knew what he was doing.

Then there was more shifting and Dean knew that Cas was turning around to face him. Dean felt his knees being placed on either side of his thighs, wedged between them and the chair's armrests. Cas seemed to settle there, sitting on Dean's lap facing him.

For a moment, neither of them moved, but then he felt lips upon his own. Soft, gentle, perhaps even hesitant, and Dean decided to encourage him by placing a hand behind his head and pulling him forward.

"Cas?"

"mmm?" came the muffled response from Dean's neck where Cas had moved his attentions.

"You know that you still need to fly this thing, right?"

"I put it on auto-pilot."

A tongue found it's way to Dean's ear and was licking at the shell. A full-body shiver shook through Dean.

"B-but aren't you still tired?"

Now Cas was nibbling at the lobe, "Very, but I told you I could handle a flying lesson."

"Uh…Not that I'm complaining or anything, but I'm not sure this counts as a flying lesson."

A soft chuckle and Cas was pulling back, and Dean watched as Cas licked his lips, "I believe this still counts. You have asked me…what I know about thrusting…" and at that Cas rolled his hips just so that their groins rocked together and then thrust up, just so that Dean let out a moan at the contact.

"I am simply showing you all that I have learned," he said calmly, and damn him, how did he make it sound so innocent while Dean was already stifling another groan and his breathing was sped up. Damn him and his beautiful poker face.

At this point, there was no hiding the fact that he was aroused because there was no way that Cas couldn't feel that since he was jutting up against it in that perfect rhythm. Dean let his hands cup at Cas' ass, helping him keep up the pace with encouraging squeezes. It felt wonderful, but soon this kind of contact wasn't enough.

Cas seemed to read his mind, or maybe he did read it and was already going for the Captain's belt the same time that Dean went for his. It took some great feats of balance for both of them to toss off their pants without getting off from the chair. If Dean weren't so distracted, he probably would have demanded a high-five for their accomplishment, but then Cas was back on him, skin touching skin and the thought flew from Dean's mind. They didn't bother with shirts, mostly because in the back of their minds they remembered how cold the shuttles could be, and that meant that Cas' coat also remained on, falling around them both.

Rubbing felt good, great even, but even with the friction of their skin it still wasn't enough for either of them. Cas was starting to let out a soft eager whines every few thrusts. It was like the noises that Dean would make when he was desperately looking for something in the mess that was his room. Thankfully, Dean knew just what Cas needed. He pulled away on hand to reach under the control panel and pull something out.

"Dean…why do you have lubricant in the shuttle?"

"Truthfully it's been there for a month. I kinda…I like to be prepared is all," he said defensively, but Cas just smiled and gave him another kiss where his tongue almost reached the back of Dean's throat.

"Hmm…so do I…"

And of course Dean hastily complied with a soft chuckle, getting some of the squirreled away lube onto his fingers and didn't waste anymore time in sticking in his first finger. And Cas, blessed Cas, let out those wonderful sounds as he threw his head back and bared his throat for Dean to nip at. And not one to let his partner hang there, Cas reached down between them to grip Dean in his hand, just like he had been doing with the shuttle's joystick only a few minutes before. Only this…this was much better, thought Dean.

By the third finger Cas was once again showing his adept knowledge of thrusting as he threw himself back onto Dean's probing.

"Dean…now."

"Bossy, bossy. You calling the shots again, O' Guardian of the Ship?"

"Yes, now hurry up."

Again, Dean chuckled but he was to the point where he couldn't hold out much longer and while things were getting steamy between them, the room itself was pretty darn cold to certain appendages.

"My turn for thrusting practice", he joked, but at Cas' impatient grunt he got down to business and pulled Cas forward so that he was right over Dean and slowly helped him lower down on it. This was a new position for both of them and the new sensations had them both letting out very loud moans, and they were fortunate that they were in a shuttle quite a distance from the Impala because surely the others would have heard that if they were in one of their rooms.

Cas breathed heavily once he was fully seated, but didn't close his eyes, knowing that Dean loved it when they were open. Dean himself felt his own eyes flutter however as he almost lost all focus thanks to the amazing feeling he got whenever he was inside Cas, but there was something in Cas' gaze that had him trapped, unable to look away. Not that he ever wanted to.

For all he was worth, Dean bucked up into Cas, savoring the heat and the tight feeling offered with each movement, and he was rewarded further with the gasps that kept slipping out from Cas' swollen lips.

Then there was another kind of burning that ran through Dean, right at his thigh where only a few hours ago there was a bullet lodged in it. Then it was gone as soon as it flared and he looked up to see Cas' hooded eyes looking down at him, one hand on Dean's chest somehow that singular touch making so Dean couldn't move anymore. He was pinned below him and, jesus, it was hot.

"Let me", and then Cas moved, fucking himself of Dean by pushing himself up and down with flexes of his legs. Surely the look of bliss that flickered over Cas' face was mirrored in his own because this…this felt amazing.

"You're in control, Cas. All you…"

He let Cas move, chose the pace, and because Cas knew just what Dean wanted, it was perfect. Still, Dean was greedy and didn't like to keep his hands to himself for too long. His hands that had been roaming all over Cas were lowered between them and took the length in his hand, giving long and strong strokes that turned Cas' grunts to long and drawn out moans.

They didn't last long after that and soon Cas was collapsed on top of him, both of them breathing heavy and not even caring about the mess of sweat and spunk between them. That could come later. Right now all he wanted to do was be here with Cas. They were family, and this was their home. And that was something.

He tightened his hold on Cas who only mumbled slightly and snuggled up closer with a sigh. Right there, Dean made another promise to Cas and himself. He had said he would always protect Cas, but there was more to it now.

He could never ever let anyone take Cas away.

* * *

A glance at his oxygen gauge showed that he had just entered the red zone of the marker. It was only a short matter of time now, and he was caught between wanting to just end it now or letting his instinct for survival keep him alive until the very bitter agonizing end.

Which was worse? Giving up or waiting?

He continued to drift as he fiddled with the latch on his helmet. All it would take was a small flick of his fingers…

He sighed and let his hand drop.

"Well…here I am…"

For however much longer.

* * *

So, this is what we have coming up on the Impala Series...

-What happens between Anna and the Guild?

-Where did Bobby come from and what are his connections to the Garrison?

-Why is Castiel so special?

-Crowley and Dick make an appearance.

-We learn a damn lot more about what went on at the Host.

-A kidnapping, a fight, a disappearance, a camp, an escape, a death, a deal, and a loss. (And not in that order)

Just to name a few things that will be answered in the next three original episodes. =^.^=

Also, a sad reminder that I will be shipped out in two days and I won't have constant internet, "very limited" were their words. My guess is that updates will be in large clumps of chapters, perhaps around 8,000 words a week posted. Maybe more. Most likely not less. So it may be a week or more until the next time I can post as I get settled in to my new living space, but keep an eye out for the next story! It will be called "Caged". And yes, that is a pretty decent hint at what the story will be on. Feel free to message me with any questions, but I won't hand out spoilers! See y'all soon!


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